Feeling Abandoned

Hi everyone... I know this is going to sound very very silly...but I just got home from my neurologist and I'm still kind of in shock. This doctor has been treating me for my neck and severe headaches since 2001. She was the only doctor that appeared to have given a rats ass about the way I was feeling, the pain I was in and what she could do in order to make me comfortable. After long months of tests, x rays, mri's, eegs etc, she had done everything she could do as far as procedures to fix what was up with my neck and the headches and we worked on finding me the right medicine to take the pain away without me being some zombie. It took awhile because of reactions to medications, allergies and that whole ball of wax. What worked for the most part was stadol for pain. For those of you that are not familiar with it, it's a nasal spray form of meds and along the lines of morphine I guess would be the closest thing. This medicine was a blessing to me. The doc and I have had a close dr, patient relationship and I actually *trusted* her...which is a rare thing for me. (Dont like or trust doctors at all).  We have been through a lot together and she took care of my mother during the last years of her life. 

Today when I was there for my trigger point injections (in my neck) she told me that she is no longer going to perscribe narcotics. She went on to tell me about her close friend that just got her lisence suspended for writing narcotic scripts in her practice. I was stunned. I just sat there for a few min after she told me. She said that she didn't want to cut me off on such short notice, so she gave me enough perscriptions for two months worth of medicine. But that is it. I asked about the xanax I was taking.  It was  .5 mg at night when I cant sleep. She said no, it was a narcotic and she wouldn't right anymore scripts for that either. She went on to say that she worked so hard etc for her lisence. You know, I can understand her not wanting to get into any crap with the FDA and the medical assosiations..but she is a freaken neurologist! She deals with peoples pain etc. And she wont be perscribing narcotics anymore to her paitents?

As I said, I know it sounds silly and all. But she has been taking care of me for almost 8 years now. And for her to just cut off meds, knowing now that I have all these new problems with my back... I don't know. I feel abandoned by her. Now ontop of trying to find a doctor that can take care of my back, I have to find a new doctor for my neck and severe headaches. I am grateful she gave me enough medicine to get me through until dec..but I feel so lost.

I'm really depressed.

Thank you Chutz. I appreciate your kind words. I've been so depressed these past few weeks, now to get hit with this crap from the one doctor I always thought I could trust and be on my side. I feel like such an idiot. I'm so sick of nothing going on the right track for me with these health issues. So I guess next week, I start hunting for a new doctor for my neck and head. Gonna give myself a week or so before I ask her for my records and stuff. I dont want to snap at her..and thats all I feel like doing right now..well, not snapping, actually telling her off is what I feel like doing.

 

I'm new here, but I am NOT new to the world of pain, neurologists, pain clinics, neck trauma-I've had two surgeries for a torn disc since 01-and I'll never be healed from that. Now, my lumbar area and both hips are all messed up! I'm taking (4) 10mg lortab and (4) 10mg methadone a day-just prescribed soma for the constant aching in my legs, and valium to help me sleep.
If my PM doc took me off my meds, I'd LOSE MY MIND-it IS the only thing that keeps me going!! I have a full time job, 2 teenagers, and soon, I'll be planning a wedding-my own. :)))

So let me tell you-what you are facing is NOT silly!!! I'd be devistated if I were facing this!! Find yourself a new neurologist NOW. One that cares more about your health and your comfort level-a level that you can function at and live with-if you find one and that one doesn't pan out, move on until you do. Your rights are at stake and you need to be cared for.

Please don't be hasty-in the medical community one can be labeled as a doc hopper and heaven knows-they'll start thinking you are looking for narcotics. So just be careful. You know what I mean-my fiance had a HORRIBLE abcess in his mouth, and was due to get the tooth pulled the next day. The pain was so severe-and he has a very high level of pain tolerance-he was on his knees, shaking. I drove him to the ER, and I guess cause he is a young man (mid 30's) and is of the "blue collar" profession, they naturally thought he was looking for a script-well, he was!! but it was for real. I'm tired of these jerks labeling people that really need help. They gave him a shot of novacaine IN THE ROOF OF HIS MOUTH w/o even a swab of numbing stuff on it, it made me cringe-and 2 five mg hydrocodone. What a joke. Then charged him 800 bucks for it!!

Sorry I tend to get off track when I am ranting about the docs and such.

I wish you luck. I can't imagine what you must be going through. Please hang in there, at least you've been given enough time to find another b/f your medication runs out. Ask for ALL of your records, tests results, etc so the next doctor won't go through it all again and put you off.

It will work out!!! Keep positive. That is what everyone says to me, and it works.

Actually it's only two doctors. My neurologist who gives me the meds for my headache, the stadol. I've been seeing her since 2001. The other doctor, a PM doctor, is new. I had gone to the orthopedic for my back, (thought it was my hip that was bad and he found all the stuff with my back) he sent me to the PM doc. I dont know if they are uncomfortable with each other or not, but I'm up front about them with all parties involved. I want to make sure they know what I'm taking so they don't give me something that would have a bad reaction if mixed with anything else I'm taking. I no longer see the orthopedic, just the PM doc and my neurologist. And now, no longer the neurologist.

I just dont understand why my neurologist has gotten so odd. If she is uncomfortable writing scripts, why give me 9 scripts to cover the next two months? I dunno, after 8 years...all this cloak and dagger stuff is crazy.

Thank you again everyone for your support. It really is a blessing to have a place to go to where folks understand what you are going through. I'm sure family members are sick to death of hearing me complain or hearing me be cranky because of pain. And frankly, if you don't go through it, you have no idea. Even the doctors that don't have the pain can't understand what it's like. As far as I'm concerned, this government blows when it comes to helping people in pain. I really really hate to see what it's going to be like in 10 years to try to get some kind of pain relief...if it's this tough now, it will be downright impossible.

Thank you again everyone, your kinda ears and words are a great blessing.

Rob