HealingWell
Search Close Search
☰

Feeling impulsive and angry? Speaking without restraint?

Support Forums
>
Bipolar Disorder
✚ New Topic ✚ Reply
❬ ❬ Previous Thread |Next Thread ❭ ❭
Posted 9/25/2010 4:40 AM (GMT 0)
It doesn't take much for me to get "up in arms" about stuff.... When I am managing my life, things can go OK but to be honest, it really doesn't take a whole lot for me to lose a restraint on my mouth. If I feel that someone is questioning my beliefs or disrespecting me, I can easily start acting in a manner which is not considered socially acceptable.

Do any of you BP people deal with this? I can go days, weeks, maybe even months going totally cool...... but it seems that when something or someone "pushes my buttons" or questions me....... that I can easily become VERY confrontational. I feel when a person questions me in a certain way, like if they question my personality or my moral view..... I am ready to give them all of the bad words I have learned.

Has anyone else experienced this with BP? Like you know you should just "be cool" but it is almost impossible to do so? ... Like you just want to rant on them? For me, it's almost an unstoppable urge to tell them how wrong they are and how right I am......... I'm doing a lot better since I realized I do that... but I still feel the urge sometimes.... to just give people the "third degree."

P.S. What makes it worse for me is that I am practically a scholar in the English language.. so I can easily speak logically and use the language at my discretion. But when someone questions me personally ever, it's like a certain button has been pushed and the floodgates have been opened on my mouth.... and Hell has been unleashed.

I have been working very hard to realize when I feel like this and have been doing quite well at restraining myself..... but the urge is almost like a mosquito bite you want to itch but know you shouldn't..... I just want to unleash my barrage of offensive words sometimes.... I guess I should praise myself for not doing it for quite a while. It's like a drug addict who gets the itches though.... I just want to sometimes rant on someone with every word my mother would slap me for................

Post Edited (Archelaus) : 9/24/2010 10:47:40 PM (GMT-6)

Posted 9/25/2010 12:13 PM (GMT 0)

   I know i have a temper, a lack of control as it were.  So i work almost every day to get lots of rest, watch what i eat, and practice control of my temper. Hungry, angry, lonely, tired. A friend once told me these were things that could cause and alcholic to drink. I feel they also work well for BP also. I know i have a temper, a very very bad one. So i work very very very hard to control it. Like a diet of the mind i do not indulge it, even a bit.

   From time to time it does get the better of me, but that is once  a year or so.  Going thru the high stress of my divorce i was able to control myself in what was a very stressfull time. Thanks to all that work i got thru without once losing my temper, despite all my wife did to push my buttons. 2 years ago when we went thru a similar thing, there was violence and destruction on both sides, this time it was only on her side, all that work in control paid  off big time.

   Bill       

Posted 9/25/2010 11:30 PM (GMT 0)
Bill, I forgot about Hungry angry lonely tired - HALT, used for overeaters too.

I often run thru an internal dialogue that would shock people if I verbalized - push my buttons, piss me off, phew. I take a deep breath and tell myself not to make a scene. Later in the day it will continue to run thru my mind more. So, that deep breath is not helping my insides. Then I say, well, that person is an ******, disregard from now on. One lady I did tell her don't say things like that to me anymore please. It worked on her.

I hate uninformed, free advice. Its hard when people say "can't you just ----"
✚ New Topic ✚ Reply