Life is calming down

Greetings CP family and friends. It has been a long 2 weeks and it is starting to calm down some. As some know, my son was on his way to Iraq. He has a young lady friend and they thought about getting married before he left and decided to wait. After he left, she finds herself in a pregnant state. Dad not pleased, mom really not pleased. Son's girlfrined has medical problem and ends up in the ER. She loses the baby and they think she has cervicle cancer. Our son was not able to handle the issues being confinded to a base waiting to catch a flight tom Iraq. The Army notices he is not in the right mind and try counseling him. He wants dad's counsel. I was on the phone constantly for days. I had to stop class several times to take calls. The girlfriend has no insurance so them getting married could help as the Army would take care of the medical issues. The Drs decided it is not cancer but pre-cancer and tumors on the ovaries. Her family was not helping her so it was a mess. My son is now home for the weekend and then heads back to catch a flight overseas and onto Iraq. The young couple is doing better and realize that they need more time. The wedding will wait until he returns and we will see about medical costs and now have a young lady joining our family.  

This happened as several instructors took a week off for personal things and I had to step in to teach their classes. The other demands at work were getting to the point that I told my wife I quit the other night. The next morning I got up and told her that I still felt like quitting but did the right thing and went to work. No more about work. The stress has brought the Cp back to levels that are not enjoyable. There is no one to blame and life goes on. When they broke into my car they stole my cane as well as other things. That is pretty low. A mans cane! Now I drive around town looking for someone walking with a cane, wearing my sun glasses and trying to follow the GPS unit that used to be in the car. When I find the person, I will pick them up and take them to one of our drug rehab centers  where they probably belong. 

Anice, the saying stands as stated. How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time. Just watch which end you start at. I hear elephant ears are good compared to the other end.

Here was I imagining that you were having a lovely time farewelling your son, not going through a tornado of emotional issues and without the use of your trusty cane and GPS unit!!! Life can throw it all at you some times. I hope your son's girlfriend is ok, is she booked in for surgery? I hope they manage to get rid of the tumours without having to take both ovaries. Tough when you're so young... You are very good people to offer her such support.

Best wishes to you, golitho

Hey Buddy, They say when it rains, it pours but in your case, it's a frikin-frakin monsoon! So sorry to hear all you've been going through.  I hope that young lady knows how lucky she is (w/ all her bad luck) to have found a caring family like yours! It sounds like she comes from one that isn't very understanding. I hope she will be OK but I know she couldn't be in better hands! I often think about you and how you manage to keep up w/ all the stress of your job managing the constant pain in your body. When does it finally become too much to handle? I hit my breaking point and cashed it in and my stress was nothing compared to yours!! You said you talked to your wife about quitting, I understand that feeling completely and pray that you make the right descision. You are like the Rocky Marciano of our family here, no matter how many times you get hit or how hard, you just refuse to go down! I just can't tell you how much I admire and respect you for that! I'm really glad they let your son get matters under control before he left, it would have been awful if he had to leave w/ all that weighing on his mind. So those jokers stole your cane? Lower than a rattlesnakes belly! I'd have been hellbent on finding the rascle who took it and giving then a hard lesson w/ the biz end of the cane! Thats the difference between me and you> you would want to help him and take him under your wing, I would want to beat some sense into him> like that would do any good??? 

Well friend, I hope you get some rest, you certanly deserve it. I'll write you more later dear friend.

Hang in there, prayers and manhugs comin atcha!!

Pete 

 

 

   Dear Father John,

 

     Good morning *huggs* I am glad you stopped by! I had been wondering for quite sometime now how you were and what was going on.

 

     I am so sorry for your Daughter in laws illness (jumping the gun calling her DIL? is so tell me!) I had many cysts removed from my female organs while I was pregnant with my oldest daughter.  For some reason I had to wait until I was 4months along thou. I was so scared! But once they were removed and biopsied , etc. I never had to have the procedure done again. The coolest part was they made a small incision on the top of belly button and in just a few months time, no one even noticed. Gosh, bless her heart. She needs support! I am glad I do not know her parents, or id give em a commin up ins! *Harrumph* Your son must be worried sick!

 

      Stole you cane?! Thats just sick    Ugh, that takes a special kind of stupid to do something that low.  

 

       Were you ever able to attain the extra funding for the school? You need an assistant now more than ever!

