Need advice

I have been communicating with my wifes family about the way she is acting.  Her father has sent me a response to an email that she sent him.  She states that she does not love me, and that the only way she is going to be able to get me to leave the house is if she sells it.  In reality she can not afford the house that she told me she could afford by herself when we got back together.  She is about to have her car repossessed, and she is telling her family all these lies about how I pay for nothing and she pays for everything.  What should I do?

    If I leave the house she will not be able to pay for all the bills and I can't keep paying what I am paying and move out.  She said she was going to put the house on the market before Christmas but she still has not said anything to me about starting the process.  She just continues to lie to everyone about everything.  about our relationship, about her money problems.  She continues to tell everyone in is all my fault.  I heard her tell a friend that was going through some relationship problems that people don't change.  I asked if her people don't change then why has he changed so much.  I told me that was my fault.  That I make her act like she does.  She gives other people advice and she can't even handle her own life.

     Should I leave her to fend for herself (of course I would also have to leave my daughter with her and I don't want to do that)?  I am not giving her money to help out any more but she is going to have her car repoed and she just started looking at a used BMW to by before her car is taken.  Does that make much sense?  She tells me that she would rather have a repossession on her credit then to have a foreclosure but she is telling her family that she may have to sell the house just to gt me to leave.  My name is also on the house so it will hurt me as well if it is foreclosed on.

    She is seeing her doctor and taking her medicine.  However as I have said in previous post, she has got her doctor believing she is fine and she has gotten her meds reduced.  She won't let me talk to her doctor and according to what she has now told her family, she does not love me.  She also asked them not to communicate with me.  I believe that is because she doesn't want them to know the truth about what is going on.

    Things just seem to be getting worse.  I think she actually is beginning to believe the things she is telling people.  It is like she is leading a double life.

I think you need to start concentration on your self and if I remember correctly, your daughter?

If she is saying she doesnt love you and her father is letting you know what she is saying, I think you should get your ducks in a row as far as protection, with family and assets and think about leaving her to help herself.  She is being very manipulative to the point of fooling her doctors.  I dont know if there is a way for you to make your own appointment with her pdaoc and let him know what is really going on.  But she seems to be doing everything to get you to "leave her alone" and I guess maybe you need to consider that.  I would hate to see you suffer anymore when she does not want your help.

Familyman, I only have a moment, but you know the reality of the situation. The fact is, you must speak to an attorney ASAP, find out your asset rights, custody rights (and take immediate action to protect both), and stop protecting her in any way. Call her doctor and TELL HIM THE TRUTH. If she doesn't like it....to darn bad. Tell her family the truth, if they choose not to believe it...their problem when her life blows up. By then you won't be there to blame and her family will see that what YOU said was real, and what she said was manipulation once they start experiencing some of it themselves. Protect your credit, and MOST importantly....protect your daughter. NOTHING comes before that. IF it is 50/50 custody, then do all you can to do that amicably for the sake of your child. Be present in her life. IF, at any point you feel your child is in danger....ask the court to intervene and award TEMPORARY custody to you until your wife stabilizes. Make it clear to all that you want our child to have both parents, but they need to be healthy and balanced, and working together for her benefit to be the best CO-Parents they can be. NOTHING else matters Familyman...nothing. If she wants to sell the house...sell it! Preserve your credit too, OR, if there is no community asset there, have your name quick claimed off the deed. Then, it is sink or swim all on her, and you are free and clear of whatever disaster she creates. I know it is hard to do, I know you are hurting, and I know you don't feel any of this is fair. You are right, it is not fair, it hurts like a *****, and it will be the hardest thing in the world for you...for awhile, but you will get through it. Hang in there. NOT taking the RIGHT action, will ONLY make it harder as more time passes. It will NOT get easier with time. Go work on you, go be with your child, go get your own life back. Good luck...LFW