wanting advice and opinios,please

I am new to this. I am excited about the opportunity to share about myself, get opinions and suggestions and offer support to others as well.

I am scheduled for my first surgery on April 22nd for a laminectomy. I have herniated discs L4,L5 and S1. I have been dealing with this for 9 months now. And I simply can't take the pain anymore. I hurt every minute of every day. The back pain is bad enough. But the pain in my left buttock,hip and left leg in what is unbearable. I work fulltime in a pediatric office as a nurse, have 2 children. I go all day with no meds. I can't do my job and be on pain meds,too. I have to work. I walk like my left foot is broken. I have pins and needles in my buttock and foot most of the time. I have cried many of tears,nothing seems to help. I have had 3 epi injections-the last one lasted a total of 11 days. I take percocet,flexiril and elavil. Most of the time, it doesn't help. I want to be able to wake up in the mornings ready to face the day again. Now I wake up with dread knowing what my day will be like before my feet even touch the floor. This has effective every aspect of my life.  I can't play with my children (girl,4 and boy,11) anymore. Relations with my husband are almost nonexistent. Shopping for groceries even, I have had to almost stop. When I call my patients back to the exam room and they get there before me, it is  just embarassing as well as humiliating. I am scarred to have the surgery. The what ifs have almost sent me into panic attacks. I always said that back surgery is one that I would never have. I have heard too many times that a person never just has one back surgery. I want my life back. I am tired of the pain and the depression that goes along with it. Also, my husband also takes the percocet. I live in the fear that I will be without. I sleep with them in my pillowcase so I won't be without. It is just a bad situation all the way around.

I am sorry this is so long and drawn out. i would like your opinions on this surgery coming up in 18 days. I am open to suggestions. Thank you so much for reading this.

Anice

Anice,
I want to welcome you, but am sad to learn of all you're facing. Right now I'm not feeling too well, so I can't write much.

I had a lumbar fusion L4-S1 about a year and a half ago. Mostly because of pain down my right buttock, leg and numbness/tingling in both feet. Unfortunately, it didn't help. I'm almomst 60, though, so DDD plays a role. I get a sense you might be younger.

You're a nurse so you probably know all about 2nd opinions - did you get one for the surgery? You sound unsure. Surgery is not to be taken lightly, and you know that, but it also might be good not to wait until you have long term nerve damage. Did you try any other modalities like PT? I have found a lot (not all) of my right buttock pain is related to an SI joint that won't stay in place.

Anyway, make sure you feel comfortable with your neurosurgeon, and you still have 2 weeks if you feel you need a 2nd opinion. There may be time to get one.

Your husband and the percocet is another issue, and you're a nurse so you know it's not ok.

Like Becoming asked - what supports and resources do you have?

We're here and will help in whatever ways we can.

PaLady

 

Just know that you are not alone..I,too have had a Lamenectomy (L3,L4) in 1999, and Spinal Fusion (L3,L4,L5,S1) about 3 years ago.  I'm not sure how true it is, but I think it's pretty accurate that people usually have more then one surgery.. I wish I had waited on the fusion, then maybe I would have other options right now...like Disc Replacement..instead of having to take all these pain meds.. (ohhhh,that would be nice!)

 

And, another thing we have in common is that I had (not anymore) friends that would steal my medication and leave me in pain without a thing to take... It happens sometimes. But why do u let your husband take yours? I understand he might make you feel bad if he's in pain, but have him go to a Pain Management Clinic like the rest of us...He should think about YOU for a change..

 

Sorry, but I know what it's like to go without because of others.

I was pleasantly surprised by how easy the Lamenectomy was...I was up that next day.  Of course it's much better now!! They do it outpatient surgery and you go home that day.  The pain wasn't that bad either.. So, don't panic just because you don't know what to expect...

 

Good Luck with the surgery and hopefully it will take care of the pain in your butt (and I don't mean your hubby) ha ha ha

 

Me.

Hello

Hopefully the surgery will mean you need less meds, and perhaps you will do extremely well and be off all your meds altogether. It's certainly true that there are people who don't get much relief from this sort of surgery, but remember that these are the people you're going to hear from - the people who do well simply move on with their lives and we often don't hear from them. This is worth remembering.

I agree with the above posts; your husband shouldn't be snagging your meds. If he has pain issues himself, then he'd be well-advised to seek a medical opinion. In the meantime, you need to take steps to safeguard your meds, and I would suggest a locked box; if your husband looks insulted at this move, you can simply tell him that it's a requirement of your doctor's new drug contract (many doctors have patients sign these and some request patients to keep their meds in locked boxes for exactly this reason, as well as to keep them away from children, and to help prevent theft in the case of a break-in).

In the meantime - and this is perhaps a bit sneaky - you might consider switching out your percocet into a different bottle, and replacing it with regular tylenol, if you can find a generic brand that looks the same. I did this once when I suspected someone was dipping into my meds, and discovered that there were always some gone after my cleaning person had been. I bet your husband will lose interest in the new "percocet" when he discovers he isn't getting much of a buzz off them. Still, it's a shame that it's come to this. If he openly admits to taking them, then it's worth discussing this with him. It may be that he has addiction issues, and needs help himself. At any rate, this kind of behaviour is only going to erode the trust in your relationship (if it hasn't already).

