New Member-First post need advice

Okay, the past few months wasnt feeling myself and was starting to feel anxious alot and panicking over ramdom thoughts in my head. Gradually i felt this getting worse and more frequent. Started to feel not alive (like i was in a dream). FINALLY last month while at work i had a nervous breakdown and had terrible racing thoughts, some self harm some of just OCD variety where my mind was just puzzled. Next day i hit rock bottom lost all drive and it was a struggle to even go to work the next few days. Sleep i was having a problem with before this as well.

this sounds more like depression BUT last year earlier i was feeling myself just happy, april i had a panic attack and july 4th i had one too but i was able to return to my old self then it started gradually going downhill the rest of the year and into this year. Like a 180 degree turn.

Im thinking bipolar/OCD because ever since that breakdown ill feel like im becoming myself again, then a thought pops into my head and sends me down again. My psychiatric nurse gave me klonopin for the panic and anxiety and has helped but racing thoughts and irrational thoughts of doing self harm still have not gone away. Its frustrating and i want the ryan back. She put me on effexer XR before her month off monday but after the first dose it was awful, shaking and nauseous and trouble functioning, made panic/anxiety worse. stopped that asap and still feeling like crap. My question is during our initial visit she said she was leaning heavy towards bipolar. So why not a mood stabilizer like seroquel or latuda instead of something of an SSRI?. I took zoloft for depression in high school now 28 and had a nasty reaction to it. Sorry for the long post just trying to be descriptive as possible

Thanks for the reply, i took it tuesday and felt sick to my stomach still yesterday and only had a snack the entire day. Today i woke up with shaking/tremors, took a klonopin and ite better but eating is still difficult. Possible that the one dose of effexor XR has hurt me instead of helped me? I have had a reaction to an SSRI before while on zoloft 10 years ago. Decided to give anothee psychiatrist a call yesterday and left a message. Just doesnt seem right with this one after my second visit and her perscribing me something for a condition she didnt mention in our first meeting (bipolar) and gave me something with an SRI over a mood stabilizer instead

@THE HAPPY TURTLE, Thanks for the advice. It weird during the day sometimes i can feel myself getting better than then ill have these "panicking thoughts" go through my head and then make me bottom out and have terrible anxiety/panic where all i want to do is just be in my bed. Last week i felt better (not 100%) but i felt i was getting better but then i get these thoughts and easter dinner i had to leave and drive around because i didnt want to see anyone. Its like and an up and down cycle ever since my mental breakdown last month. Its like i feel im turning a corner and being happy then bam bottom falls out. Just want the old me back. Remembering what i was like earlier last year is helping me see that i CAN and WILL return to normalcy again just difficult lately. Changing docs as well since this nurse practicioner is harder to reach than the president. Lol

Well her secretary called and asked how the effexor XR was working for me. Was honest with her and told her after one dose i would not be able to continue taking this medication. She then replied after i told her what i felt and why i decided to quit it after one dose the psychiactric nurse said she will give me a call in a couple days.

The klonopin has helped me overall as im able to function at work and other activities (still kicking butt in my bowling league). But i still get random panicking thoughts that make me go down for a few days then i get better and the cycle repeats. I dont feel depressed except for the first couple days after my mental breakdown. Just the racing obsessive thoughts are giving me fits and making me feel further away from myself i was. Sorry if im being too descriptive but im always honest in what i experience and feel it helps me talking to others.

For reference on klonopin .5mg/once a day in the morning. Not a high dose as i know i dont want to feel addicted to a benzo

I will be getting better just have to find the right drug and i will be on the path to recovery!

Thanks for the update REDGLI2012.

I am glad she is listening to you and working with you closely on this. It nice when we have supportive docs. Be sure to record how you feel with each adjustment and change.

UA

sounds like some coping skills will help you. to reduce anxiety. also you have to give the meds a chance. 6-8 weeks to kick in. any earlier you may actually miss out on the therapudic level. therapy? this is a great option to process info and recive coping skills.

Just hard today, just couldnt bring myself to take the brintillix again last night. The nausea is awful and havent eaten a darn thing today. Im just resting in my bed after i got off work 12 pm EST. Think im just gonna stick with the lamictal for now. Felt good earlier in the day and at work but now im just headed downhill again. Just losing my drive

Just a terrible feeling right now. Just feel so sick to my stomach and weird. Tried 2 25mg lamictal this morning and actually felt stable and better but when i got off work gradually i got worse and now i feel drained and heart pounding and just down. Got maybe two hours of sleep last night because i was so tense. Going to call my pdoc tommorow and explain to her how i feel

User thanks for the reply im at work and still going through my usual routine at work that gets the job done the way i want it ( i always set goals for myself in everything, father taught me if your not gonna give 110% into something dont do it). I had a better sleep last night with second day off that bintrellix. However, this morning i did take 50mg of lamictal this morning and NO klonopin since 1am yesterday morning (.25mg) to get to sleep. Took a pill with me just in case but i dont want to depend on a benzo long term. IMO my last depression in high school after i cold turkied the Zoloft that i had an allergic and near fatal reaction to i feel that if i find the right medication it should tackle ALL the depression, anxiety and panic attacks.

Did research last night on lamictal for depression both bipolar and clinical depression and the reviews are fantastic for those that dont respond well to SSRI/SNRI'S (like me). Gonna tell my pdoc to try to play with the lamictal instead. Who knows though.

Efficacy levels? What exactly is that so i can educate myself on this.

Setting goals is a good idea to achieve things.

I am glad to hear that it sounds like the change in combination and dosage is working for you.

UA

It may take some time, but I hope you will feel yourself again. You may feel different each time there's a dosage adjustment. Or you can feel the same. It depends... everyone is different.
I'm glad you're getting some sleep.

UA