i feel so lost

hello, this is my first post please ask questions this would help me out.

5 months ago my wife was diagnosed with bipolar/depression and borderline personality disorder, as of last month my wife cheated on me twice and the same day we agreed to separate her new bf moves in the house, at the end of july she kicked him out realizing she has a husband she wants to work things out and theropy for us and dreams are back on track. my step sons birthday and mine are at the end of july so every year we go camping wth her brother inlaw and his kids, fun times, this year not me but she wanted to work things out. i spend the nite with my wife and son things are good, the next day we leave to go sepparate vehicals 4 hours away 7 days. halve way there she text me that im am not moving back at home and after camping i need to go away. when we got to camp my 16yr old step son figued out that i was not moving back in and he had it out with his mother on how i can be replaced so quickly and the roller coster ride she puts every one around her threw, he says that if her stupid bf moved back in that he was moving out, her son my step son means everything to her as he should, she says im corrupting his mind into my thinking and the 3 of us had it out, she now wants to leave and go home in a very bad mood bad place in her head, she thinks were ganging up on her and she wants to leave with out him, we work it out thats its best if he rides back with her to keep her calm, i also feel best that i fallow back because were far away and its dark and her mood, the 4 hour ride back the same day was accually pleasent we were texting each other with real concern for each other, some of the chat was evan heart warming, she said i could spend the nite cause it was late. i did,


the next morning she made coffe and we drank and talked a little when she had to take a nap i gave option of me stay or go she said probably go would be best, i gave her a hug kiss and when i left i text good nite and she responded. 2 days latter my b day she dont want to speak or text nothin she said she wants distance.
no card no phone call or text to say happy b day, her b day is at the end of the week and i still love my wife should i give her the space or send her a card and flowers or nothing, i dont know what to do, at the end of aug is our wedding annaversery what do i do please help

Sounds like you are having a really rough time. I feel for you.

I have a couple of suggestions---

Here is an article I read that relates to what you describe is happening in your marriage - "My husband (or wife) is bipolar but refuses to be treated."
http://bit.ly/16AFVnz?refcd=88704&p=1157699

May I recommend a book by Paul Meier M.D. titled "Blue Genes: Breaking free from the chemical imbalances that affect your moods, your mind, your life and your loved ones". Might be able to find this at a book store or your local public library. Your wife may not be willing to read it, but it may be helpful for you as her husband.

Take care of yourself!

update, my wife knows i have years of things in our garage, she text me to say all your stuff is packed and ready to go. i was in shock that she wants it gone. is she moving on or is this the bipolar taking control, when im around she sudenly wants her boy friend present, i say to her it is uncomfortable for me to see him with my wife, it is not right, she says i make her uncomfortabe when im there, what is goin on hear does she not love or care for me anymore, im so hurt and confused, any advice or information is welcome. i know she wants to cut when im around, please help. is it best we part our ways, i love my wife and i know its not her fault, im pretty sure its not my fault. please help