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My daughter dating a recently UNmedicated Bipolar??? OMG!!

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Posted 3/18/2007 6:04 PM (GMT 0)
Here's a delema for ya! I have a dear friend who is also a single parent with a Bipolar son. The son has been on meds for years and years and the father just recently helped him ween himself OFF meds completely. Which is a good thing because Scott, 19, is now doing great!

Mike, the father my friend, also has a Autistic son, 12, whom my daughters babysits. Scott, the other son could not babysit his brother because (as his father told me) "Scott would kill his brother". (I don't think Mike was speaking literally but who knows for sure!) That was 2 years ago.

Now Scott is much MUCH better, so I'm told. His dad told me that Scott is asking about my daughter Sharon and considering ASKING HER OUT!!! She doesn't know about it. HELP!!!!!!

They're both 19, but my somewhat shy daughter HAS NEVER BEEN OUT ON A DATE!! She has lots of guy friends but she's always concentrated on school (3.6 GPA in a private college prep school) Yes, I know it's up to her but my "mother-bear" instinct is coming out and I feel like a hypocrate. Afterall, my son is Bipolar and I should be more understanding. The trouble is I DO understand!

I'm AFRAID for her to get involved with Scott who has been violent in the past.

Do I tell his dad about my fears and risk OUR friendship?
Oh yeah, he's also an agent of mine and I need the work.

Scared protective A.F.momDiane!
Posted 3/18/2007 7:06 PM (GMT 0)
I got quite confused with all the names there! I can understand why you would be concerned, but like you said, it's up to your daughter- she may not even be interested in the guy. At the end of the day someone with bipolar can be extremely sensitive and inteligent as well as violent and your daughter might see that side of him,who knows? I would't get overly concerned though 'cause you'll never know if it'll be a bad or good thing until it happens,you cant read the future (unless you go manic and become delusional ;) )

I don't think your friend (scotts dad) would end your friendship if you told him of your concerns (if he did then it probably wouldnt be worth the friendship) it's only normal that someone would be concerned for their daughter/son's well being and who they date. So maybe you should explain to him that you're worried about it without going into too much detail? I've never been very good with advice,but let us know how it goes :)

shine_on
Posted 3/18/2007 8:17 PM (GMT 0)
A person with BiPolar needs to be on medication all the time.After awhile the diease rears it's ugly head again if not on medication...................
Posted 3/19/2007 5:29 AM (GMT 0)
My son's girlfriend of 6 months is Bipolar. My son now seems like he is too. He is on pins and needles trying not to react the wrong way to every little thing she does or says. She is extremely smart, but does not have a good support system. Now my son is trying to be that. They are both 18 at the age where they think they know it all. He lives for her without regard to us or even himself. I just hope she does not get pregnant. From what I have read, you only get worse with this condition.
Your daughter sounds like she has her head screwed on right. She should know the truth and make her own choice after she knows about his past.
Sassy
Posted 3/19/2007 6:51 AM (GMT 0)
Man...life is just one soap opera after another! LOL I'm sorry that I confuzed anyone. I'll talk to Mike, the father...

I guess I was just scard. My ex is Schzophrenic (why do they make these darn names SO hard to spell??) and my first thoughts when I met him were "Hey, it's not like I'm gonna marry the guy...what's one date gonna hurt"

Thank you for the good advice! It's so nice to come here!
Posted 3/20/2007 5:36 PM (GMT 0)
I sent Mike, the father, a carefully worded e-mail ( I do better writing as opposed to talking) reminding him of the gentle "scolding" HE gave me about a year ago when when I proudly announced to him that my son was off meds and doing great.

I realise, as I think about it, how hopeful (and tired) he must be to think that Scott, his son, can go on normally w/out the meds... sad. It's been a LONG haul for him as a single dad with 2 disabled adopted kids. He also runs his own business...he's the #1 Magician in the county of S.D.!

Do you think he has something magic up his sleeve??? LOL
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