WOW trish
i cannot tell you how much i understand what you are going through. you came to the right place though. this forum is the best thing for all of us.
having bp and working is impossible, honestly. but what choice do any of us have. we either work, or we live in the hospital and lose EVERYTHING.
so, what a dilema. i have such a strong opinion to this. in order for any of us to get better, a huge part is getting the rest we need...meaing the right kind and the right amount. we also need to devote time to exercise, "me-time", therapy, and appts. with all of this it's a wonder how we even HAVE time to work. plus you have kids, so there's even more pressure for someone like you.
the biggest part i think is the rest.
anyway, working brings so much harm to our disorder and our recovery, especially if you have a job that is even a little stressful. of couse, i should make a mention here, i am sure that there are bps out there who LOVE their job and it actually helps them.
to a degree mine does too, but like i said before, it does bring a lot of harm to my recovery.
we can only do the best we can. my advice
try to find a job that isn't overbearing in time and stress. it's important. don't work a single hour more than you can handle, and if you feel stress, then you shouldn't be there. it's hard do find something like that, but its important.
i hope i helped a little...i would also ask your doc/pdoc/therapist whomever...what they would say about this situation
i might not have made much sense, i'm pretty hypnomanic right now
take care,
mogli