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Posted 4/12/2006 6:37 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Everyone,

My husband and have experienced alot of problems lately and we moved back to are home state and he has relasped again.  He wants to get a divorce for the second time and when he gets sick this happens.  The first time he wanted a divorce I left him and shortly after I had to put him in the hospital.  I donot want to leave my husband but he refuse to take his meds. and he is driving me crazy.

Thanks

Chephzibah

Posted 4/12/2006 9:05 PM (GMT 0)
Seems similar to my 36 yr old son. I'd like to help. Is he manic? What are the meds he's supposed to be taking?
Posted 4/12/2006 10:15 PM (GMT 0)
Yes, he is manic.  The meds is Zyprexa.  He is still in denial.  However, today i was so excited because he took his pill without a fight.  This was the first time in a long time he took the pill freely.  Thanks for your response.  Is your son married?

Posted 4/14/2006 11:28 PM (GMT 0)
Sorry I missed your reply here. I think I have an idea of what you're saying and what patience and strength you need.
I'm very happy to hear he was able to take his meds without the usual upsets (I know).
My son is separated, a daughter in Europe he has yet to see (except in photos). No, his wife has already found a new "friend". The problem is really his bipolar..... he was taking Prozac while in College and did so well on that - but he quit taking it the moment he met his future wife (married her in 3 mos .. she left in 1 yr). Anyway, the problem with this illness is definitely the denial which, actually, is a form of laziness (mentally). They get so used to the ups and downs and actually RELY on them, feel safe or at least familiar with the ups and downs. Doesn't make sense to anyone who has never dealt with this form of depression directly or indirectly. They ALWAYS hurt the one they love dearly... not purposefully but because they know... deep down inside ... that they can rely on your forgiveness and understanding.
If you'd like to chat, I'll be happy to meet in one of the rooms (bipolar or depression) on Monday. EM me anytime, I can at least offer a shoulder ([email protected])
I really hope things are better for you both during Easter.
Best Wishes... NAMASTE!
Mary
Posted 4/15/2006 12:34 AM (GMT 0)
Dear Mary,

Thank you for your reply.  Sometimes it get hard to deal with my husband.  Because he go in and out of denial.  He is difficult sometimes.  When problems occur and my husband have a major relaspe he wants to get a divorce and he can be very aggresive so one time I left him and it took me to hositalize him and months of meds to get him back to normal  We have just experienced problems with our kids, move and so many other things he replased again.  He is crying divorce again and I want to leave again but I know he donot mean it and it is not worth me watching him suffer like that again.  But know he is becoming more successful and he has friends who would not give him the time of day before are supporting him leaving me.  But I know they only want to use him and I am trying to be strong.  But it is very humilating and painful.  He is starting to slowly come back to normal but he can still be very hurtful.  I will like to meet with you in the chat room on Monday give me a good time.  I hope all is well with you Mary.  Thank you for caring.  I love my husband and he is so wonderful but my soul hurts really bad right know.

Thanks

Chephzibah

Posted 4/15/2006 3:15 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Chephzibah,  I wanted to welcome you to Healing Well forum.  I am sorry that your going through so much.  I have quite a bit of experience working with people with mental disorders.  Also, my brother and have a close friend that has Bipolar Disorder.  It is very easy to get stressed when your in the type of situation you are in.  For a person who has BP stress is also a trigger for mania, so moving for him was more than likely one trigger.  People with BP are not mentally lazy in anyway, the denial is a normal human reaction that anyone of us would have when faced with a disease or disorder.  People with BP often will stop taking their medications once they have formed a period of stability on them and think that perhaps "everything will be different now" if they quit taking them, if you understand what I mean.  My friend has gone off and on his meds several times and each time he has explained that the reasoning for it was that he felt that he was "cured".  Granted being stable on medication can give the person with BP this feeling.  It is the same with people who have depression and who quit there meds.  I hope that you can hang in there, be strong as you sound that you are.  We are here for you if you do need anything....Take care.  
Posted 4/16/2006 12:49 AM (GMT 0)
Dear Elisha,

Thank you, so much for your encourging words.  I donot believe people with bp is lazy minded.  As a matter of fact my husband is one of the most intellegent people I know.  I believe it is scary for him being such a strong minded man to admit he has a mental illness.  I am slowly showing him that is no different from someone with a physical illness.  He is starting to get better but as you know until he feels safe and comfortable in our new home he will be on edge.  He found out he was bp about 7yrs ago after graduating from law school and returning home to his family and wife.  He relasped lost his first wife, job, friends and family.  He even became homeless.  When we got marry he was so overwhelmed with pain it has taken almost 4yrs. to help him get his confidence back. Keep in mind he has brought so much to my life too.  But I am going to contiune to pray and trust in "YAH" Almight and stay strong.  Thanks again.  I hope to speak with you again.  I hope you are doing well.

Chephzibah  

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