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Posted 1/16/2011 4:52 PM (GMT 0)
So sorry I've been amoung the missing in action for so long! I've been going crazier than I already am lately and have so many things going on right now I don't know where to start!

First let me say that as of today, I am trying to quit smoking! I joined up w/ Quit Florida a while ago and today is the "Quit Day" I've been long awaiting. They sent me free patches and I have a "Quit Coach" I can call anytime! So far I haven't had a cig but evan w/ the patch, I'm jonesing consiterably! My biggest fear is that I'm gonna gain 20+lbs like I have ever other time I've quit over the last 35 years and then have a heart attack!!! I just can't aford to gain that much now as I'm already way too heavy!!!

I had my sleep apnea test done two weeks ago and have a dr. apt. tomorrow to see how I made out. I'm not so sure what will happen w/ that but I'm pretty sure they will want me to buy (I can't afford it) and wear a mask thing at night evan if I don't have serious apnea cause they are in the biz of selling those things and in my experiance> Most Dr's are greedy!!!!!!!

My wif bought 68 bails of hay yesterday which somehow we loaded and unloaded from the horse trailer. I so wish there was an EZ'er way but to get the right price (which we can't aford anyway) we have to go get it. Needless to say, I am in total body shut down today! Everything that can hurt does w/ my sopecial little friends like lower back, neck & hands which are pushing the redline of the pain scale!! How could I tell her I can't do it?? She works> I don't! I have to carry my weight somehow!

I just found out that both my Boys (who are in the Navy) are going on deployment to the Middle East this year> Oh SHAT!!!!! Joe from the Pacifac & Pete Jr. from the Atlantic! I'm wondering if they will some how port at the same place while half way across the world??? I just wish they were going somewhere> anywhere else besides there!!!! I get so scared when they are over there!!!!!

On the SSD front, I just found out this week that my lawer (a nationally known one) really screwed me!!! They never got the Dr's records a year ago that I PAID for them to get from the two Dr's that ment the most to my case!!! I evan tracked down who had my records when my primary care dr's office closed down and TOLD them where they were!!! I could have very well won my case already w/ these records!!!Something else that they should have done! They have done NOTHING for me except to stretch out my case as long as they possably could so they could get a bigger pay check!!! It's a CRIME what they did to me!!! I evan asked them many times if I could come in  to see my records to make sure we aare on the same page and they said NO that isn't possable!!! I have been switched to at least 5 different girls, each dumber then the last who just shuffel, burry and lose my papers!! I have no chance of winning unless I swich lawers or do it myself!!! I'm so pissed off I can't evan say! This may cost me my 30 year marrage in the end if I don't win this thing soon! I just don't know what to do now!!! I'm too depressed to think about it!

I am at the end of my rope, I am going to try to see a shrink ASAP cause I'm about to explode or go totally off the deep end!!!

So So sorry that I haven't been a contributing member for so long then as soon as I need help, here I am crying for it again!

Think I'll go have a good cry and maybe a cig? What a time to quit!!!

I hate myself!!! I hate whats happened to me!!! How did I end up here??

Love & Hugs,

Pittyfull Pete 

Posted 1/16/2011 5:33 PM (GMT 0)
Hey Bro , Good job trying to quit smokin' man ! Sorry about the SSD thing thats really sucks Pete . But your not pitiful by any means bro , you do more in a day then I do in a month !!! The sleeping thing is rough , hang in there bro , you can do anything you put your mind to . You've got family and friends that love you , remember that Pete . I know its frustrating but you'll get thru this , we're all here for you , keep the faith brother . Your Buddy , Mikel
Posted 1/16/2011 6:29 PM (GMT 0)

Oh wow Petey, you have so much going on. First please don't worry about only coming here needing help. Many of us are in the same boat. I often cannot help others when i am feeling so low. I commend you on the trying to quit smoking. That is fabulous. I like the idea of the group you joined and having someone you can call when you are feeling vulnerable. If you are worried about gaining weight, i would suggest sucking on candies, or always have some fruit and vegetables on hand when you are having one of those moments. But you are always busy so it may be easier than you think. Your wife quit when she had her surgery right? so she can give you a hand to say on the right track.Let me know what the results are on your sleep test. So sorry about your disability problems. I wish I could help you but i have no advice in this area. Hopefully someone will come along with some ideas for you. Oh boy, this is a big worry for your boys. do you know when and exactly where. gosh i would be a basket case. Please keep me up to date on this buddy.

