Hi, Andrea.
I also have endometriosis and adenomyosis, so I definitely relate to your problems. I'm in my mid-30s, and much like you, I do not want to have my uterus removed. Even though the hysterectomy would most likely help my pain, I really want to have children. Once I've had a child though, I will most likely make the decision to remove the uterus.
You mentioned that you are afraid of the surgery. Do you mean that you're scared of the procedure, or do you mean that you want to keep your uterus? If you're scared of the surgery, I can reassure you that it isn't a bad procedure with today's technology. One of my friends recently had a hysterectomy performed vaginally, and she had a very fast recovery. Surgery is scary. But, sometimes, it is worth facing the fear to achieve a life filled with less pain.
Many doctors definitely push women to have hysterectomies, but the ultimate decision should always lie with the woman. Whatever you decide, there are options to control your symptoms. The pain and excess bleeding associated with adeno and endo is indeed horrible, so it's very important to find ways to control both problems.
Have you tried any of the hormonal treatments for endometriosis? Continuous birth control pills provide relief to many women. You stop having periods, which helps quiet adenomyosis problems. Also, I've met many women that have had a great deal of success with a drug called Depo-provera. (I imagine that it's available in Malaysia too. Basically, it's an injectable form of the hormone progesterone. It is usually used as a birth control method.)
Lupron is often used by gynecologists in the United States to control endo and adeno, but the side effects can be awful. You can only take Lupron for six months at a time, and usually, the pain returns after it is discontinued. Thus, Lupron isn't considered to be a wonderful medication for endo by many people (including myself).
Adenomyosis is very difficult to treat. Is your adenomyosis diffuse, or is it localized to one area in your uterus? If the endometrium is diffusely located throughout the muscular layer of your uterus, the only way to eradicate the pain is to have a hysterectomy. Occasionally, the endometrium will be localized to a small area in the muscular layer though, and when that happens, a surgeon can excise the adenomyosis and preserve the uterus. Have you ever had a MRI? That can sometimes determine if adenomyosis is diffuse or localized to one location.
Concerning your ovarian cysts, are they endometriomas? Endometriomas are cysts that form as a result of endometriosis, and they're filled with old blood that resembles chocolate. (They're often referred to as "chocolate cysts" for that reason.) If you have endometriomas, it is important to find a surgeon that is experienced in endometriosis surgery. Often, gynecologists will just drain the cysts and leave the remnants of the cyst behind. When that happens, the cysts quickly refill with blood after surgery, leading to a woman developing multiple cysts on the same ovary. It is vitally important for the surgeon to remove the entire cyst and not just drain the fluid. Three years ago, I had a huge cyst on my ovary, and my surgeon spent a long time dissecting it from the ovary. She was able to remove the entire cyst, and it has not returned. Have you had surgery to remove the cysts from your ovary?
If you have not yet tried any hormonal medications, like birth control pills, I highly recommend that you give them a try. You may be able to manage your symptoms so that you can avoid a hysterectomy. Another option is to have a uterine ablation performed. The ablation removes the endometrium lining from your uterus, thus stopping mentrual flow. You will be unable to have children if you have an ablation performed though.
Do you take iron supplements to help with your anemia? If not, that may help you tremendously.
I hope that I've helped. I definitely understand what you're going through right now. You are not alone. If you have any questions, please let me know. Take care of yourself, and stay strong.
Best wishes, and good luck.