Frances....Thank You for the information.....and I value your experience on this. I have been on Percocet around 8 years and was on Oxycontin for around 6 to 8 months if I remember correctly. I have had a long standing fear of withdrawls from these meds, and have actually taken myself off of them for a few days. In doing so, I never really suffered withdraws to speak of. Maybe very mild....but never as decribed by some of the members here.
My thought here is to replace the Percocet, and take the Ultram, since it is a lower dosage. But since reading your post I may want to rethink my decision. I know, many of the members here will chastize me for this, but one of the reasons that I want off the meds, is because of guilt by peers and Dr's here. We had a quack Dr here that was just convicted of killing several of his patients on overdoses. (Oxycontin, Percocet's)
My PCD has been very good in supporting me in the pain management, but does not like me being on them. I have always been a pleaser first in life. The other reason that I want to be off of them, is I need my mind to be sharp in order to do my job, plus.... I miss so much in life, with my mind dulled by them.
At first, when I started taking them, life seemed to be pretty good, and carefree, but it didn't take me long to realize that I did not want this for the rest of my life. I wanted my old superman self I once was. .....and there lies the problem.....in faceing reality. This was one of the main reasons that I left HW during my recovery, as I was struggling mentally with what was possible.....and seemed to be so far out of my reach.
I'm sure that there are members with Failed back Syndrome, who may understand what I'm talking about. Everybody's back surgery is different as is the recovery. It's so unpredictable...but there are things we can do to increase the odds of succesful outcome.
I'm guessing by now, you are saying "This guy is a Loney tune"......this is what can happen to a person during a very long recovery. Even a negative responce or lack there of from members can affect one mental state as they are looking for hope from anywhere they can get it.
So!.....where do I go from here?....well....I will keep on pushing for hope, listen to good advice such as yours, and strive to do my best in life, and support those who will let me.
By the way.....I'm having one of those rare pain free days.....completely pain free. Odd....I know but this has been going on for the last two months. I will have a few pain free days, and then sink back into the same old pain as before. When this happens, I get my hopes up, and believe that I can get off the meds.
Again, Thank You!
SE:)