What Is Wrong With Me? Urgent Help!!!

So last year, I started to become a different person. I was always crying and I was going insane. I had no energy whatsoever. I was violent, angry and I was what my parents would call 'psychotic'. I was having hallucinations and seeing people and hearing voices whilst being paranoid and I was worried that the whorl wanted to kill me and that I wasn't safe anywhere. I saw a psychologist who referred me to a psychiatrist. In the end she told me that I was a smart girl who was 'playing' my parents to make them think I was mentally ill. This was not the case and my parents do not know what to do. I was depressed back then, but now things are somewhat different. I was surprisingly getting straight A's until term 4, when things got bad. I was hyper, constantly talking because my thoughts were racing and my mouth couldn't keep up. I would do impulsive things and spend money like theres no tomorrow. Sometimes I told lies and stories about one friend to another to cause a stir. I was still paranoid and having hallucinations too. All this went away for 2 months and then bam, it was back again. It all started with my obsessions. When I'm hyper I get obsessions and I don't talk about anything but them. My current obsession is Titanic and I have watched it 151 times in 10 weeks. I am banned from speaking about it because I it's all I ever talk about. At school I'm hyper, I'm impatient and can't bare to hear my teachers talk. I tell them to shut up and I constantly interrupt them. I am risky, I even pierced my own belly button because I thought it'd be fine. I'm also impulsive when it comes to my art work, I paint 3 large canvas's a day (on weekends) and I turn the lounge upside down making sculptures with everything I can find. I talking a million miles an hour again and my thoughts are racing back and forth. I have so much energy that I could run a marathon in minutes. I can't concentrate, I feel like a tree because my thoughts keep branding out and getting side tracked. Last night I had some hallucinations and voices were telling me what to do and I'm convinced that my neighbourhood are watching me through their windows and everyone wants me dead. Even that my parents are trying to poison my food, therefore I wont eat it. I am violent and threaten to kill people, I feel like the 'King of the World!' Sorry, bit of a Titanic moment there. I'm unstoppable and it can get really scary. I only just got a part time job and I really enjoy work but...I need help, I want to be in a psych ward so I don't end up hurting anyone, or worse. The only thing is, what about work, I cannot afford to lose this job, it's my first job! If I voluntarily go in, will I be able to be taken to work by my mum if I am in a fit enough state? What do you think could be wrong? Also, my grades are dropping from straight A's to B's and C+. My mum thinks I'm bipolar but I'm not too sure. I'm not asking for a diagnosis, just a little help as to what your opinions are! please help!!!
Also, as you can see, my moods have gone from depressed to hyper. I don't know very much about bipolar but I know that it sounds like what I might have. Delusions and hallucinations are also a sign of mania and to be honest with you, I think I'm manic at the moment :(((((

sorry,they are a sign of psychosis which is a sign of sever mania. I have symptoms that are bipolar and not schizophrenia so I think it sounds more like bipolar but I'm not sure. How do I tell my mum? she knows that I'm experiencing psychosis, she said it herself and she knows theres a problem but i don't know how to tell her!! :(((

oh just to add, I go to sleep very late (normally I would at 7 o'clock) compared to normal, about 11 o clock and I don't need much sleep. I am so confident and no job or task it too difficult!!!

Sorry for this being so long but...A lot of people are saying it may be schizophrenia, in which it may well be, but...why am I having these mood changes, for the first part of my story I was depressed, not severely but it was definitely depression. After that I was hyper for a few weeks before my symptoms went away almost completely. Next they came back again, all rapidly at once and i have been hyper since...for the last 6 months or so. Therefore I believe it may be bipolar. Some people in severe manic episodes do get psychotic symptoms such as hallucinations and delusions. BTW I am only 14

Post Edited (Crohnie101) : 7/24/2012 8:31:34 PM (GMT-6)

All I know to say is to keep trying. My daughter is 19 and has a Bipolar diagnosis but I'm not sure if there are other issues going on, also or not. She tells me often (outside of her aggression and mania) how miserable she is. I feel bad for her and want to help her be happy and have tried many avenues for years. It is thought that her bipolar stemmed from Lyme disease infection in her brain (but that is unproven) and she was diagnosed with bipolar around your age. As a mother, it is sad as you try to find help for your child and know that they are unhappy and not living a joyous life.

