New Here

Hi, my name is Emily. I'm 25 (almost 26) and was diagonsed with Bi-Polar II last night. I'm relieved, hopeful and also scared out of my mind. I have no idea what this journey is going to be like. My Dr is going to be putting me on Lamictal. I hope it helps, I'm living in a depressed hell right now.  How long do medicenes work before they stop working? What kind of life am I going to lead? Will I be able to get married and have children? Why me. Why us.

Hi Emily --

A big welcome to HW from me too! -- I hope that being here and talking through questions and fears helps you. -- It's a great line of support for many, and I hope it's just that for oyu. :)

Getting the diagnosis can be scary, I know, but it's also the herald of a new phase in which it becomes possible for you to manage and control your bp symptoms with meds and therapy, rather than have the bp control you. This is a good time to read up on the condition -- find out about the good that often goes with the bad (bp is often associated with great talent). Have a look at the resources on this forum (and elsewhere on the web), find books, and ask questions here all you like. When you see how great people manage on this board it's often a wonderful reminder that this is not a "life sentence".

All best to you,

Rosie x

Thanks for everyone's responses.

It's been a couple of days since I was diagnosed (although I thought for years I had it) and I'm begining to wrap my mind around what this means for me. And well, it is all very depressing. I can't believe I'm going to have to take medication for the rest of my life or see a dr for the rest of my life. That's no way to live. My mother is in denial over all of this and thinks everything is going to be fine - she can't handle the reality of living wih bipolar disorder. I asked her to read 'The Unquiet Mind' and she wouldnt because it would make her too upset. She thinks she is upset, how does she think I feel? My Dad probably hasn't thought about it at all - he is too busy with his big job. He will just throw money at the problem rather than sit down and try to understand.  I'm kind of alone with this. I called my dr yesterday and she never even called me back.

I could really use a glass of wine. Am I allowed to have a glass of wine or does that exacerbate BPII?

Hi Absolutely Not Alone!

On the plus side, you found us lol!! -- But I know, seems pretty depressing right now. Did you know though, I'm not bipolar myself: I came here to gain insight for helping my ex (things fell to pieces with his bp, but I still care a lot about him). I've seen a lot of ups and downs with his early diagnosis phase, and I've seen him realise that having bp does not make him mad. Just as importantly, I've met all the wonderful people on this board, and I can tell you that, from my point of view, having bp is nothing to be ashamed about or saddened by -- because all I've seen here are strong people full of humanity, wit and care for each other. I feel more at home on this board than anywhere else.

If your mum can't bring herself to read the Jamison (and I know it can be too personal and upsetting for some people -- though a wonderful book), I'd recommed David Miklowitz's "Bipolar Disorder Survival Guide" -- a much more manual-style approach that is the best thing I've read on bipolar and something I feel would benefit any sufferer or relative of a sufferer (and with a great section on sufferer and family/friends denial). If your dad won't engage in any non-monetary way, then separate yourself from that for now. He may realise the error of his ways at some point -- then it's up to him to make amends. Right now, yes, you want to help educate people, but you also need to have people around who will support you.

Maybe have a chat with your doc about the phone call thing next time you see her. I'm sure she'd not want to leave you feeling so cut off and alone: a discussion of what to expect and when if you call could help you in terms of laying out a time-frame for responses so that you don't feel let down if her response is not immediate (and of course she might have been seeing patients late or have been doing duty at a psychiatric hospital). You might also want to agree on what you will do in case of emergencies: will you have some sort of code word for her, or will you use one of the emergency phone lines? etc.

Um, on the wine front ... as a rule, drinking's not advisable with bp because alcohol is a great trigger for mood swings. But to say "no drink ever" is unrealistic for most of us. If you can limit oyurself to a glass every now and then, great. If you think that, what with feeling low already, the temptation might be too much and one glass would become 2 or 3 or 4, then it's definitely better to avoid it. Cranberry juice with tonic water and a big chunk of lime (squeeze it into the drink too) is a really refreshing drink that tastes a bit more exciting than your average non-alcoholic one -- gives you plenty of vitamin C too which helps with how you feel. (Hey, we should start an "alternatives to alcohol" thread!)

Just remember hun, bp is part of you but it is not all of you, and it does not define you. Managed well (e.g. sticking with your meds) you can really control *it*: bp is only a problem when it starts to control *you* -- at those times you have to make sure that you have a good plan of action for getting it back in line again, and your pdoc can help you devise that.

"What does not kill you makes you stronger": I know that this is true -- from my own depression, from the struggles with, and triumphs over, depression (unipolar and bipolar) that I have seen in my friends, and from all the strength, wisdom and humour I witness on this site every day. -- That's the thing to remember.

Rosie x

Hi Imocombe,

Welcome to HW! -- Lovely to have you with us! :)

First off, congratulations on your pregnancy! I know that managing bp with this gets complicated. -- Here is an extract from a book I have:

"There are exceptions to this rule [staying on treatment long-term], such as if a woman wants to become pregnant (mood stabilizers can increase the risk to the fetus of heart and central nervous system defects). In the case of pregnancy, the solution is usually to gradually discontinue medication prior to conception and then reintroduce it later in (or after) the pregnancy, or find a different class of medication rather than stopping altogether... ." (David Miklowitz, "The Bipolar Disorder Survival Guide", p. 102)

You say you have a great therapist; what about your pdoc? Or are they the same? How are you being helped to cope with your bp during the pregnancy? Also, as someone who's also had an eating disorder, I know that this can also be damaging to an unborn child -- are you managing to keep this under control? My thoughts are with you.

I hope you'll find lots of support here hun.

Rosie x

P.S. Do feel free to start your own thread too.