Vickie, that is EXACTLY what I notice as well, and I find it difficult to explain. Looking back, I remember years ago just always sticking my left leg out of the blankets, I just didn't like it covered. Now with total foot drop it's exacerbated just sitting with no brace, being in bed (and I have a backup hospital bed, but where it bends for the knees, just doesn't fit my short body and feels like it pulls worse, just from gravity. Mere gravity hurts. What a bizarre concept).
Pandora, same thing. I have to choose my poison because as much as I am concerned with over bracing, I'm also not fond of tripping,...I've got enough replaced parts and repaired broken bones, I don't have much left of my original parts.
Since I was a child, I've always had very large calves. Rock climbing, riding horses, mountain biking, and good ole German genetics. It's always been natural to me to stretch my gastrocs and my soleus as well, all the time, waiting in line, in the car, doing dishes,...even laying in bed, I'm a big calf stretcher. I still do it unconsciously with my right leg. I put my left Achilles atop my flexed toes of my right foot, and use my right toes to try and stretch that tendon while activating my tibs.
In the back of my mind I've had this fear of contracture with that tendon. Even passively my foot won't bend much, and it does not feel like it's calf related, THAT I am familiar with extremely well. This,...well, this is new stuff and I don't know what, if anything (?) I can do about
it?
Everyone's on point though about
that weird combination of feeling numb, yet being in pain. Feels like a contradiction, but try explaining that to someone, a non CP'er, and I see the eyes start to glaze over.
Right now, my foot is still in the most pain it's been in for ages, the instep and arch hurt, the heel, the toes feel like constant needles are being stuck into them, and bees are working their way UP my foot, not down my leg. Weird, huh?
I keep trying to maintain faith that feeling pain is better than not feeling anything, but I'm getting at the edge of my rope.... Not denying good days, because I have those too, thank God. Just now, not a particularly good time.
Sookie
EDIT: This sounds "off" but,....I swear it feels like even my toenails hurt on those curled up toes. The great toe has some strength to it, but that's a double edged sword too because the more it remains closer to normal, the greater the intensity of the "dropped" toes pulls. I never thought I'd write that my toenails feel like needles are being stuck underneath them and run up to the metatarsals....one doesn't think that comes up in daily conversation, you know.
Post Edited (Sookie Snows) : 8/7/2013 11:44:48 AM (GMT-6)