My daughter hasn't been so accepting of her diagnosis and hasn't taken prescribed medicine as instructed. I never asked for help on a forum about bipolar but wish I had. I think it is great that you are seeking answers and recognize that something doesn't seem right. I hope you and your parents will continue to seek help and not give up...no matter how long it takes. I can say this....Most mothers absolutely love their children more than anyone else possibly could. Just remember, she is confused, too. (I guess I should have said parents, sorry, I'm a single mother).

Keep the communications completely honest, open, respectful and full of love and y'all should be able to get on the right tract to get you the help you might need. Reserve important communication when you are both rested and not distracted.

Best wishes to you!

Yay, I've had a breakthrough with my mum. So this morning I was hyper and I was pulling knives out on my mum. Anyways, when she took my brothers and sister to school, I stayed at home and refused to go. I sent her a text saying 'You've done your dash, I have an entire box of azathioprine and I haven't even been taking so I guess it wont hurt if I take the whole box at once. Haaahhhhaaa i'm just hilarious. That will be the last time you will ever see me...alive". Anyway, so she drove back home and said if I have pills in my stomach I need to go to hospital. I told her that I was planning to OD and she was like, 'Jordan, you're bipolar'. I insisted that I was perfectly normal, but she knew, my mood change from being hyper for weeks, to suddenly wanted to OD was bipolar. I hope I'm not in too much trouble tonight. I do not want to come home to my father who hates me and will be absolutely pissed at me

Help! So Mum is finally taking me to a psychiatrist because of my problems but I am worried. My last approach to the psychiatrist was really scary therefore I mucked things up because I cannot explain my symptoms and problems in person. My mum has read my very explicit journal and by explicit I mean, fully out there with all my symptoms and thoughts every day for about a month. It was from that, that she actually realised that there was really a problem, an extremely sever problem. I am extremely worried about seeing a psychiatrist because I don't want it to end like last time (read my first post for details on that visit). Is it possible for my psychiatrist (a new one) to read my journal before she speaks to me? Should I let her know how difficult I find it to express these things in person and suggest she reads my journal so she can ask questions from that? I just cannot explain the whole story because I will start yelling and all sorts + it's not even possible for me to get it all out without stuttering and making a fool of myself. Also, my mum will be there so she will be able to explain some things. My main problem is my racing thoughts which make it extremely hard for me to group things and explain things properly without bringing up random information :( How can I approach my psychiatrist without having to start the first conversation, as I asked before, can I suggest she read my journal beforehand so that she can ask the questions rather than me explain everything?

Really need some help over here!!!!!

Thankyou Tortoise, I've kinda got a brief view of what I'm going to do and say so that it does't make me look like a 'smart ass' and I can actually get all of my points across :)))

Sure, I will definitely update after my appointment! Thank you for your help in the past comment too, I am the sort of person who plans ahead and hopes that my plans will work but it's always more comforting when somebody is able to back me up or say, 'Yep, show them your journal' sort of thing, just like you did! I'm also new to blogging via blogger/blogspot so once I have had my appointment and get a diagnosis, I will keep up to date with my blogging as well! Not too sure when it is yet, my mum is still a bit 'depressed' so she hasn't told me much but I hope to god it is not the same one again. If it were the same one, how would I go about the situation? Just do what I planned with the journal and stuff? Thanks again :)

There are several mood disorders as well as other physical and psychiatric conditions that cause mood swings. Only your psychiatrist can diagnose you.

Umm...I'm not on steroids?