question about chronic pain and adopting

On something like this your best bet really is to talk to someone in your area who is very familiar with adoption requirements and processes. There are really too many variables for anyone to give you a good answer. Laws and requirements vary from state to state and country to country.

Generally speaking however I think you would have a better chance at adopting an older child rather than an infant since infants require the most direct physical care, but like I already said you really need to talk to someone who is a pro in this.

I got married for the first time when I was 22 and my husband and I tried to have a baby for 5 years. When nothing happened, we went to a fertility specialist, who told me I was infertile and would never be able to have my own baby. We then looked into adoption. We were not eligible to adopt due to my medical problems (at the time, I was only dealing with migraines, endometriosis pain, and DDD in my lower back). After divorcing my husband (for other reasons, not the baby thing), I eventually met and married my current husband. At the age of 32, to my surprise, I got pregnant with my son. I had to go off all pain meds which was no picnic let me tell you. But the moment I held him in my arms, it was all worth it! He is 2 now, and the center of my world!

This is just my experience. It could be different for you. Maybe being pregnant and having your own child wouldn't be as bad as you think? I don't know all of your circumstances, so please think of everything before making any decision. If you really want to adopt, there are adoption lawyers out there (probably in the yellow pages locally) that you could call and ask. They are happy to give free advice, and let you know what the prerequisites are for adoption. Also, talk to your doctor about your thoughts and fears. He/she may have some new suggestions you haven't thought of! Good luck with everything! I know what it's like to want to be a mommy really badly. Email me anytime if you need to talk hon!

Take care!

Tammy

Hi. I was on pain medication during my last two pregnancies, although at a lower dosage than pre-pregnancy. Now, this is only my story and I am not saying it is ok for anyone else - that decision is between you and your doctor. I am only telling you so that you know of one success story. Mine were high-risk pregnancies (not just because of the pain, but other medical issues as well) and I had great doctors working with me. The risk of my chronic, severe pain was higher than the risk of the pain medications. I used other forms of pain relief also, and tapered down on the meds in the last weeks of my pregnancy. Neither of my boys (born by c-section) had any breathing difficulties, nor showed any signs of drug dependence (tremors, fussiness, etc.). They are now 16 and 11, healthy and normal. For what it's worth, I was also on an antidepressent during my pregnancies. In my case, the benefits of medication far outweighed the risks. I hesitated about writing about this, because some people have judged me for taking medication while I was pregnant. But for me and my sons, it was the best decision. Then again, I had wonderful doctors and I did alot of research. Good luck to you, whatever you decide!