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My sister is biplor

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Bipolar Disorder
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Posted 10/26/2008 2:40 AM (GMT 0)

smhair  This is a first for me.. I have never been to a chat room in my life and I am amazed there is such a thing. It shows I'm pretty sheltered. My younger  sister was diagnosed with BP with psychotic episodes.This was after my family had to have her pink slipped. I had to go to her home in the middle of the night and take custody of her 5 kids due to her illness... She was out of her mind.  They kept her in the hospital for two months.The kids were with me for a year before DSS let them go back home... then they ended up with me for another 6 months because she stopped taking her meds. They are back with her again....I am so tired of all of this. She just resents me for everything. She is thousands behind in her utilities and blamed me for this. She hasn't paid a bill in years. I told her I would take out a loan for $4,000.00 to pay off her electric bill. But she would have to sign a notarized letter saying she would pay me out of her child support. She flipped and let her power be shut off. It was off for over a week before her doctor wrote a letter to the utility company to have it turned back on. It is only a matter of time before it happens again and she still owes the money. I have done all I can to help. It is hard to just keep getting slammed. The kids are getting older and it is making things even more difficult because they can manipulate her now.  How do I just let go and walk away. I have never felt like I have been depressed but am feeling like very low lately. Is there anyone out there who can give me some advice?

Posted 10/26/2008 4:25 AM (GMT 0)
Hi hersister,

Welcome to HealingWell and to the bipolar board. I hope we can give you a little help.

You are in a tricky situation with your sister. You have to understand that when she makes decisions, she's not always making them with 100% a clear head. She is responsible for her decisions, to some extent, but she has a disorder that distorts reality and makes everything feel much more emotional and impossible than it really is.

You can't be her sole caretaker -- she needs some professional support as well. I assume she sees a doctor and stays on her medical regimen? Does she see a therapist as well? I'd really recommend it. The therapist can help talk her through some of the scarier, more intimidating parts of life -- like paying bills. If it seems like a therapist is out of your price range, most towns have a mental health clinic that charges patients on a sliding scale.

You also could use some professional support to help you learn how to deal most effectively with your sister. I also recommend a book, "The Bipolar Disorder Survival Guide" by David Miklowitz, to help you learn to deal with her bp.

In the meantime, don't offer her a loan. She's already turned it down. Move on, and if she asks for it, let her come to you. She'll figure out the problem is real and deal with it on her ownl
Posted 10/26/2008 5:21 AM (GMT 0)
Thanks for your response. I am hoping she is still seeing her therapist. I have been thinking it may be time for me to go talk to someone. It is funny how things work out...After I wrote earlier I turned on the TV (which I very seldom watch) and there was a Law and Order episode about biplor. Having seen this it made me put things in a little better persective. This is her illness and I don't have to be along for the ride. I will order the book you recommended as soon as I send this.
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