BP Spouse is feeling disconnected, is there anything I can do to help?

My wife's medicine was becoming less effective and she was almost constantly manic. Her doctor upped her meds last week, and now she is depressed and feeling disconnected from everyone but me.

Besides providing a safe, caring place, love, a low-stress environment, and a non-judgmental ear to when she wants one, is there anything I can do to help her through this phase?

Maybe they need to change her medication but WOW what support! Keep up the good work!

theronson;

Keep doing what you are doing & give the new meds some time. It may take a few weeks for them to fully work properly.

best wishes,

Rocket

I can understand the "better understanding" of your spouces BP after being on the brink of divorce - that's what it took for me to understand my DH as well. My advice is only like the others, let the meds take effect and if you see no change in a couple weeks say, then call her p doc!

Go to a couples spa retreat, dinner and walks outside. :)

Congrats on the love and care you are offering.

Hi theronson,

My guess is it's the disease, not the medicine -- although the medicine can definitely affect the libido. I have had periods where I've had to really work on showing interest and commitment to my husband, not because I didn't love him -- I always have -- but because I felt disconnected from everything. And that's the disorder. But because my marriage is important to me, I did make an effort even through it was very hard. Maybe your wife is experiencing something similar.

What can be done to minimize it: try not to push it if you can. She will heal as her mood shifts and she will come around to herself again. She will come back to you completely. If she loves you enough to work at it now, she is not going anywhere. And she will appreciate it if you trust her enough to just let her be. Be honest with her, tell her you love her, want her to stay with you, that you're not going anywhere, and that she can trust you. And that's pretty much all you can do. Wait out the mood swings. Hope the medicine works sooner rather than later. Get her to the best psych you can.

I hope this is helpful,
serafena

Serafina - Thank you for the perspective. I have many faults and one of them is continuing to pick at things, worrying them until they get worse. I know it does the exact opposite of what I want. This time I have pretty much done everything done what you suggested.

CapninHapin - Its good advice. While fishing doesn't appeal, what you are saying to me is to find an activity, event, location, etc. that has deep meaning to her and be together in a way that reinforces the bond.

Thank you both.

You have my sympathy Whyus.

All the advice from others about having your own life and taking care of yourself makes perfect sense, but it is so hard to apply in real life while also trying to be the supportive spouse. So much of my life has been wrapped up in being with her and focused on her, that I almost don't know where to begin.

WOW, Whyus.. That is pretty deep.. I hope I am not putting my spouse through such manic hell.. I hope he isn't feeling like you are.. Now, I am even more depressed! Why me??