HealingWell
Search Close Search
☰

Prepared or not to tell people of your CD?

Support Forums
>
Crohn's Disease
✚ New Topic ✚ Reply
1 2
❬ ❬ Previous Thread |Next Thread ❭ ❭
Posted 6/4/2008 1:55 PM (GMT 0)
I educate people around me about Crohns as much as I can. I share articles etc so that maybe I don't have to go into the gory details of what I suffer. I had one coworker give me this article on the "Raw Food Diet". I had just a few days earlier given him an article a fellow Crohnie had written about their life with Crohns and how we had to eat special diets or we could get very very ill. I told him if I followed that diet I would probably be dead. He still didn't get it. I guess ignorance is bliss......
Posted 6/4/2008 2:30 PM (GMT 0)
Kittikatt, Sometimes HR people are the worst to their employees. I had a previous boss that knew the laws well and he was careful not to break them. I was looking for something and I found a file on me. I think he was building a case to fire me due to my illness. He seemed like he thought I was a bad employee cause I was sick. I found a new job as quick as I could to get out of there. kimberlayn and Shoshanna. I have sent that spoon theory to so many people... I have the pdf version and emailed to my family. it worked some and that story made me cry the first time I read it. here is where i got the pdf version.... http://www.butyoudontlooksick.com/the_spoon_theory/ I can also email it if anyone wants it PM me. This week I am regretting that I did not tell anyone. My tummy is making terrible noises and I have been so exhausted I am barely making it through the day! Karen
Posted 6/4/2008 2:49 PM (GMT 0)

Kittikat,

I have a similar issue that is hard to deal with at times too.  I am a 27 year old male who was diagnosed with crohn's diesease in 2001.  I haven't had a lot of problems with the disease so far, but have had some flare ups that at times leave me laying in bed and not being able to travel for work.  I have told some of the people I work with, but a lot of people still don't know what my struggles are.  I am 6'4" and weigh about 190 pounds.  For someone who is my height, I am a bit on the skinny side.  I hear all the time from people I work with how much I can eat and never gain a pound.  I would like to tell them at times, but I don't want people to feel bad for me.  I am not looking for sympathy. 

The hardest thing I still stuggle with today are my friends.  They don't understand why I don't want to go out and drink with them or stay up late or go to ihop at 4:00 in the morning.  I am finding the diesease to hinder my social life more than anything else.  Though I don't always want to do the social scene, I seem to be more isolated these days than usual.  I have always liked to spend time alone and read or work on my car, anything, but these days I seem to be getting more distant as I feel many of my friends don't understand my problems.  Even having to cancel plans that I had far in advance due to painful flareups has caused them to be angry.  I try to explain the problem to them and for a short time they seem to understand, but then ultimatley 'forget' on the Friday night everyone is going out to the bar.  Anyway, I thought I would share some of what I am experiencing with everyone as well.  I am single and have been for a pretty long time too.  I think the disease may have something to do with that too.  I am not embarassed to have the diesease, but I seem to be less outgoing these days.....

Good luck with the coworkers.  I understand how difficult it can be to let people know of your stuggles. 

Posted 6/4/2008 5:34 PM (GMT 0)

A raw food diet...HA!!!!  OMG, that dude REALLY doesn't get it, does he Nanners?!  That hurts my bowels just thinking about it... :-)

Shoshanna - your story about someone commenting on one of your coworker's bathroom habits flew all over me! mad   I mean, seriously - WHAT KIND OF PERSON has the AUDACITY to ask someone about the number of trips they make to the bathroom and how long they stay in there?!  I would be about ready to scratch someone's eyes out who I heard say something like that.  You did good firing back at them! devil

That's yet another reason I don't particularly want to share my disease with the people in my entire building.  There once was a female supervisor who was supervising just one man. Not that he had Crohn's (of course, he COULD have and I not known it! :-) ), but this supervisor would keep track of his trips to the bathroom and the amount of time he was gone.  She evidently had nothing BETTER to do.  She would meet with him weekly and go over her "time sheet" of his bathroom breaks.  Within 3 months of him being assigned under her, he had a nervous breakdown and retired early.  I felt so bad for him.