Well what we both need is a little holiday and it won't be long now. i can't wait to meet you Petey. hang in there and take it one day at a time.

Send me an email in a few days as to how you are doing.

Big hugs Petey

Posted 1/16/2011 11:03 PM (GMT 0)
Pete, I am sorry that you are struggling right now but you are strong enough to make this OK. Take a deep breath or two or three or .... and remember you can deal with all this one step at a time and we are always here to help cheer you on. (((((Pete)))))

Lee
Posted 1/16/2011 11:53 PM (GMT 0)
Dear Pete,

I am so glad to hear from you and don't you ever worry about whining!! I wish you the very best luck quitting smoking!!! That is something that I need to do, myself! I just don't know if I can right now!! I am praying that everything goes well for your boys! God bless them! Take care of you!

Hugs,
Beckey
Posted 1/17/2011 12:23 AM (GMT 0)
Pete,
we are here with you in support of your efforts to quitting smoking...Wow, it'll
be hard but I believe you can do it. and I congratulate you on trying to do
something so hard, give yourself a soft pat on the back.
Now, there are many lawyers out there go get a new one, maybe ask for a free consult
first and then go from there, with a new lawyer...Just don't give up on this either, it
will be worth it, so continue, Straydog/Susie can help out better with that...
Well wishes, healing hugz and prayers to you, my friend, ya know we are thinking of you.
(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((Pete))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
Posted 1/17/2011 6:08 AM (GMT 0)
Thank You so much my dear friends! I just knew some of Y'all would reply evan though I really don't deserve good friends like you as I feel like I only come around anymore when I need help and that ain't right!

It was a rough day today w/o cigs but I sorta made it. No lit cigs but I did puff on my elecronic cig a couple times. When my quit line coach called today, I asked her if it was ok and she said that since they are not FDA aproved, she couldn't say yes or no. They do advocate nicotine lozengers or gum w/ the patch when cravings get bad and thats something the never did before!! She told me and I also read in all the literature they sent me that using the patch backed up w/ lozegers or gum give you about the same chance of success as Chantrics does, I didn't know that!

Mikel, you are a good friend and I can't thank you evough for the words of encouragement but I am pretty pittyful Bro, I think this post proves it!!! You are special!!! Thanks for being my friend!!

Suzane my dear friend, I know that if there was anything you could do for me, you would w/ out giving it a second thought! Thats just the kind of person and friend you are!!! Bless you Suz! I can't wait to meet you, your Hubby Red and the rest of the gang very soon!!! I'm gonna be better by then, I promiss! I just hope the no smoking is still going when you get here!

Paula, WOW! You sound like you know a lot about quiting! Thanks so much for the great ideas! I know that everything you wrote will be a help! about SSD, I just don't want to talk about that again right now and get all worked up> (Had tears this a.m. writing about it!) It's not worth it right before bed! Thanks for everything in your long post! It's so nice to know that some peeps like you really do care!!! Your an Angel!!! 

Lee, I will try the deep breathing for sure!!! You say it's one step at a time but in realitty it's more like one breath at a time> Yikes!!! I do want a cig really bad right now and my wife is asleep and I could go smoke one right now! No one would know but me, but thats the problem> I would know!!! Bless you and thanks so much for posting!! It means the world to me!!!

Hi Becky!!! You will quit when it's your time! I can't believe I haven't smoked all day, it seems so sureal! I almost felt stoned all day today! Maybe the patches reacted w/ some of my meds somehow?? It's been such a strange day. I'll say that evan though it's only been a day, the patches are much better than quitting cold turkey! Last time I quit C~T I banged my head against the wall till it was bleeding!! No blood this time YET??? Thanks again Becky my Dear Friend!!!

