Bipolar and Insurance

I have some major questions for you all. Im in between a rock and a hard spot here, and im having a very hard time dealing with it. Basically Im getting married in 4 weeks, and trying to find insurance to cover my treatment costs (ha). Ive been declined by my fiance's coverage (which i would have been added onto) and I have been told that i basically wont qualify for any insurance because i am bp. Currently i am covered by my parents insurance as i am a student living at home, but will lose this once im married. As far as I know, I dont have any other options other than my furture husbands insurance, which is actually not an option. So this leaves me with...nothing. I dont know what job i will have, as im moving out of state after the marriage, and have not found a job as of yet.

What options are there? I need treatment - medications and doctor coverage is a must. But i cant get it...and its not as if we will be making enough to afford it. Where do i go for help? I know i wont be eligable for Medicaid - but there has to be something, right?

On top of trying to figure out where all of my resources are - im just overall having a really hard time with this one. I hate myself for having this disease that is socially unacceptable, and ultimatlely something that will just cause my family problems. I want nothing more than to go off my meds and deny the fact that it even exists. I feel like im an outcast, and that the world would be better off without me. That is the message im getting anyhow. No one is willing to help someone like me. I must just be crap under someone elses shoe. Im fighting giving up - and im having to fight really really hard. My family doesnt understand why its such a big deal to me - but the fact of the matter is that it is a big deal to me. They are trying to help, calling around and all of this, but they cant help me feel less crazy, and they cant help me feel like i wont be a burden to them for the rest of my life, even if its only financially. Maybe all of this is just more stress than i can handle right now. I dont know - but I dont know what to do or where to go anymore.  

Please let me know if you have any advice for me. I need something, i need to know what to do before i just lose it and quit. I want to find options and give hope a chance - but i dont even know where to start.

Thanks for your help.

Rock

Hi Reesa Shea,

You got me thinking about what lies ahead for me.  I'm currently covered under my boyfriends benefits because we live together therefore we are common law in Canada.  I lost my benefits when I was laid off from my job while I was on longterm disablilty and I was fortunate enough that my boyfriend was able to add me to his benefits with no questions asked because I had already been diagnosed BP at that point.  Although I am just now accepting my diagnosis almost a year later!   So I completly understand that you want to deny the whole thing because I have been myself but denial isn't going to get us anywhere!  I understand your frustrations with your family but it sounds like they are trying to be supportive and help you out in anyway they can whether it be calling around for you or backing you up financially when you need it.  But when you are in our position and you feel low about yourself because you even have a disorder to begin with and your not "normal" (what ever that is!  ) you tend to feel guilty and/or ashamed to accept/recieve help from others that you may not have needed before. I think you should try to embrace the support your family is giving/offering you and although they will never understand what it is like to walk in our shoes they will always be there to help us walk! That's how I look at it anyway. I also want nothing more than to go off my med's but I've read that-hmmm maybe it's just easier to quote:

"If a person is well for a long time, does that mean medication is no longer needed?  No, it is possible that the inllness has entered into a quiet period.  Or it may imply that the medication is working at preventing symptoms.  If the person then stops the treatment, the risk of relapse is high: there is more than an 80 percent risk of relapse within two years.  Relapse may occur even after many years of stability."

Sigh!   This makes me wonder if I'll be on med's for the rest of my life although once I am doing well for a long period of time I am definetly going to try weaning off my med's and see how I do.  I'll take the risk but accept the fact that if I don't do well without them I'm a lifer!

 I am fortunate to have a very supportive family and early on they made it very clear to me not to feel bad about relying on them for anything because that is what family is for.  My families dynamic is a little differnet because we lost a sister to suicide and after I was diagnosed a little after a year and a half ago now we realize that she was BP as well but she had a terrible experience at the hospital she was hospitalized at and got a horrible doctor that criticized her instead of helping her.  She passed away over 10 years ago and medication/the mental health industry was completely different back then.  So as you can imagine my family has rallied around me and has been extra supportive because of our family history.  I am so thankful I found HW though because there is a lot I've gone through since I was diagnosed that I prefer to not discuss with my family because I don't want them to worry about me. 

As for giving you advice regarding your insurance dilemma I'm kind of at a loss because things are different in Canada and I'm assuming you're from the U.S.  Although I have coverage under my boyfriends plan at the moment when I am done school and get a job in my field I'm sure I will be offered the same benefits package that the rest of the employee's have with no questions about my medical history being asked.  I'm not sure if companies in the states operate differently and I know it depends on the company.  Since you are still a student hopefully when you enter your career you find a job that provides you with good benefits.  I know that doesn't solve your insurance dilemma for the time being but hopefully that gives you some hope for the future   For the time being I think you should accept the financial support your family is offering you because it will definetly be a challenge to find an insurance company that will give you coverage with the knowledge that you're BP.  It is sad but true!      It's really unfair as well!  I took a cognitive behavioural therapy course after I was discharged from the hospital and they had dedicated a whole class to discussing the injustice of how people with mental illnesses are treated/viewed and the major topic was "Insurance Companies!"  I do sympathies with what you're going through at the momment because when I found out I had been laid off I nearly had a heart attack.  I thought I was going to lose my longterm dis. coverage as well but I only lost my benefits and if I didn't have my boyfirend I would have been in your boat and would have had no choice but to accept help from my family because I definelty could not afford my treatment myself. The only other advice I can give is to maybe check with your local hospitals mental health unit if they can put you in contact with a social worker or inform you of any programs that might provide some sort of assistance. Like Ashley C said maybe you can get samples from a few different sources.  Either way I wish you the best of luck and I hope this matter is resolved for you soon so you can concentrate on your up coming wedding. Hugs

Emily a.k.a OhSoSad