 

*huggs*

   dani

FatherJohn, Wow you and your family have really been through alot in the past couple weeks. That was so much to deal with all at once like that. But that is usually how it happens,isn't it? Thank you for sharing it with us. I know it is personal and all. But you know we all care and respect you very very much. You have been in our thoughts, that's for sure. I am sorry about your sons' girlfriend and about her losing the baby and now having medical problems... I am glad she has your son and your family to help her since her own family hasn't been there for her.

As things seem to settle a little, I do hope your pain level will lessen some. You have been under so much stress it is no wonder your pain has increased. Please try to take some time for yourself and do something for you. You have so much on your shoulders, you do need to do something to help relax and rejuvinate. Please do this for yourself. You are in helping profession. You listen to problems and deal with so much from your students. And you help all of us here on this forum with all our problems giving so much guidance and support. And then your own family problems...You deserve some down time of your own,FatherJohn.
Anice

Greetings, The hopefully daugther-in-law will have her own place. My son has given me power of attorney so I can act in his behalf in financial matters. The young lady works and my son will be helping her financially. She comes to our house to visit and she goes to church with us. I will be able to hopefully help both of them even during their long distant relationship.

PAlady, Medicaid is closed in Oregon (out of money) and the only ones accepted are children and the elderly (it is possible that pregnant womrn can as well). 

Jag, no problem, we need to keep a since of humor. My son will leave monday and fly to Irag on Tuesday. He says he is ready. He has been in a holding patern long enough.

Pete, I did not say that my first thought was to help the person if I caught them. Know what I mean?

Anice, I am trying to take part of today off. I went in the office this morning and have to head back in to do a couple things. Hopefully the phone will let up this afternoon. I am flying to Arizona again next weekend and will be taking my daughter with me. My wife decided she would stay home and work and send my daughter in her place to keep me out of trouble.

Dani & Golitho, she will be doing some follow-up and we will see what they are going to do. This was a blessing in a way as she might not have known for some time if all this did not happen.

Tina and Char, thanks for the thoughts and prayers. Our kids are very close to us as they have no gradparents, cousins or aunts and uncles that we are in touch with. Our parents are gone and my wife was an only child. My family is not close and there is little contact so we try and stay close to our kids, all three are over 18.

Thanks for all the concern and I know that as a CP family we support each other through all kinds of things. This place is a blessing.

Hey FatherJohn,
I certainly add my support to the others that have expressed so for the issues both physically and mentally you have had to endure these past few weeks! I have found, and I am sure you will see, that one of the best medicines is making a post to this board and then the rewards of what is replied. I would feel silly trying to name all or any of the contributors to my posts. Just know htat this is a caring community and our shoulders are here for you.

N8

PAlady, I believe we have one of the worst public health systems in the country. Medicaid has been closed for several years. Last year they added 1500 people and it was by lotery. Thousands plced application and they drew names. Since then it has been closed again. I tell my students that the best thing they can do is not get sick. I had one in the ER this week as he thought he had menengitis, thankfully it was not. He has had it 4 times in his life. That adds stress to overseeing a residential program. The hospital has worked well with us. I am able to submit a request explaining the school and the students income and they have wiped most major claims off.

N8, I still think of my son every time I see that, I find it hard to post sometimes as I am normally on the giving end and don't like to make things about me. It is humbling at times when people respond and are so generous, kind and compassionate.

Skeye, I would like to take the weekend off but I have to work at least part of tomorrow and Sunday. Until I can hire, I am the only salaried person so when someone reached their max hours, that means I get to pick up the slack. I have to travel to California in October to meet with possible donors who are interested in helping with finances. It is tight and our phones were shut off because funds were not there to pay the bill. No stress there. I just change the type of stress by moving from 1 location to another.

PAlady, not to get political but we protect owls and trees more than we do our people. We are hoping that as they build the new medical school here, that we will have access to a higher level of medical care in the community. They have started and are building part of it but not sure when it is to be finished. Hope you are having a good day. I have overdone it again and paying the price. Thats life and we just leran to live with it. If I win the lottery tonight, I will buy a place for people with CP to live and support each other. The only problem is I never buy a ticket so winning could be slim.

Sounds like a game of "musical stress!" Who wants to join in?

Skeye

Hope you have a better week Fatherjohn. You sure have a lot on your plate!!!
Take care of yourself, because you are important.
Hugs
Suzane

Fatherjohn,
Your life doesn't just "seem" to be hectic - it really is! It's not your imagination! LOL

I wonder if you tell people at all those presentations you give what your job is REALLY like???

BTW you can water the plastic plants. I will buy them. ;-)

PaLady