Crying over fears of my first Bowel Resection surgery...what should I expect?

I had a 6 year old and a 3 year old when I had my first resection. And I was miserable before it. I really was pushing to be the mother my daughters needed me to be. As soon as they would nap, so would I. Some days we would have 'quiet' days where I was on the couch and they would just play on the floor. I don't know what your life is like now, but my guess is that if you are heading to surgery, it can't be much better.

For the first little bit, you will need help. You won't be able to lift your daughter to change her or put her in her crib for a few weeks. The standard is nothing over 5lbs. And you will need to eat very soft food for a while and expect to have loose bowels until your body heals. But in the long run, you will get your energy back and you will be able to do all the things you want to do. Just give yourself time to heal first. If you have family around that can come to help, let them. Don't try to be a hero. If you don't have anyone to help, then do as much prep work as you can. Freeze meals so that you can have easy dinners ready, especially on nights when you aren't feeling your best, because you will have good days, and bad days in the healing process. Try to set things up so that for the first little bit you don't have to go up and down stairs too much. Have all your daughters favorites things and maybe even some easy snacks on the main living area/den, plus a diapering station. These are just a few tips.

My girls are in college now, but I was able to chaperone field trips, be room mother, run the book fair, be PTO president, basically be the typical koolaid Mom from the TV commercials. My resections gave me my life back and allowed me to be a real Mom to my daughters.

Hi Amy,I had a resection done over 15 years ago  my children were 3&4 at the time and i can honestly say it was the best thing i had done and never regreted that decision i made,  i also got a long remmision out of it!!!i was really ill and unable physically to look after my kids the way i wanted to because of the pain,fatigue, and the dreaded D i couldn't carry on like that. So i had the op it wasn't to bad ,but the recent op i had in Jan was far better. I was given an epidural to knock me out and it is also used after the op for pain relief  as well as a morphine pump i had no pain whatsoever i just suffered with being sick and gas around my back at day 3 but that was it if you read my sig below don't be alarmed about the temp stoma situation you probably won't need that but i had a fistula that needed seeing to at the same time. Everybody gets anxious when your going into the unknown its only natural, but try and  think of the outcome, You will have your life back! eating what you want, not tired all the time and the best thing being able to enjoy your little girl pain free!!!! good luck sweetie

Let us know how you get on Bev x

Thank you all soooo much for your replies. They are all so comforting! I already feel worlds better. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you!!!

You've already gotten great advice.
Just wanted to add that while you are recovering after the surgery in the hospital to get up and about asap. Try using a pillow on your tummy when getting out of bed and use the pain pump just before you are about to get up. Dont be afraid of using the pain meds - they are there to aid your recovery. I walked all around the hospital ward each day and found that helped.
Good luck and let us know how you are.
Jo

I am currently 9 days post resection #3.  I waited a long time for this operation because the prior two were certainly not remembered as a good time.  This third time was by far my best experience.  I had an epidural placed prior to surgery which stayed in place to provide pain relief for 3-4 days.  I had a pain pump in addition which helped with the remaining pain.  I was managed by an acute pain managment team and transitioned to oral meds before being released from the hospital on day #7.  I'm still on large doses of pain killers, but am tapering and definitely every day am getting better.  I am able to eat foods I have not eaten since 2004 and the surgeon says that 6 weeks post op I should be able to add in more fibrous foods like raw fruite and veggies and salad, all in small quantities, but all things I haven't been able to eat in 10 years.  My resections were all fairly complicated, fistulas and adhesions, this current one found my small bowel adhered to the wall of my abdominal muscle.  They were all open surgeries, one scheduled as such and two conversions from laproscopic due to the messed up state they always seem to find my intestines in...

If your quality of life is sucky as was mine, you will find the surgery to be a great relief, definitely it's what you should do if you're suffering and no longer able to kill the beast with the current meds etc.  After surgery you need to stay on the meds that do work for you, not wait till symptoms reappear.  I'm going to use Humira as a maintenance med, since Remicade has worked in the past for me, and 6-mp did not keep me in remission after my last surgery.  I suspect in one more week I will be so much happier and able to cope with my life again.

There are after surgery side effects, like increased potty trips, I know where all bathrooms are when out in public.  At friends houses I sometimes request the use of an out of the way bathroom if needed.  There are drugs available to help with urgency problems and they can also be quality of life savers after surgery so make sure you also discuss this with your doctor if the need arises.

I have three kids, 8, 5 and 2 and need help with the 2 year old to keep him from hitting or jumping on me.  It's hard enough to manage right now to walk around, get myself food and drinks, etc.  My mom was able to help for the first 1.5 weeks, I have another family member helping for another week and then will use my friends to help with dinner, laundry and my little one until I am able to lift him again.  You will need a lot of help so make sure to ask for it!

Amy...I just wanted to say, get on the Remicade!  You don't want to undo what the surgery has accomplished.  I was on it with no problems and all good results 6 years ago before my last surgery...I should have gotten right back onto the same type of med after my last resection.  The "big gun" drugs can seem scary, but the alternate is also not good, multiple surgeries have left me with borderline short bowel and only time will tell if I will require TPN, I currently have 120cm left...

Kim

I will probably have my first bowel surgery this fall too. Thanks to all of you who have posted, because it really helps to know what to expect .

Good luck Bachi. Will be thinking of you and looking forward to an update.
Mike

Well,

I came home from hospital today. Turns out the doctors did not have to 0pen me up completely, but recovery was a little longer than expected.

They took out 12 inches of my right colon. I'm still in a lot of pain, but am glad that the drainage tube is out of my side, which is what annoyed me most of all. I'm feeling better every day. I'm going through shock right now because it feels weird being home from the hospital. Hoping to see good results soon.

I'll keep everyone posted.

Thanks for keeping me in your thoughts everyone!

glad to hear things are getting better.