Are bipolars more lonely?

ok, my first day and I'm talking to everyone!
My therapist and I were just talking about this yesterday. I still haven't worked it all out, but for me it is hard to make friends because I'm afraid I will form a friendship and then possibly go into a depression (which I do the most) and scare the person off. Or say something unkind or be misunderstood. I have big trouble trusting people too-that's probably my own thing.

I bet people think I am a selfish flake.  From their point of view I come and go and don't value the relationship.  Really, I am doing the best I can and saving them from my depressions.

I have 1 good friend that I've known for 10+ years.  She has seen me through my worst.

I try to open up to my SO.  It's really hard for me to talk about it because my thoughts race and I don't know what to say first, or how to explain it to a normal person.  Sometimes I send him and email or a link to a thread here.  I did that today and when he came home for lunch, he took care of my son, fixed lunch for him, played with him, and then came and sat with me and held my hand.  :love:

I have a penpal friend that might as well be my clone.  Our lives are so parallel to each other!  She completely gets it.  We both are dog trainers and both struggle to keep a business going with the moody, people-hating times.  She is not BP, but very similar.

I guess it really depends on how you are. How your symptoms manifest.... I suppose a lot of people pull away. I remember when I was younger I used to warn others not to fall for me. I'd just end up pushing them away and hurting them in the end. Which Is what I did with nearly all my guy friends. I rarely had girl friends. They were caddy and selfish. I was always looking for love. temporary....attention. I was great at it. But I could only do that for so long before I let them fall to the side. And the few that I've had in my life have fought to stay there. I have two best friends that are guys....probably helps that both have been in love with me at one time or another, forever it seems but Since I never slept with them It was easier to be around them. Besides they weren't really my type. I found as far as guys were concerned If I slept with them then they lost their worthiness to be close to me. (demented I know) But int he last several years I've developed some good friendships with both men and women. Couples mostly, but that family centers around either the softball team I play for or the park at which my daughter plays. You just have to have an instinct on who to trust and who you can't. I rarely give anyone anything they could hurt me with. But that also means I keep a lot to myself. I've opened up a little more to some of my friends in the last year but It's still a work in progress. I'm the type of person that reguardless of what someone tells me, IF things were to go bad between us, I'd never betray what they've confided in me as ammunition. I think it's cruel.....so I look for others like that. Who ever you are.... This may sound weird but you are loved. even by people you've never met. Take care.....

I find it hard to keep friends because of my moodiness. I tend to be "on again=off again" in my relationships, so yes, I tend to be lonely. Even within my family I can be very lonely when I am depressed, because everyone is scurrying around doing their own things and I feel left behind. Can make me very sad at times. I do try to connect with people and sometimes it works,,,at leasr for a short time. I tend to turn to my horse for companionship and "someone" I can talk to.

I have read everyones comments and they all seem like a part of me.  I find it hard to make friends.   One minute I am sending messages hanging out for people to ring me, and the next I just want to be alone.  I don't want to hurt the people around me so I keep them at a distance.  I think it is also hard when you have to edit what you say and feel because you know that they just don't understand if you tell them the truth, or just say what comes out of your mouth.

Aww its sort of reassuring to read that some of you have problems connecting to people like I do...I've also always felt there's something 'wrong with me' that stops me from being able to make friends like a normal person. I've never had a best friend, or even very close friends. Somehow I just can't have relationships, it never happens :/ I suppose I push people away. Its not so bad when I'm manic, then I'm outgoing as hell (although I do awful awful things that make people hate me sometimes :|), but when I'm depressed I barely ever speak. I just shut myself away.