Hi, I've suffered from chronic pain for many years, for many reasons... Sometimes I feel like when they were handing out health, I thought they said wealth and decided to live a life of poverty. I have chronic pelvic adhesions, DDD, Stage III Hidradenitis Suppurativa, and nerve pain from major bi-lateral leg surgery (for Hidradenitis Suppurativa), just to name a few things. I've been on full disability since 2007, and I turned 50 in December.
My husband is ridiculously healthy, lol. He puts up with me with humor and compassion. He tolerates my lack of stamina well, and I do my best to keep up with him, but if I can't, I don't get angry if he wants to do things on his own (I'm talking mainly when we go on vacation, if I'm not up to excursions/shows, etc).
I've been on opiod pain meds consistently since 2007, other than a 6 month trial in 2010 when my GP stopped prescribing them at all to anyone and I decided to see if I could handle life without them. I survived, but I didn't live, if you know what I mean. I could barely get out of bed because I hurt so bad. I wound up at a pill mill for a year because there wasn't any doctor I could find that would take on a long term pain patient who didn't have cancer. The only local pain management clinic wanted to take me off what I know works (MS Contin/MS IR) and put me on Methadone, which I've never taken, and to be honest, scares me.
I finally found a GP who would take me and my meds on in 2012. Since 2007, I've only gone up in dose 2x on the MS Contin, and even that, I started at 15mgs, went to 30, and when that stopped being as effective, the next dose up is 60, which I didn't want to do, so I am on 45mgs - a 30 and a 15mg, every 12 hours (plus up to 3 - 15mg MSIR for breakthrough pain).
I get so frustrated with being treated like an addict. The last time I had to go to the ER, the ER doc asked why I was on morphine, I gave him a truncated version (same hospital system so he could have seen himself on the computer if he wanted to go in depth) as I wasn't there for anything to do with my conditions nor was I wanting or needing pain meds (I had pneumonia). He told me my conditions weren't painful and I shouldn't be on morphine... All of that before he even examined me at all, let alone looked at anything in my records other than my med list!
I am fastidious with my meds, I sort them into a month long pill sorter the moment I get home from the pharmacy (I started using one when I double dosed by accident once a few years back and the ceiling started breathing), they get locked up in a lock box if I'm going to be gone for more than a trip to the grocery store, I even shred my med info sheets and bottle labels every month! My husband and I don't drink or do recreational drugs at all, we own 8 healthy senior pets (read expensive, lol) and 2 homes, all of our bills are paid. I have never failed a drug test, I follow all the rules in my pain med contract, and I turn down pain pills from the dentist and ER docs when I have a procedure in the ER (a fairly common occurance with Hidradenitis Suppurativa).
I get angry when I'm regularly asked by docs "so when are you going to come off the pain meds". My response is always "when you can cure me!". I know I'm not alone in my frustrations. I also know there is a large opiod problem. I lost my niece to heroin in 2015 that started as a prescript
ion pain med addiction
But there has to be some type of happy medium that stops villifying responsible CP sufferers. My husband and I are planning a cruise for next year, and I need to sit with a calendar and count out the days between now and then to make sure when we can book the cruise so it won't fall on a refill date, because of it does, I'm SOL.
Ok, sorry for rambling/ranting, last week was bad because my doc's office made a typo on one of my script
s and I had to go back and forth a few times to get it sorted out (3rd time in 4 months and they are a town away).
Hi to all. I hope everyone has a pain free day.
E