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TEEN OUT OF HOSPITAL, ha!! A LOT OF GOOD THAT DID!

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Bipolar Disorder
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Posted 9/18/2006 2:23 PM (GMT 0)
Thank you, He started a special school today. They couldn't handle him at public school. I'm REALLY not comfortable with this "school". It's more like a prison for really BAD kids! Highly structured with really rough kids! Only 100 kids but they seem to be the worst of the worst! Matt went from private Christian school to the opposite end of the spectrum, sigh...HAS ANYONE HAD ANY EXPERIENCES WITH THESE SPECIAL ED SCHOOLS?? Matt says he's nervous and thinks all the kids are out to beat him up! I feel like I felt when my older son left for Kuwait before the Iraq war started!
Posted 9/18/2006 6:11 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Diane

I cannot recommend what is best for you and your son. I do think your son's safety is of the utmost concern. If you and him feel this school is not safe, please do not make him go. This could be a wonderful compromise situation for you and your son. If you both work towards a common goal at a team, it may be the crack to get back into your son's world and he into yours. Because Matt realizes the kids at this new school make him nervous, there is still tremendous hope. If Matt had gone there and loved it, well... But your son realizes he is not like those special ed kids. What a great thing to focus on.

Good luck

Cap
Posted 9/18/2006 6:16 PM (GMT 0)
I agree with Cap.
It might be difficult to believe at times, but it sounds like in there, deep down, your son is really unhappy and wants to be normal.
He obviously loves his church activities!

A Christian school would be fantastic for him, if they can learn to deal with him.
If he can get counselling with one of their preachers, maybe even better... that could be the thing that they accept to take him back, and the thing he has to do to go back... and I think he'll find it helps him more than he'd admit!
Posted 9/18/2006 8:08 PM (GMT 0)
I'll see how it went today. Man...schools these days! (My kids haven't gone to public school since elementary) They're frightening! My sister just called and she's pulling her daughter out of public Middle school because the kids pick on her terribly!! It's so sad when we have to "potect" our kids from the schools. We're here in Califrnia and the schools are just awful! Life just never goes as planned, does it.
Posted 9/18/2006 10:25 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Diane,

I agree with the others that if this makes him nervous and upset it's best to get him out -- after all, everything else aside, things like this are a *huge* trigger for bipolar. If he were just a teenager playing up, a spell in this place might not be a bad idea (hee hee), but this is an illness and this could be the worst possible thing for him.

That said, like the others I also agree that this might be a useful tool to help mend your relationship. A bit of the old "I'd like to help you, but you have to help yourself for me to be able to do that" kind of conversation might not go amiss.

I don't kow what your options are on the school score though. -- Is it possible for him to go elsewhere at this point? How long has he known he'd be changing to this new place? -- Could this have been affecting his behaviour / execcerbating his bipolar for a while now? How long till that pdoc appointment now?

(((Diane))) -- this is so hard for you.

Rosie x
Posted 9/19/2006 5:57 AM (GMT 0)
diane,

i'm not a fan of parochial schools, but in mat's case i make an exception and agree with dj.  i believe that a suppotive christian school with a supportive minister might help matt.  for what it's worth, years ago my oldest granddaughter was having behavioral problems.  our daughter sent her to a christian school for a year (i wish it had been longer - but i'm only a grandparent and refuse to tell our daughter how to raise her children).  it helped straighten our granddaughter out.  i can't argue with success.

have you considered home schooling?  i know that it can be very trying, especially with someone like matt, but it may help re-bond the two of you.

i know that this is hard on the two of you.  i wish there were more i could do.  you and matt are uppermost in my thoughts.

warren

Posted 9/19/2006 6:14 AM (GMT 0)
He seemed to have a good day at school, but he didn't really want to talk about it. I wasn't there so I can't tell...I'd love to try to put him back into the Christian school but they can't deal with him. Plus, I lost some income and can't afford it now anyway. It breaks my heart that he's not back at his old school during his senior year. But life goes strangely on.

Thank you everyone for ALL YOUR RESPONSES! This has been a LONG thread! I hope some other parent(s) has benefited from all this good advice and not just me.
Posted 9/25/2006 4:05 PM (GMT 0)
Man, life is hard! Every morning I hear shouting, cussing and door slamming as my ex "Encourages" Matt to take his meds before school. I just hide in my room and tell myself that Matt's dad has gotta do what he's gotta do...The houses next door are really close so I hope they're not too annoyed by all the noise!

The day after tomorrow, FINALLY we get to see the new Pdoc! Also, our Psychologist has gotten cleared to see us twice a week, so that's good.

We're having to drive Matt to school and back now because he keeps getting into fist fights on the bus with the other "emotionally disterbed" kids. He doesn't start them.

It's CRAZY but we're hanging in there. I bought a ton of funny videos/movies ($1 each at video clearance sale) and Matt will actually watch them with us! This seems to be our only positive family time that he'll tolerate.

Dad is struggling to hold it together emotionally himself, he's Schizophrenic but takes his meds. We've had or own heated and wierd moments. BUT I couldn't make it without his help, so I can't complain.
Posted 9/25/2006 8:16 PM (GMT 0)
take the good where ever you can find it.  watching movies together is a far cry from "i hate you!" 

best of luck.

warren

Posted 9/25/2006 9:57 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Diane --

The movies are a *great* idea, and this does sound like some progress. Still sounds like an incredibly frustrating time. -- It's horrible for you to have to go through -- and your ex and indeed your son, who must feel so confused, but with his dad forcing him to take his meds, things are moving in the right direction. And that appointment is so close now!! -- You're being very strong (((Diane))) -- hang in there: this too shall pass.

Rosie x
Posted 9/26/2006 2:31 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Diane

It sounds like yesterday was better than the day before, and today will be better than yesterday. Not giant bounds better, but better.

I pray that tomorrow is better than today.

Cap
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