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Crohn's Disease
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Posted 8/30/2008 6:27 AM (GMT 0)

   Ok fellow crohnies and uc pals.... I used to post on this forum and it always made me feel better to vent or pick on myself. So I was here reflecting on the past ten years that I have had c/d and I thought of several occurences that just made me bust out laughing. The past two weeks of my life have really sucked so I figured why not do something to somewhat lighten up some potty moods. And what better way than  to laugh at yourself instead of the expence of others. I have two to start us out.

  First one goes... It was 5 in the morning in the army at ft sill, ok. I was to have a PT test that day and I was in the middle of doing my sit up event when my gut decided to have a GI bleed. Of course the guy that was holding my feet really freaked out as did the rest of my platoon. Now ladies this is in no way meant to be offensive to the opposite sex so please please don't take it the wrong way. I was in an all male infantry field group so they really didn't know how to react to a guy that looked like he just had his cycle. Needless to say the platoon commander briefed the troops about my condition and when I returned from my 4 day stay at Reynolds Army Community Hospital I was greeted with a few chuckles and a really large box of maxi pads. I'm sure it was pretty insensitive at the time, but it made me feel better that the group that I lived with didn't treat me like someone with the plague, but someone with a health condition that wasn't contagious.

  My second event was much worse because it was in a more public setting. I was in alabama visiting some family and of course my wife wanted to visit the mall while we were there. I'm not big on unfamiliar places especially if I don't know where the quickest way to the restrooms.. And this mall was huge so you figure they would have many restrooms. They had two to be exact! one at each end of the mall. So I am smack dabb in the middle of the mall. I end up having a accident very very embarrassing. I couldn't make it a half mile to the end of the mall. So I went to a deptment store stall after my wife purchased me some new digs and I ended up borrowing one of my 10 month old son's diapers for added security. It really sucked that day to have crohn's and I haven't stepped into another mall since then and probably never will... to many bad memories..lol.

  Ok... I have said mine... what is yours? We are all stuck in the same boat so we might as well have a laugh about some of the pickles this disease usually prevokes. God Bless You All!!!

Posted 8/30/2008 8:25 AM (GMT 0)
Ah Southpaw33

Being a female, you made me laugh out loud re the menstrual cycle episode!! I just had visions of what their faces looked like. My recent bleeding episode was in Feb this year when wouldn't stop for 36 hours. FOr the first week I was put in a hospital room with 3 MEN! You can imagine, no control over the bleeding, nurses coming in to change you as you've collapsed previously when upright, the Dr (who you don't know from a bar of soap) wanting to look at everything you produce and getting to see you in full naked glory while being changed AND visitors in the room visiting the other patients and getting to hear everything that's being said and done.

Furthermore, they gave me a bedpan that was so large, my butt fell in it and so got covered in blood. As I was confined to bed for 5 days, I could only use the bedpan and bird wash. THe day after the bleeding finally stopped the nurse just plonked water and a towel on my bed and took off, leaving the blinds opened for all patients and staff on the other side of the building to see my lilly white butt in the air while trying to wash. Not only that, the nurse left what I thought was a cleansing wipe. Oh yes, it was a cleaning wipe alright, one with alcohol in it and should only be used to sterilise your hands!!! So, you can imagine the pain that my poor bot felt. No wonder I didn't use the bedpan for a whole 24 hours afterwards............ the poor spinchter muscle had crawled up inside well and truly.

Cheers
B
Posted 8/30/2008 8:40 AM (GMT 0)
Okay, I guess i will share this one, though haven't even told my husband this one!

I was in a 5 star really fancy hotel.  I get away just on my own about 3x a year and this was one of them.  I was dressed to the tea on my way to a formal dinner!  It was great.  I was on the 6th floor, but very near the lift.  a friend and I were going down to dinner and the lift was packed when I felt gas passing through my gut ready to explode out.  As much as I tried, I just couldn't hold it in and with a loud most embarrising sound out came the most horrible and foul stench that soon permeated the whole lift!  Everyone was about to gag and came out of the lift (two floors early) gasping for air.

Of course, my friend thought it was the funniest thing ever and we couldn't stop laughing about it the whole of dinner. 

Sometimes we do have to laugh, laugh out loud at the situations this CD gets us into!

Thanks for that.

yrot

Posted 8/30/2008 9:03 AM (GMT 0)

heheheh YellowRose, that bought tears to my eyes from laughing so hard, I suppose it also bought tears to the eyes of the people in the lift..... ;)

I know I have a warped sense of humour but it definitely helps at times with this condition.

Cheers, B

"The aim of life is to live, and to live means to be aware, serenely, divinely, drunkenly aware" Henry Miller

tongue  

Posted 8/30/2008 4:17 PM (GMT 0)
Ok here goes!! I was on maybe the 5th date with my ex-husband and we went up to Lion Country Safari. It's one of those wild animal parks where you ride in your car to see all the wildlife and they can come up to your car etc. I made the mistake of eating some mexican food before we went in (I was a fairly new Crohnie at the time). While we were driving out in the middle of the park, no br in sight for miles, I tell him I need a bathroom and need one now. about this time a Rhino decides to stop right in front of our car and WOULD NOT MOVE!! So as you can guess, all Hell broke loose and I pooped my pants right in front of my new boyfriend. He was great and got me to a bathroon and while I cleaned myself up, he cleaned up the car. I was very embarrassed naturally, but he was really kind about the whole thing. I still have the ticket stubs in a old photo album and underneath them says "Right in front of the cheetahs, and it was the Rhino's fault". Everyone asked about them when they looked in the photo album and we just always said personal joke:)
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