I have the same question.
Sometimes my right arm/hand hurts worse than my left arm/hand, but that's just because I use it more. When I avoid my right hand and use my left, it hurts the same as the right.
I have not been diagnosed with RA yet, (My appt is on the 3rd with a rheumy) but the R factor test was + and from what I read, it doesn't seem to be a stretch.
On good days I am simply "aware" of my knuckles. I know when I use them, but is isn't bad enough to be a "pain".
I have described it as a "throbbing ache that doesn't throb".
Sometimes it feels like the "echo of pain"- like I have just smashed my arm/hand/knees with a bat five minutes ago, but I didn't. That's just the way it feels. Sometimes I wonder if they would feel better if I did.
Sometimes it feels like when you bash your 'funny bone' and the pain shoots down your arm and through your fingers, then back to your elbow, rebounding back and forth till you want to cry. That doesn't last long, though (thankfully).
Most of what I feel goes back and forth from being "aware" of my joints, to the "ache", to the "echo of pain".
If I use the joint more often, it usually hurts more- but not always. If the weather is changing, like storms coming, it will hurt more- but not always. It does not always need a trigger to hurt and it changes throughout the day. Some days are worse than others, some weeks are worse than others.
One thing I have noticed, is that it gets worse over time- it doesn't ever get really better after it gets bad, not for long anyway- but I haven't started treatment yet. I hope that will turn it arround.
Does this sound like what you feel?