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Newly diagnosed,need encouragement

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Bipolar Disorder
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Posted 7/27/2006 3:24 AM (GMT 0)
I'm so glad I found this forum. It looks good so far. My problem with my diagnosis is trouble with my close friends. I have no family so my friends are my main support. They have been with me through thick and thin these past 12 years that I have been treated for major depression but as fate would have it until recently I would not accept a diagnosis of bipolar. An excellant Dr. and many hours of talk convinced me that I am indeed bipolar and have been for a very long time. Since then my friends seem angry and judgemental toward me, my doctor and therapist. A couple have even said I should get off all meds and straighten out. I find them difficult to deal with right now trying to adjust to new meds and a healthier lifestyle but I also feel very lonely without them in my life. Any suggestions on how to deal with them would be helpful. Thanks!
Posted 7/27/2006 3:36 AM (GMT 0)
Welcome Catnip
Ahhhh...the reactions of family and friends. It never fails. Just do what you need to do, and a real friend will come to grips with it. It's gonna take awhile to stabilize, they don't necessarily get the drug combo right the first time so you may need adjustments. Just try to be patient. Hang in there. The drug trials and errors aren't much fun, but once they find the "cocktail" that works for you, you will be astonished at the change. So will your friends.
Remember Catnip, this is about you, you may have to just back off until you feel more able to deal with them.
I'm truly sorry for your dx, but you found a good group here. You post as often as you feel the need. We'll be here for you.
Take Care
Ellie
Posted 7/27/2006 7:32 AM (GMT 0)
Hi Catnip (good name!),

Welcome to this forum!!!

I'm here on the other side of this, trying to learn more about manic d/bipolar in order to try to do the best for my ex and hopefully us again in the future. On the one hand I'm astonished: your friends don't know how lucky they are that you have now been properly diagnosed and are getting treatment. -- They can now help you recover, rather than just watch helplessly as you veer backwards and forwards. And then, on the other hand, a little voice kicks in and reminds me that I didn't know a whole lot about manic d/bipolar a few months ago when things kicked off here, and, though I didn't deny that this could be the condition of my ex, it was a shock. Maybe that's what they're dealing with: the shock. The best thing I can advise is that you get your doc to recommend some reading for them to help them understand the condition better, and how crucial diagnosis and treatment are. They may also have recently seen you in a mania phase,think "but, hey, you've got plenty of energy" and just not get that this is part of the cycle.

All very best to you,
Rosie
Posted 7/27/2006 2:34 PM (GMT 0)

sad   Hey! This If my first post! I hit 'rock bottom' at the end of 1995 and finally switched doctors. The first day I went in to my new Doctor's office I was hysterical. It took all the strength I had not to start balling in the waiting room. I went in to his room and told him that I though I was bipolar in an 'I'm not going to live much longer' tone. I filled out a form to check symptoms after he talked to me a while, and he said "yup. I think your right......". I suddenly was relieved and more depressed. Like the finalization of death feeling. He put me on 3 different meds and one of them is Lithium. For some reason on the drive home I Thought about the perscription of Lithium. I called up my husband and said "it's official. I'm nuts.". Then I thought about my mom who was at her house babysitting my 4 and 3 year old. I didn't know if I was going to hold it together when I saw her. I had to because my brother and I are all my parents have left. My other brother died out of the blue in 1996 and she found him in bed after he never woke up. He was sick and what he had was a silent killer. So, out of respect I try to never upset her with health issues. So I made it seem like it was a good thing. Which truly it is. Now since I've been on my meds I feel so much better except for PMS. I completely relapse (we're working on that one). After suffering for 17 years with this, I finally have some relief and know what it is. So my experience is great and awful at the same time. Guess what too- my mother has been the ONLY supportive one out of EVERYONE. Maybe except for my best friend Jackie. (Love you Jack!). My husband "Doesn't want to hear it anymore" (besides that he is not a you know what. I'll let him live. :-)) and no one else does either. When I'm having a bad day I don't have anyone. I'm trying to take care of my kids too. I tell them I dont feel good and I'm sorry. That's why I'm here. I need people who understand. I'm crying now and I'm sorry if this is so depressing. It's a good thing my dad has taught me to have a wicked sense of humor. Maybe I'll go watch some Monty Python and have a laugh. Thanks everybody and I hope my experience of being diagnosed has helped someone! :-)  

Posted 7/27/2006 3:14 PM (GMT 0)
Welcome Jem5,
Glad you found a doc that managed a correct diagnosis. It doesn't always work that way. Stable is great, isn't it!
Hope you have a wonderful, supportive experience with Healingwell.
Take Care
Ellie
Posted 7/27/2006 9:54 PM (GMT 0)
Thanks everyone! I guess I am taking some right steps. I am suggesting some readings for my friends though I don't think any of them will do it. I am staying away when I can't handle their attitudes and I'm becoming more private about what I am going through except with people who understand, like this forum and my doctor and therapist. It is so true that when I am going through the worst I feel so alone but when I am manic the whole world belongs to me. I have to keep in mind that even my perceptions aren't even reasonable at times. I look forward to coming here everyday. Thanks again, Cindy :-)
Posted 7/27/2006 10:36 PM (GMT 0)
Hi.. my name is katie and im new to this forum as well. I was diagnosed in late may of last year (my senior year) and i feel your pain. I had slowly been withdrawling myself from my friends since the end of the previous school year (my junior year) and i really only hung out with my boyfriend for about a year now. I had no idea i was bipolar and now i look back and realize i ruined many relationships with my friends because i was a hermit basically. I dont know why your friends arent accepting your manic depression because honestly, it could have gotten A LOT worse if left untreated. I guess i can't help you make your friends understand, i guess maybe they wont ever understand completely. Im not sure how old you are, im only eighteen but i'll talk to anyone if you ever want to. I sometimes wish that there was someone around here that was bipolar that i could talk to, but the truth is, if there was i would never know it.
Posted 7/28/2006 12:00 AM (GMT 0)
Hi guys. I wanted to say that I think my problem around here is that people think it's complaining. The 'knock it off, whats wrong with you, your a drip' type thing. They think your feeling sorry for yourself when in fact I feel like I'm taking care of someone else because I'll be telling myself "hang on. It's ok. Don't do anything stupid. I love you". Almost as if the bipolar takes me over and I don't want it there and yelling to get it out of my head. When I got diagnosed I bought a couple of books to educate myself and that was awesome. It taught me how it truly is a scientifically proven disease. How cool is that? It's NOT you.
Posted 7/29/2006 2:18 AM (GMT 0)
Hi everyone: I was diagnosed in April of this year and it was the best thing that ever happened to me. I didn't realize I was so crazy but since being on meds everything in my life is better. I know some of my coworkers think I'm "crazy" but I just don't care. I'm 56 years old and I quit caring what other people think a few years back. I know thats hard for some of you younger ones but trust me, you will come to terms with that and in the process discover what real friends are. You will hear "be patient" a lot. I know that being patient is the last thing you want to hear but it is the most truthful answer. Finding the right meds may take awhile. While you are going through the trial and errors of the medicing game be particularly kind to yourself. If you are able, take some time off work. All this falls under the Medical Leave Act so it is legitimate time off. Good luck to all...Lazy
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