OT in a bind???

  Did you evey notice that when your driving and the urge hits you, and you know you only have a short time to get to a restroom, there is always that guy in front of you that is driving soooooo slow that you can watch the grass grow?? Its like all is flowing along and then that sinking feeling comes over you and out of no where, Poof, there he is, slower than a herd of turtles. He puttin along with his head bouncing like a bobblehead doll, jammin to some Perry Como tune or something. Your back there all clinched up so tight your eyes are blurred. Talking to him does not help either. Your like, geeeeez come onnnn, turn, turn off, pleassssssssse turn . And then you see that signal come on. Ohhh boy,,turn,lets go, now,,turn, and he makes that slowwwwww motion ease off the road that takes just long enough for a car waiting at the stop sign to pull out in front of you before you can get past.. Guess what ,,,the guy that just pulled out ,,,yep,, its his brother.  " CRAP." you say "Nooo don't crap"..just a few more miles, Then you start doing that breathing thing that they do in child birth. Whew, whew whew, just a little further, theres my turn, no no, hes turning there too,,,,,,,,,"CRAP.

Aw...come on, finish the story! DID YOU MAKE IT? I HOPE SO! I secretly put a hex on that guy tonight that he went home to visiting grandchildren in his one bathroom house, only to find the toddler on the "big" potty singing Mary Had a Little Lamb in four different languages ,while HE squirmed in the hallway in agony!!! Of course after he finally gets in the bathroom and does his business does he realize that the toddler just used all the toilet paper in the house and stopped up the toilet, oh yeah, and he doesn't own a plunger!!! Does that do it for you? Works for me!

hehehe....I think that guy just drives across the country his whole life because I am behind him all the time.
Last week I actually cursed when I came across a mom and her kids crossing the street too slowly----Dr Hyde, Mr jekyll is calling!

LOL. My problem is not so much the sitting, is that the moment I stand up, it's butt cheeks squeezing time. I don't know how many times I sat in the car and waited until my husband unlocked the front door so I could make a mad dash to the closest bathroom.

He must be, I live in Canada and I know that guy!!!!

"That guy" is one of the reasons why I sold my car, bought a van and put a port-o-pot in the back (took the very back bench seat out), so when I'm behind this guy I can simply pull over and dash to the back of my van and use my pot...I call my van "the potty van" as opposed to party van LOL.

:)

And why is it that the closer you get to the house or the bathroom the worse the urge or urgency becomes? It's like I can hold it until about 3 blocks away, but once I pull on my street it's agony! ***?

This is all so funny but so true. That guy is a real traveler, he shows up in Tx alot, maybe it a cousin. My problems is my drive way is on a slant, so getting out of my car on that slant with that urge, tighting the butt cheeks does not always work in this scenario.lol Susie

I meet him at least 4 times a week here just south of Dallas, Tx. He gets around!

Matthew

Sniper,
****! You just made me laugh out loud! We have all been there more times than we care to remember, huh? The part that cracked me up the most was where you talk about doing the childbirth breathing, I thought I was the only one who had to do that!! I should have known that others use that little trick too, and most times it works for me. When I get frustrated with an idiot driver I "wish him/her a flat tire"...is that wrong of me? Hahaha...Thanks for the laugh!

I do the childbirth breathing too -- and thought I was the only one!

Dude, you are a goof. :)

i really needed a laugh...thanks :). You know...come to weatherford, tx. Here it's the little old lady too short to see over the steering wheel driving reeeaaaalllyyy slow looking for garage sales....try getting behind that one.....LOL! the breathing thing is so true.

christina

Gail...He would not dare..