Handling rude assistant update -- I chickened out

"I know you were running late yesterday, so I didn't want to take up too much of your time. But when you get a chance, there's something kind of important that I really need to talk to you about. When do you think you'll have a chance to do that?"

He may offer to call you later or to make an appointment for you to come in and speak with him. But be prepared. He may say, "Right now."

In which case, take a deep breath and stay very calm (which is the only emotional state that doctors respect). Tell him that you're really sorry to have to bring this up, that you trust him and care about him a great deal, that it's something that you've tried very hard to deal with on your own, and that you've worked hard to give it time and the benefit of the doubt--but that you've been having an awful time with his assistant and are concerned that her treatment of patients may affect his practice. Be ready to give him the details if he asks for them.

If he brushes you off or rationalizes her behavior without asking for any details, it's not a good sign. In that case, just repeat that you value your relationship with him and that he's very important to you--and that you'd feel really terrible if things with his assistant get so bad that you'll have to find another doctor. Tell him that you desperately hope that it won't come to that, with you or with his other patients.

It's never easy to say things like this to anyone, but especially to a doctor. Just stay calm and earnest and lay out the facts for him. He needs to know what's going on.

Since you're having a scope, I suggest you briefly mention it, then forget about it.
Hopefully, the admin. assistant won't work there forever.

I agree with JustAnother--that if the situation is making you so nervous that you're having trouble handling it, then you should write your doctor a note and ask that he read it in private. Make sure, though, that you hand it directly to him--and not to the obnoxious assistant (even if it's marked "personal").

Good for you! I am SO proud of you for handling this serious issue with your doctor, even though you were nervous about doing it. It will be interesting to see what happens now (whether the assistant suddenly becomes very sweet to you--or whether he fires her--or whether nothing happens). But congratulations for getting some important things said--and heard!

Good job Inflamed!! Keep us posted to let us know if she changes or gets the boot. Hugs!