gf of 5 years broke up out of the blue...

Sorry for the length, but I really need some support. Please...
My girlfriend of 5 years broke up with me a week ago, totally out of the blue. Everything was great between us, we were always happy to see each others and had a good time. We were talking about our future pretty often too. We are both 23 and were not living together yet, but I was pretty much over at her place all the time. We were supposed to move out together in a year or two. I am still in university and she finished her degree 3 months ago, now working full time. We were planning a euro-trip for this summer and everything was good. I got home one night and she broke up with me, told me she was deeply unhappy, that she saw me as her best friend and family but that she wasn't able to have those romantic feelings anymore. All of that in 5 minutes, then she left and asked me not to contact her cause she didn't want to doubt her decision. She told me if we were meant to be we would end up together but for now she wants to be alone.

I'm not 100% sure that she is manic-depressive, but after reading a lot of stuff, I think that's what it is. We've been together for a long time and it's not the first time something like this happens (even tho this is the worst time). And it's almost always at the same time of the year. The first time was 2 years ago, she tried to break up but changed her mind an hour later. Then last year (also in March), she was studying abroad for almost 6 months so we were doing long distance. I went to visit her for 2 weeks and while i was there, she broke up with me but we got back together the next day. She apologized a million times for that, felt super bad, cried and told me she was so happy that I waited for her. Then now. I don't know if it's possible, but I kinda see a pattern.

Also, the same reasons always come up... ''I'm not happy with myself, I am lost, I need to figure out stuff on my own, it has nothing to do with you, but I don't think we are meant to be...''. It doesn't seem to make sense for me, cause she always told me she loved me, that she wanted to have a family with me and that I was the love of her life. Even a week before the break up, she told me before falling asleep that being in my arms at night was her favorite moment of the day.

After reading on the subject, all of her reactions and mood swings make so much sense. She used to sometimes scream at me in a very irrational way, for insignificant stuff (for example not getting a plate to eat a cupcake, or not noticing a red spot on her lip...). Also, she rarely wanted to go out with other people and didn't really have friends. Sometimes we would get ready to go somewhere, she seemed excited to go, but then when it was time to leave, she used to tell me to go alone cause she wasn't in the mood anymore. Her self-esteem was very low too, she used to tell me stuff like ''I don't like meeting new people 'cause I never know what to say, and they would probably think I'm boring anyway''.

She's a stressed person in general. In the last year, she also gained quite a lot of weight and had unexplained pains in her stomach (she saw more than one doctor and they were not able to detect what it was). She was always tired and didn't really have motivation. She didn't like her body and we didn't have that much sex (she would do stuff to me but barely wanted anything back).

After the holidays, she told me she was unhappy and sometimes had suicidal thoughts. Stupid me, I only cuddled with her, telling her not to think about stuff like that, thinking that it was only a phase and that it would go away on its own. I didn't do anything about it.

I don't know if the fact that she lost her mother at a young age (14) could have something to do with it. She died from cancer. She used to see a therapist 1-2 times a week for a couple of years. She stopped therapy a year after we started dating, saying she was now happy. Also, the fact that she is bisexual... when we started dating she told me she felt bad and that it wasn't fair to me that she was sometimes attracted to guys, that I should deserve someone who only wants me. But I told her it didn't matter 'cause I could be attracted to other girls, too. Anyway.

So now, we've been broken up for a week. She asked me not to contact her so i did not. But she texted me and called me yesterday (so 5 days after no contact), telling me it was too hard not to talk and she wanted to know how i was doing. That she would understand if i didn't answer. I did not. But I sent her an email 4 hours later, saying i was doing ok and that i was ready to support her in any possible ways. Now she wants to meet next week to talk.

I really want her back cause I love her with all my heart, and I know what a great couple we can be. I would marry this girl on the spot. I also want what is best for her and I want her to get better. What should I say to her next week? Should I focus on me being there for her and leave the relationship part aside? I'm really confused about this situation...

Thanks BenA for your answer.

She did sometimes stayed up until 3AM just watching series. Or she had sudden urges to clean her room and house. But normally, she would oversleep more than anything. Sleep to avoid doing stuff.

There was never any accusations of infidelity between us, even tho she lived abroad for 6 months so I don't know. She told me nothing happened and I don't think she would do something like that, but yeah. Her sex drive has been very low for the past months overall.

I'm meeting up with her in a week. I'm pretty stressed, not sure about what to talk about. I definitely want to be there for her. And think about her getting better + me getting my life in order before our relationship.