How does this sound for my next doc visit?

Between my job (25+ years analyzing medical reports and claims and evaluating ongoing medical cost risks) and my family and personal medical hx, I speak in medical terms often. That sometimes get me the look of - oh an internet trained hypochondriac. Does the following sound like something that will make me look like that? I have totally reached the state of I will carry this printed out and read it so I don't forget to say something---!

To neurologist (has only seen me once and I am still waiting on final test results):
I received the Rx for Cymbalta that you pre ordered for me. After research and discussions with several people in similar conditions, I have decided not to take it. It has a strong potential for causing mental distress and I have a family history of depression/suicide. With those side effects and the fact that it is not curative for the nerve issues only palliative, I am going to hold off on taking it until I see if better gut care helps the nerve issue. Unless you think an alternate pain medication has less issues (like gabapentin/Neurontin)? What are your thoughts? I also was wondering if this new dx would also cause the left elbow issue, the dizziness and the headaches because I can't remember if we actually talked about those being part of the hand/foot leg pain. {ps we did talk about them, but answers never really were made clear}

To GP (a wonderful listening man):
I said the pain was no longer tolerable, but I am very worried about the side effects of the meds that the neuro prescribed. What do you think of my plan (same as above comments)? I am going to make an appt. with GI doc, but wanted to get your insight as you know me as a whole.

To GI (jury still out whether I want to stick with this guy but GP really thinks he is good):
Here is the history of the whole neuro doc and why I went. Do you think that moving to a bigger med like Humira would help my gut AND my joints AND in turn ease some of the nerve pain? I still really don't want to move to a biologic with their side effects and long term needs, but I am considering it as opposed to a pain medicine that is not curative and scares me with the potential side effects. I still would like to try the antibiotic route as that seems to be when I felt best.

You made me smile because I am a lot like you and struggle with the same issues of how to best communicate with doctors. My local GI is super nice, but I feel like whatever I suggest he goes with, and sometimes it feels I'm the one who has to come up with all the treatment ideas. The specialist I see in Chicago literally said to me, "I am the doctor, and you are the patient. I listen carefully to your symptoms, and then I tell you how to treat it. It is not your job to figure out what to do." I was put off by this, but he knows Crohn's well and in the end he helped me more than my local doc! I wish I could find a combo of the two! My GP is very kind, but I don't have other medical issues, so I don't even involve him in my Crohn's care.

I think your ideas are reasonable and you should be able to have input and say what you want and think. And you have every right to be a smart, educated person who is actively involved in your own care! But, and this is the hard part- I think you need to try to evaluate the doc's personality and responses to you, and then alter your approach accordingly. I have brought in printed research articles, and then kept them in my bag and didn't share them because in the moment I made the judgement that the doc wouldn't be receptive. I do say "I read about this, and here are my thoughts" or some such thing. So your approach is good, but you might need to lean on your improv skills and react according to the situation. I wish this were not the case, but in my experience it's true!

Try sucking up a bit because it does help, like " I was really looking forward to this appointment because I really need your help. I have been reading about my symptoms and I'd like you get your perspective on what I am thinking about...." If he glosses over or doesn't directly answer your question like about your elbow, dizziness, etc. Try something like " Maybe we already addressed this, but I am still unclear about...

You should not ever agree to take a medication (like the Cymbalta) if it doesn't make sense to you, and I think asking for Neurontin makes a lot of sense. I am fully aware that you shouldn't in theory have to work so hard to suck up or evaluate doc's personalities, but your goal is to get what you need, not fix the world! At least that's my perspective.

I have a xanax prescription because it helps me with sleep, especially when I am in pain. All over my medical chart it says I have an anxiety disorder. I am absolutely positive that I do not fit criteria for an anxiety disorder.....I just appear neurotic because I ask so many questions! But I really don't care......If they need to label me as anxious so I can get xanax to help me then that is just fine with me! You don't have to be your doc's favorite patient....you just have to get what you need out of the appointment. I hope my endless rambling about this topic helps a little!

No, your questions/comments for them don't seem out of line or hypocondriacish(my own made up word). If you are concerned you won't be taken seriously can you take someone else with you who would be there just to be your advocate? Just so they don't try to gloss over your questions and concerns.

My GI just looked at me Monday after the scope when he said the humira wasn't working and my first question was "so do we go to once a week now?" I don't think he expected me to already be thinking of a course of action.