If you end up needing meds even after the surgery, you may want to ask your doctor about the possibility of switching to a longer-acting formulation. The reason you feel you aren't able to take meds at work is because you don't take them regularly. A low-dose, long-acting opioid taken perhaps twice a day, may be a better choice than gritting your teeth and suffering through the day and then medicating only "after-work" - because you don't take meds regularly, you may not be aware that the spaced-out "stoned feeling" we associate with opioid therapy disappears with regular use. Opioid therapy gets a bad rap, but it's worth remembering that, far from preventing people from doing their jobs, these medications often allow people to return to work and to live productive and satisfying lives. Again, it's the horror stories we tend to hear of, not the successful ones.

Certainly, I'm not suggesting that you take more meds if you don't need them - what I'm suggesting here is that you find a way to get through your day without a level of pain you find debilitating. How you do that is up to you, but there's no mileage in suffering if it's at all avoidable. Once your body acclimates to regular meds (it does this rather quickly) you are likely to find that it doesn't interfere with your ability to do your job. This has certainly been my experience, and the experience of other pain patients I've known.

I am a physician myself on low-dose, long-acting opioid therapy for an inflammatory arthritis, and it doesn't affect my skills or clinical judgment at all. In fact, it was the medication that allowed me to return to work after a painful 10-month hiatus off work a few years back. Like you, I was initially reluctant to take opioids on a regular basis - as a nurse and physician, you and I both know the stigma of these drugs only too well - but in my case, they've done exactly what they're intended to do - they've managed my pain and given me my life and livelihood back (and believe me, with $150k in med school loans, I could ill-afford to not-work)! Of course we hope the surgery will obviate the need for all this in your case - but it's worth knowing their are still options should the pain persist.

Best of luck with your surgery. Positive thoughts going in - we always anticipate the worst, as though that will somehow steel us against disaster; how about anticipating the best for a change? A future with less pain and more mobility... and your husband having to find his drug-of-choice somewhere else! Cheers to that!

Welcome Figlet!
Glad to have you join us. I totally agree with the idea of the lock box. They are available through pharmacies and mail order companies. You can carry the key around your neck if need be to protect your meds from your husband.
I also agree with Figlet. Once you are on a stable dose of pain meds, the "fogginess" that comes with some of them seems to go away and you don't experience the constant highs and lows that come with taking short acting meds. It may be something to consider and allow you to return to work and not be in so much pain that you can't function at the end of the day.
Long acting meds don't seem to cause that fogginess that comes with shorter acting meds either. Some of them are supposed to last for 8-12 hours and one of them for 24, so it is something to consider discussing with your PM at your next visit. Especially if he thinks that you may be on pain meds for some time. Much easier to function on the long acting ones than short acting.
Anyway good luck to you. read Figlet's post again and again, he posted some really great advise for you.
Sandi

Fatherjohn,
It's interesting how much help you needed after your surgery. I'm not "dissing" that by any means, but because I live alone I had little choice. I spent 6 days in the hospital after my fusion, and my cousin drove me home (a 3 hour drive from the hospital), set up my high hat toilet seat and shower chair, made sure I was comfortable, and left. I managed alone, with the help of my cousin bringing me things, and the community nurses. Thank goodness I had the cane next to my bed, though, as it was a real challenge to get up to go to the bathroom during the middle of the night when I was on so many meds! I nearly fell the first night, but afterwards took more care.

I guess part of it is in what we learn to expect. Those of us who live alone and don't have other options learn to somehow figure it out. It takes a lot of advance planning, though, and the health care system as it exists is not very good with helping with that aspect. Everyone tells you to wait until after discharge, but when you're alone you can't!

All of this is to say to Anice it may vary. If you're having a minimally invasive approach, it certainly won't be as bad. But that doesn't mean you can push your recovery time. I also was told 6 weeks, which was a joke! I barely sat in my car after 6 weeks, and it took me 3 months to get back working even part time. So expect a longer recovery time than what you're told, and take care to let yourself heal properly so you can get the most from your surgery.

I hope my earlier post didn't add to your anxiety. When I suggested a 2nd opinion it was to help you decrease your anxiety, but if you're sure of your decision, you've done your homework and know it's your only shot at decreasing or maybe eliminating the pain, then relax and go for it. Even though my back surgery failed, I often asked myself if I regret having it. And the answer is no. Because I would have always wondered if it would have helped, and my back was just getting worse anyway, so I like to think the fusion maybe has helped stabilize it in some way. And like fatherjohn, I probably waited too long and the nerve damage was irreversible. So you're better off going at the 9 month mark than waiting years. I think I remember reading in some of the research (of course after I had waited!) that if conservative measures don't work in 6 months it's better to look at surgical options before the nerves are damaged.

I wish you all the best and hope to hear a success story from you after your surgery!

PaLady

Wanted to wish you well on your surgery.
Hope everything goes good and that you get some much need pain relief!
lots and lots of soft hugz....