Need some understanding please

Lately my wife says we haven't been getting along and just arguing all the time. For example, I didn't put a cup back exactly on the counter like I should have, she showed me and I said ok. Then she gets upset. Another, we were discussing about something coming up and I asked about how this was gonna be done and something else, and bam we are arguing she says and we just cant get along.

I ask her what is going on and explain I am not arguing, I am discussing about these things. No matter how I say something, if I say something else about something, bam, I am arguing with her. Its hard on me because its like I can not say anything. Things get to extreme real quick , like, I will just sleep in the other room, because I didn't care about the glass on the counter. I am working on trying to not take things personal as I know she gets mad quick and things come out quick.

Its just been a roller coaster, i.e. I love you, then a little later something happens she gets agitated and she can be calling me names.

Sorry for posting here, I just need some advice and understanding in how to handle conversations where I just don't always say yes, yes dear, ok, etc. She always tells me to tell her what I am wanting and this and that, but, it seems she really doesn't because of all this.

My wife has been the the pdoc and everything. She is on meds. Also, guess I should of mentioned she is BP.

She has a hard time separating herself from the disease. i.e. Because I have BP i am a *itch, I am angry and I am a terrible person. I try to explain softly its a disease that needs to be handled, but, that never helps. She takes ownership of everything.

Do you two have any children? If not, I would strongly advice waiting until she is stabilized. Of course, she would have to check with her obgyn about getting pregnant while taking meds. You may not even be considering kids now, but just a thought.
I believe there's hope for your marriage if she gets the proper treatment. Based on what I've read, bipolar is a very treatable disease, but that's it, it must be treated to gain stability in a relationship. Bipolar is very stressful on a marriage, believe me I know. Lastly, this disease does get worse with passing years, but again with treatment, you have the hope of a fulfilling and better marriage with a bright future. Don't give up now, I can understand how hard it is.

My husband and I went to marriage counseling...like 6 different times. The counsellor told us that 99 percent of the reason marriages failed was due to lack of being able to understand what each was communicating. She made us mirror back what the other one said. We would always get it wrong. My husband would say something and I would hear it differently than what he meant.

I would suggest marriage counseling. Try one or two. Find one that makes you work at communicating. It is learning and changing and both have to be willing to do that to save the relationship. If only one is willing to work on things counseling doesn't work.

It is a miracle...marriage counseling. My hubby and I even divorced and re-married and are very happy. We have been together 15 years. We are both recovering alcoholic and bipolar so you can imagine the colorful relationship trips we've been on.

You too can do it too. If we can...anybody can!