I'm very active with my school's clubs, in this case the school's russian club. So next month the russian club was planning a trip to NYC to go to a russian museum and spend the day as a group in the city.
I invited my boyfriend because I get very scared being in the city and I wanted him there as a source of support.
This is how things changed:
First, we decided that because we have mutual friends who live in the city, my boyfriend and I would meet up with these two friends for coffee and possibly shopping, but we're required to go to the museum first.
Second, my boyfriend let his other (non mutual) friends know he would be in the city. suddenly this girl I don't care for very much is messaging my boyfriend and has convinced him to come to the city a day early and stay overnight and hang out. I was also invited, obviously.
however the problem with this is that I just got recently let go from my job and I am broke. now instead of the trip costing $15 round trip bus sunday morning to sunday night, no museum fee, the trip has become taking the bus into one city to take a bus into new york city, which will cost around $25. then we have to feed ourselves all day saturday and pay for a hotel saturday night. then we have to get up early and meet my russian club at the museum, then we are going to be spending sunday with my boyfriend's friends. one of our mutual friends backed out of the plan because she doesn't want to see the female non mutual friend.
THIRD, the non mutual female friend posts a thread on a forum that my boyfriend posts on and I do not. inviting anyone who is in the area to come hang out with us on saturday. people i don't know. i get nervous and freak out when i am in groups larger than 4 people so obviously this is a problem now that there are potentially 10 or so people coming.
now, the plan is that we get in saturday morning, spend the day with a bunch of people i dont know, then go to a BAR at 11 oclock at night to meet the female friend. first off my biggest problem is i cannot drink at night on my medication and i have to be in bed by 10:30pm anyways.
the whole trip is just spiralling out of control. i asked my boyfriend to reconsider going back to the original plan and we ended up in a fight. now he is probably going to NY on saturday alone and i am going to NY sunday alone.
my feelings are very hurt. the fact that he would rather go to NY alone instead of accommodate me, his long term girlfriend.. it just doesn't make sense to me. we are supposed to be a team and he doesn't care how i feel on the matter at all. he is being selfish saying he never gets a chance to see these people. what i dont understand is he has a job now and can pay for the $30 tickets to get to NYC in less than 3 hours yet he has to choose MY weekend to meet up with all these people. if i didn't have bipolar it would probably be okay but the last "meet up" i attempted to go to i broke down and nearly had a psychotic break in the middle of the city because there were like 20 people there i had never met before and i was very very freaked out and on no medication.
what the heck am i going to do
my boyfriend is being so inconsiderate