Arguments to stop waiting

Since my car accident 3 years ago I've been working extremely hard at getting my life back to as much pre-accident "normal" as possible.

The past three days have been astoundingly difficult. I have done nothing but lie in bed in pain trying to sleep away the agony. My husband works from home and his office (3 season) is a huge part of our lives. For the first 18 months we lived in our living room, it was our bedroom. Just before we got married we started to sleep upstairs again. We managed for 8 months to spend most nights upstairs, apart because of pain and kicking.There were of course nights where my husband and I slept on the couch/mattress downstairs to avoid the pain and inability of trudging up the stairs. Before I went in for further surgery we purchased a pull out and we've been using it for the past 12 months. The problem with it is it takes up the majority of the living room making me feel like I should be able to do the stairs.

It came to me yesterday that I can no longer wait 6, 8, 10 months until our one story house is built. I've agreed to start sleeping downstairs on the pullout sofa again. The goal being that I am going to regain control of the house and my abilities. I now want to redesign my husband's office into our first level bedroom. We have a spare double bed and lots of dressers so I believe we can keep both our current master bedroom and a bedroom on the main level. I just have to start tracking the importance and benefits of sleeping downstairs.

Any suggestions on how to track and demonstrate the importance of living on a single level? I really don't want to "steal" my husband's office but I think in the long run it will be best for both of us.

Thanks for listening.

Hi Anna

The purpose of the tracking is to help my husband see how much easier it would be to make a bedroom, not just a pullout downstairs. He and I are very organized and think our decisions through (sometimes too much).

My current care is that I have a well selected team of health care professionals (psychologist, physiotherapist, occupational therapist, massage therapist, chiropractor, naturopathic doctor, fascial therapist, reiki, orthopaedic surgeons, vascular surgeons, plastic surgeon, etc.) My left femur is still non union so I haven't technically began my recovery towards a plateau. My last two surgeries (April and October 2013) were focused on "jump starting" the healing in my left leg. Once the femur is healed then I will see two specialists regarding my left knee and we will decide what to do with it.

It's been a long three years but I am making progress just slow with ongoing setbacks. Pain management and finding a good balance is where my focus lies.

Oh! And good ol excel or an app on your phone could work. I know that there are 'pain apps' out there, if you wanted to research. Or if you're into creating databases, MS access is a decent tool.

I agree with you White Beard! Hence the name of the post, I am tired of explaining simple "no brainers" to him. It's hard because he comes up with reasons why not to do it. He said the whole reason we got the pullout was to not have to have a bedroom downstairs. He did suggest we move a dresser downstairs so I'm going to start with that. Plus with the weather warming up I'm hoping we can move a couple items from his office to the garage. I'm just tired of having to persuade him.

Very frustrating!

Persuade him?

I would think that seeing your situation would be sufficient for him to feel properly motivated. It may depend less on what you're saying to him, and more on the tone and frequency with which you communicate.

We had to do something (sort of) similar, but we did it together, where our living room became our bedroom because I could no longer make it up and down stairs,....even halls were scary.

Perhaps rather than "ask" him, "tell" him that this is what you need for your well-being, however temporary the situation is, and before he can pipe up, thank him profusely for his understanding, and go get comfortable.





M.