Chart, what can I say? You have always been there for me!!! I feel like I know you, like we are old friends evan though we never met!!! I wish I could reach around and give myself a pat but I'm too fat! Maybe I'll use my little bamboo hand back scratcher w/ the long handle! I think I have one of those things in every room for the dreaded back itchies! I just don't know about a new lawyer now w/ all the fees and penalties I probably signed! They have me by my male reproduction system! You are a true friend Chart> God Bless You!!!

Hope I didn't forget anyone?

I Love Yuze Gize!!!

Big Huggies to all!

little Pete!

 

Post Edited (Pete trips again!) : 1/17/2011 5:26:12 AM (GMT-7)

Posted 1/17/2011 3:17 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Pete! I'm sorry that you're going through so much, but I'm happy that you posted and I just wanted to say that you will get through this! That's wonderful that you're quitting. I know that it can be the hardest thing to do, but they say that it takes more than a few times quitting to actually quit for good, so you are on the right track!

Hugs,

Flower
Posted 1/17/2011 4:28 PM (GMT 0)
Awww Pete, I am so sorry to hear that you are dealing with so much right now. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers that things will start looking up for you. Love ya lots!
Posted 1/17/2011 8:16 PM (GMT 0)

Gosh Pete!

     You sure do have a lot on your plate. I hope your boys will be safe. We will say extra prayers for them each evening. They are smart and strong. You raised them well and worked very hard to do the best you could! I know they be strong leaders and make good decisions while deployed. *hugg*

     Gosh... that lawyer. After the mess he caused last year? To find out they did absolutely nothing since then?? What a mess. You went through all that running around last summer. Frankly, doing their job for them. Everything was ready to go! And now this???? Something has to be done. They need to be reported. Do they even have all the records on file that you drove all over heck and back to get? If so, take em. It might be time to go pro se or find a new lawyer. It would be good if you could find a way to legally get their sticky fingers out of your SS$ pie too. What a mess. To think ALL this time they did nothing? Nothing! You all but filed the papers for them!

     Well, I should probably say something like "take it easy" or "rest up!". But... instead I will say pace yourself as much as you can. I know you have a lot of work on your plate but try to space it all out. Hang in there and know you are in our hearts!

Lots of Love,
      Henson Family

Posted 1/18/2011 8:17 PM (GMT 0)
Pete you do have the right to fire this atty. He will have to send SS a detailed itemized list of the work he has done on your claim and keep in mind SS has their own guidelines he has to follow for this work. Meaning SS will only allow so much time spent to review the file, complete and return forms, write letters to various medical providers, phone calls made and ect. This is controlled by SS not the atty. His time int he file has to match with what SS has in their file. SS will approve x amount dollars for time actually spent on the file and pay him out of any back pay benefits if the claim is awarded favorably. The atty has to prove up his work on the claim he cannot just send a letter saying I spent x amount of hours at the rate of whatever an hour and be paid, it does not work that way, he has to prove to them he did the work. Any chance of you finding this office that was keeping the medical records for the dr you were talking about. Did you say you gave the atty money to pay for copies of these medical records? Did the atty refund you the fees for the records?

