Where did all the happy thoughts go?

Mornin'  Woke up way too early, and found all my happiness gone!   I feel stiff, bloated and sore and just dread another week at work.  We're coming into a very busy time of the year for me (I make a lot of goodie baskets that my boss hires me to make--she gives as gifts), it's the holiday season and as usual I won't be with my side of the family or son(almost 950 miles away).  Just the thought of all this is exhausting and depressing.  I don't want to do the baking however it does add income and there's no easy way to tell my boss no (I've been doing this for years).  This will be the second year in a row I haven't gone home for either Turkey Day for Christmas!  What gives! Where's the happiness I had just 24 hours ago?!  How can I go to sleep fine and wake up like this?  Dread going to my husbands relatives for any holiday (even he dreads it--how sad is that) there is always soooo much drama there; more drama is something I could do without; plus I end up doing way more work preparing the meals than my two sister-in-laws do and their kids drive straight up a wall (and I love children!) I feel like crawling back into my shell and coming back out on Jan. 2, 2009!  Sorry didn't mean to be such a downer first thing on Monday morning but just expressing how I feel.....

Thanks Bill! Since posting my creativity has already kicked in; I'm going to make up an order form for my boss telling her what I'm willing to make, the price and have her write down the time frame she needs the items in. Then she can say how much she needs and she can see how much I expect to be paid for my time and supplies. This should take some of the stress out of it for me. As for the missing my family part...I just can't get past that part; haven't been able to for 17 years (the years I'm not with them) my husband's family and mine are polar opposites lol and it's always been a stressful time. I have learned to put the Xanax in the purse though lol lol!!!!

Thanks for the ((((Hugs)))) Serafena!!! Right back at you with them!!!! Just having a game plan helps!!!!! I've already typed up the order forms and price list and they are on her desk ready for her to look at. This really is a crappy time of year for me but I think talking through things, having a proper dx, proper meds and having all of you will make it easier this (at least that is my hope). Unfortunately I'm the type of person that stews on things, creates bigger things in my mind and in general can be my own worst enemy, I think I've started earlier this year on being a pessimist--will try to get the reins on that. Thanks for listening and caring.