Do people ever give you looks when you leave early?

I often have to leave places early. For example: a wedding, a family dinner out, a family members house, a meeting, etc. I sometimes get that "look." Like either the person has no idea that I'm really in pain and they judge me thinking that I'm being rude and don't want to be social. I can't stand it. It really makes me feel bad about myself. Or, people don't understand why I can't do something. Oh boy, this is just something that really bothers me and I wanted to see if anyone else goes through it too. Most people are kind and understanding, but there are a few that just make me feel so GUilty!

Anyone else?

Flower

flower123

I am glad you brought this topic up! This is one that has has caused me grief for a long time! It is especially bad if your at a place where you can not sit down in a comfortable position, or and have any way of finding relief from your pain! This has always been a point of contention between my wife and I! Especially if we are at some doings at one of her relatives house. She is the type of person who wants to be the last person to leave, and I often am ready to leave allot earlier! If we are at something that is local there is not problem as we will each just take our own car and then I can leave when I want. But if we are at one of the "Outlaws" places ( which is usually 50 or 60 miles away from home then we just take one car and go together!) that often presents problems! When your in pain you do not feel like socializing, and I know some of my "outlaws" are more atune to pain problems than others, many of them just don't care, as is often the case with the wife! So after awhile I sometimes just don't go to some of the "doings!" and then I will hear about that! But it is no fun to be at an event and be really "hurting!" I have done that way to often! It comes to point that you just have to do what is right for you!

So Flowers you are not alone with your feelings about this topic! I know exactly how you feel! But you know other people can't see or feel our pain and discomfort, and if you are like most of of use you really don't like showing your misery to others, I know I don't! So I often try and mask my feelings about my pain!

I don't see an easy solution to it, it is just something we have to put up with as being part of having CP I guess! It does help if you have a spouse or partner or some body that recognizes your problems and cares and supports you with dealing with it!

Please try not to feel guility about needing to leave early, you definitely have a legit reason!
Good Luck to You!
White Beard

Flower, I get this at work all the time. Only my main supervisors know of my issues. Mondays I have injections done so I don't work monday I have my schedule changed to Tuesday thru friday in turn they work monday thru thursday. My hours can change and they don't understand which can get me to ugly looks and comments like "they must love you" smartmouthed. But I'm don't work to make friends. I used to have to work 12 hour shifts up until last week but its changed to 10 hour shifts (because of the need to have me there more days) but it helps me 12 hours is a killer with CP.

Family has just been told within the last 6 months about my CP. I on the other hand demand myself to be present at all times from beginning to end. Some reason after my mother died now everyone comes to me for everything. I do all the holidays, birthdays and weddings. Now my family tells me to sit down or go lay down.

But yes I think ALL OF US deal with issues of CP with family, friends and co-workers on a daily basis. The ugly stares I believe will NEVER go away.

Laurie

I am also very good at masking my pain. But it is incredibly exhausting. When I get back from class, even if it is just an hour break, I collapse. And a lot of times I'll "hide" during family parties because I feel so horrible & do not want to talk about it with my family. Just today we had a family party at our house, and after about an hour & a half, I left, went up to my room & just laid down (I actually feel asleep until some nasty thunder storms woke me up) because I couldn't handle being at the party & I really wasn't feeling well in general. I hardly ever go out with my friends because of my situation, and I definitely get looks & comments about that.

So, no, Flower, you are not the only one that has to do this!

Skeye

Flower, I hope you keep coming back. I wish I could say it gets better because most of the time it does not. But having these friends here on the forum makes dealing with the pain and all the effects of it and the medications easier as we walk through it together.