I hope you have better luck with a new atty this one stinks. The big tv guide attys are not worth shooting, their game is in volume, its a numbers game to them.
Posted 1/19/2011 1:20 AM (GMT 0)
Oh Thank You so Flower, Shannon, The Henson Family and Sus!!! Y'all are teriffic friends!!! Too kind to respond to lil old me! Well, not so little!
So it's Tuesday night and I'm still not smoking although my system is full of nicotine from the patch, lozengers, gum and my metal cig that takes a nicotine cartrage and sends it in your lungs w/ water vapor. So first let me stop the smoking then I'll taper off the drug just like we do w/ narcotics! Taper off baby! I only hope I make it that far! The patches go for 30 days at 21 mgs then I switch to the next lower size, I forget what size it is. I forget everything these days but at least now I know why> Sleep apnea! Well I started another post about that though! I really thought I was either really brain burnt from my younger days or having early alzhimers cause my memory is just horable!!! The sleep/pulmonary doc says its from apnea and not sleeping worth a turd!
So I just got back from the pharmacy again after seeing my primary doc today for a sore throat. He said he has seen what I have a awful lot this past week and I should feel terable! I told him I guess I must be too tired to notice and told him about the results from my S/A test. He said "You could have a heart attack!! then gave me a script for a Z-Pack (antibiotics) and said he wouldn't be surprised if I wake up sick tonight or tomorrow before they have a chance to kick in! Jeeze, I'm glad I went today> I hate being sick, I don't have time for it!
On the SSD front, I haven't calmed down enough to do anything about it yet! S/D> Do you think I should contact a new attorny, call the No good for Shat one who screwed me over or call SS and try to explain whats happened to me??????? Yes, I paid them (the lawyer) $$$ to give to my old drs over a year ago for the records they were going to get!!! I evan gave them the phone # to the new office that opened after mine closed down who had my old records!!! The just did nothing and let my first two judgements go against me! I guess all they had was the paperwork I filled out stating everything that was wrong w/ me, all my day to day activities, over 20 typed pages of crap I wrote for them w/ NO DR'S RECORDS to back me up!!! Of course I was denied, who could blame SS!!! I can't write about this anymore as my heart is racing and I want a cig way too badly! Sorry, I'll try again later!
THANK Y'ALL again for all your kind words!!!
Love You All!!!
Pete
Posted 1/19/2011 7:02 PM (GMT 0)
Pete you are not suppose to use the patches and the E cigarette at the same time. You are ODing on nicotine, you will have to give up one of them or risk a heart attack.

Wil talk to later about the SS atty. A phone to SS will do no good.
Posted 1/20/2011 1:57 AM (GMT 0)
Pete,
Hang in there my friend, you can go without the cig's
I'm rooting for you, know you can do it. It will happen...
Lots of support for you...Try concentrating on finding a
better lawyer, you can still go through with your SS case,
you have the right to appeal...
((((((((((((((((((((((((Pete))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
keep us posted as to how your doing..K, healing hugz
Posted 1/20/2011 4:07 AM (GMT 0)
No nicotine overdoses Straydog! I Have been coached by the Florida Quit Line who sent me the patches for free! The advocate using patches and gum or lozengas now, never did before! They say that using both helps a lot when you get a bad urge like w/ coffee or getting in the car! They don't advocate the mechanical cigs because they haven't been tested by the FDA but those things give you very little nicotine at all, much less than the 4 mg gum! I don't use it much as I can only feel the first drag I inhale anyway!! Don't worry, I'm not going to overdose! I might have a heart attack while sleeping from sleep apnea but not from nicotine! I can't believe I'm going on 4 days already and not totally freaking out like I did every time I tried cold turkey!!!
Thanks for thinking about me and posting Chart & Stray!!!!!!
I Love Yuze Gize!!!
Peckerwood Pete
Posted 1/20/2011 7:09 PM (GMT 0)
Ok, as long as you are not in overdrive on the nicotine.

As far as SSD thing goes I already told you what the atty has to do to get any fees for work done on your claim if you fire him. If you decide to fire him you must put it it writing and also a copy of the same letter must be sent to SS office. Be sure to reference your full name & SS number on this letter, this is how SS identifies you. Ethically another atty is not suppose to talk to you if you have an atty on record. I would not go to a hearing without an atty ever!!! If you decide to can him & hire another atty I do hope you will stay away from the tv guide attys, they are not worth shooting ever!!! Those guys with the big ads, mean nothing, they deal with high volumes its a number game, they have no clue who their clients are. Stick with someone local in your area that deals with SS only, stay away from jack of all trades and master of none, they are worthless too.

Any chance of getting a hold of this office that was keeping the old PCP's records? May try to find them again they will probably know where your records are and how to go about getting them. I would make some calls on this if I were you and see what you can dig up.

Good luck.
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