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Inner Child Therapy

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Posted 12/6/2011 1:56 AM (GMT 0)
My therapist has suggested we do Inner Child Therapy because of me feelings of rejection which started as a child with my mother. She was never an emotionally available person and I can remember trying to hug her once and she pushed me away. Because I suffer from BPD and Bipolar, my rages seem to be triggered by rejection by either a friend, or loved one. I would like to get as much information, feedback on this therapy before I begin so any help would be greatly appreciated.
Hugs
Posted 12/6/2011 2:21 AM (GMT 0)
Yes, rejection is so hard to cope with, with borderline personality disorder. I'm not familiar with Inner Child Therapy. I favor therapy that focuses of the present and the future. The past is over, IMO.
Posted 12/6/2011 4:31 AM (GMT 0)
Tortoise is very strong to be able to control the little child within, and she functions on high intellectual levels for the most part,meaning that her adult is in charge and the child within has

its needs met well.

However, for many bipolar patients, childhood trauma plays a significant role in the fracture of adult relationships. If the inner child is not able to calm itself, to feel comfortable and loved, and to be able to meet its intrinsic needs, all H@#!@ can break loose in adulthood if the child is still in control.

I think it's a great idea to go with the child therapy, Lynn. It may resolve most of your problems for you as you gain insight and learn how to care for your little child within.

Sounds like a great idea.

Good wishes,

It's Genetic

Posted 12/6/2011 5:18 AM (GMT 0)
it does. go for it. jamie. am here for you
Posted 12/6/2011 12:07 PM (GMT 0)
my 2c worth lynn, would be that DBT is the first step and psychotherapy is the second step when you have the skills to manage the very raw, intense and painful feelings. Hope this helps x
Posted 12/6/2011 8:00 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Lyn any form of therapy that gives us self knowledge, understanding, closure, peace of mind and a measure of control can do nothing but good.  Part of my CBT therapy meant me visiting my childhood - a very painfull place for me.  I was seriously and cruelly bullied at school and carried the scars all of my adult life.  Through talking about these painfull experiences I was able to adopt a different perspective concerning those children who bullied me  I now consider my tormentors to be cruel but not wicked.  Kids are cruel but they lack insight in terms of how their bullying might affect me over the years to come.  In essence I was able to forgive their childish misdemeanors knowing their actions were not born from a wicked heart.  I now have peace and a real sense of closure.  I hope you get the same.

Take care Keep sharing

Peter

Posted 12/6/2011 9:57 PM (GMT 0)
A very nice post, Peter, and I think you're exactly right. I can add only that
I think sibling rivalry in childhood leaves scars for a lifetime, even though we
may undergo counselling more than once!

Take good care of yourself, everyone, and let that little healed child out to play in a mature way.

It's Genetic
Posted 12/7/2011 2:26 AM (GMT 0)
very true if you don't have bpd... apply with caution with bpd
Posted 12/7/2011 10:13 PM (GMT 0)
I'm not really doing inner child therapy. But it happens spontaneously when we are talking about my childhood and the hurt I experienced from sexual abuse when I was 7 and my mother blaming me for the abuse instead of my stepfather.

The therapy will help you work through your feelings in a safe environment. The therapist will sometimes play the role of your mother so you can express how that rejection made you feel. We are often silenced as children, so it is very important that our feelings are heard.

Your therapist will also act as a supportive adult figure to validate your emotions. Your inner child will be comforted, feel validated and understood.

It is very scary and overwhelming though. You often feel worse at the beginning because you aren't used to being connected with your inner child so directly.

But I think it's so important because if you don't address that inner child then you are going to continue to rage and act out when people in your life behave in ways that are even vaguely similar to what happened in your childhood.

I've noticed that scared child coming to the surface, or the angry rebellious teenager that gets me in trouble.

I agree with Living Well though. I think it's crucial to do something like dialectical behavioural therapy first or along with psychodynamic treatment.

Psychodynamic therapy can last years. I did DBT group therapy for 90 minutes, once a week for 8 weeks. The skills you learn really help to protect you not only in your daily life, but also while you are going through other therapy and treatment.

Best of luck with your journey

xo
B
Posted 12/9/2011 8:07 PM (GMT 0)
My therapist and I do discuss my childhood but it hasn't been in depth. I have noticed that anytime the subject of my relationship with my mom comes up I burst into tears. Granted my mother was a wonderful mother because she made sure we had everything we needed, but I never got the love and affection that I needed. I was also the middle child having two sisters, I always felt I was lost in the shuffle. I would act out alot, make up crazy stories (like being raped...I know that is horrible but I did it) just to get attention. It was the wrong kind of attention, but I got it. I finally told those that I told those lies to that they were stories so I have been forgiven for that. I don't do stuff like that anymore thank god.

Something else that happened to me that I have only told to a couple of people is that I had an abortion about 12 years ago. It was just after I seperated from my husband and I started fooling around with someone. He was alot younger than me and I knew I shouldn't be having another child. I know to some of you this and the rape story is something that makes me seem like a monster. But it was a choice I made. I think it is still haunting me though and might be part of why I am so messed up.

To add to my complicated life, I haven't spoken to my older sister in well over 4 years now. She wiped her hands of me the last time I tried to take my life. My younger sister and I go through spurts where we won't talk and then we make up, but we don't have a good relationship. My mom still hasn't spoken to me since my meltdown a few weeks ago.

Anyway, to get to the point, I think trying to take the reigns from my inner child needs to be done. It's not going to be easy but I need to do this.
Thanks for all the feedback.

Post Edited By Moderator (tortoise11) : 12/16/2011 7:04:51 PM (GMT-7)

Posted 12/9/2011 8:56 PM (GMT 0)
It sounds as though the inner child therapy is beginning to take effect now, Lyyn. Good for you!

Once you get the little child within content and happy with fulfilled needs, then the mature adult will get the "reins" so to speak and you'll
be fine.

I'm so glad you decided to go with inner child therapy. That's just great! It can't be anything but good for you.

Merry Christmas!

I.G.
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