Gross story alert! skull   This is a gross story but I'm going to tell it anyway because it still speaks to the reason why I don't particularly want everyone in my office building knowing about my Crohn's...many years ago (long before I knew I had Crohn's), I remember all these people gathered around laughing uncontrollably... maybe 10 or so people?  I thought I'd missed out on something BIG so (unfortunately) I asked what was so funny.  Turns out they were all laughing about someone else's POOP.  Someone had "gone #2" in the woman's bathroom and, well, it was so big it wouldn't flush (I'm sorry! I said this was a gross story!).  The janitor told someone she'd never seen anything like it before so that person had to go see it for herself (who in the world would want to look at someone else poo?!?). Well, word of this "monstrosity" just kept spreading throughout the building...even to the warehouse boys in the back who ended up - OMG, get this - taking a PICTURE of it!  WHAT IS WRONG WITH THESE PEOPLE?!?  This happened probably 10 years ago and people still bring it up on occasion.  Even back then, I can remember saying, "You people are sick!"  I never found it funny or interesting...just stupid.  And I have always felt bad for the person who...well, PRODUCED it...'cause I'm sure the fact that everyone was joking about it got back to her.  I don't know who it was and don't CARE to know who it was.  If I did, it's the only thing I'd think of every time I saw her!  Same with this illness.  I don't want office acquaintances thinking of diarrhea every time they see me! tongue   Don't get me wrong, I have a sense of humor but I mean, come on!  Surely there's a line SOMEWHERE in there...

BrianDK...yep, I totally get where you're coming from.  I'm single, too, and hardly have any kind of "single" social life anymore. I go to friends' kid's birthday parties & stuff but I don't have that group of single friends anymore.  6 years ago, I had a group of single girlfriends...but 6 years ago, I started getting sick.  I started having to cut out on our plans and eventually it took a toll on my friendship with all of them.  At that time, I'd been diagnosed with IBS.  When I told one of my friends I couldn't go out one night because my IBS was acting up, she's said, "OMG - suck it up, girl!  I've got IBS too - what's the big deal?  You go into the bathroom, come back out and get over it!"  It was at that time I knew something ELSE must be wrong with me because there's no WAY if she had what I had, she'd say it was no big deal!  It's definitely a very isolating disease.  When I'm in a flare, I'm often times locked up in my house to be close to the bathroom.  I've missed out on lots of things because of this Crohn's and when you don't participate people start to assume you don't WANT to participate, which is SO far from the truth.

I don't wish this disease on anyone...HOWEVER, I VERY often wish that those NON-understanding people could just ONCE deal with something debilitating - just for a week or two - so they can gain some kind of comprehension/understanding/knowledge of what it means to have a chronic illness that changes your every day activities.

Posted 6/4/2008 11:01 PM (GMT 0)
KittiKat - I think part of it depends on each person to as far as being able to "suck it up" as your friend said. I have no problem pooping in public and stinking the place up. I could care less what strangers think of me. But someone else might feel like they can't leave the house because they couldn't possibly have a crohns poop in public. Your friend might have just been trying to get you to feel comfortable going out even if you had to poop. But I agree that we do have days where leaving the house is impossible.
Posted 6/8/2008 3:08 PM (GMT 0)
FitzyK23 said... KittiKat - I think part of it depends on each person to as far as being able to "suck it up" as your friend said. I have no problem pooping in public and stinking the place up. I could care less what strangers think of me. But someone else might feel like they can't leave the house because they couldn't possibly have a crohns poop in public. Your friend might have just been trying to get you to feel comfortable going out even if you had to poop. But I agree that we do have days where leaving the house is impossible. I am geting better at not caring about going in public... at work is where I still have a problem. it is still embarasing to me. Karen
✚ New Topic ✚ Reply
12