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"Pessimistic and looking for problems"

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Crohn's Disease
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Posted 6/27/2016 9:52 PM (GMT 0)
That's what the infectious disease nurse told me today. He said he sees people just like me a hundred times a day, that I'm just pessimistic and looking for things to be wrong. (This was in response to going to the ER on Saturday because the PICC line was aching really badly.) It made me cry. On the way home I thought of all the things I could say to him in my defense; I told him there that the times I have blown things off have turned out to be dangerous. I didn't go into detail, but I ignored pancreatitis for a month, chalking it up to Crohn's pain. I ignored an abscess for 24 hours and went septic and almost died. The last time I had a line, I had ZERO symptoms of a clot but still had one anyway.

But he just said that I've had bad things happen so now I just look for the worst in every situation. I've actually kind of been proud of myself for handling all of this well. But apparently I haven't been. I just feel awful and I don't want to go back there next week. I'm starting to cry all over again just typing this. cry

Oh, and he also said that I obviously don't tolerate pain very well because I went in for it hurting and accepted IV pain meds for the breast pain (it feels like someone is sticking hot pokers in them). He seemed unimpressed when I said that I came out of my c-section without pain meds, and just reiterated that I'm not very tough.
Posted 6/27/2016 10:56 PM (GMT 0)
That infectious disease nurse sounds like he is a bitter jerk. He needs to stop projecting his bitterness on other people. I sure hope you reported his obnoxious and unfounded comments. In the days of making the customer happy, they might actually do something for you and reprimand him. At the very least he owes you an apology. Shame on him. I bet he would be crying for morphine if he was in 1/4 of the pain you were in.
Don't even let his comments do anything to you. What a piece of work.
Posted 6/27/2016 11:22 PM (GMT 0)
Wow, what a prick! I cringed at the thought of anyone having pancreatitis for a month! I couldn't handle a night! Don't think you aren't handling things the best you can, and severe pain is never something someone should have to learn to deal with. I don't know if I could go back to someone that rude and awful. I would want to make a complaint to the doctor or someone. That is totally out of line!
Posted 6/27/2016 11:23 PM (GMT 0)
What a jerk is right! You don't have to justify ANYTHING to him. You are sick and need help. End of story. And if he is unable or unwilling to help because he is judging you to somehow be "weak" then he needs to find another profession. And he should be reported as Dikid mentioned above. I hope you are feeling better soon and can move beyond his rude and inexcusable behaviors! His comments totally reflect on him and not you! You are very brave and have been such an inspiration to me (for the past year since my son was dx). Hope you feel better soon!
Posted 6/28/2016 12:26 AM (GMT 0)
Don't let this jerk get to you. I'd like to see him deal with the pain we do everyday, I bet he'd accept those iv pain meds too!
Posted 6/28/2016 12:53 AM (GMT 0)
Probably a Brexiter with that kind of attitude.

What an unprofessional dumbass. If you thought your PICC line might have been infected then you were right to go in. During one hospital stay I had a cannula in the back of my right hand, which the staff left too long before changing (4 days). The insertion site began to hurt and a few hours later my whole hand started swelling up - I was quite frightened by that point and really had to go on at the nurses to get somebody to come and change it. But at least nobody gave me a moralising lecture on pain. To be honest, I'd have seriously felt like punching your nurse. I certainly think I would have snapped very badly at him. My tolerance for humanity in general dwindles with each passing year, I'm afraid.
Posted 6/28/2016 1:40 AM (GMT 0)
I suspect you already know that guy was a royal jerk. But for me anyway, even when I know that, my feelings still get hurt. Then I feel powerless and frustrated with myself for reacting. But you know we all love you, and you know that all of us who have followed your posts know what a brave person you are and how much you have been through. Try not to focus on it....that jerk will fade away faster that way. I'm so sorry that happened to you and I hope you are doing a bit better. Sending hugs and confidence your way!
Posted 6/28/2016 1:48 AM (GMT 0)
You guys are awesome. And my husband reacted the same way. Thank you! Between reading these and curling up with homemade bread and Thin Mints with milk, I am feeling better. :)
Posted 6/28/2016 1:49 AM (GMT 0)
I think I would have been shocked for all of 5 seconds and then I would have lost my crap.
They would have heard me tear him a new *** hole all the way in the morgue!
grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
Posted 6/28/2016 1:51 AM (GMT 0)
Agree with everyone and supporting you. This guy's a dick!!!

It might not be much consolation to you, but he'll get his. You might not be there to see it, or hear about it, and as much as we'd all like to, we really shouldn't.

It should be enough to know that his day is coming.

As mentioned, don't let this get you down.
Posted 6/28/2016 1:55 AM (GMT 0)
What an idiot! He sounds like he needs to get out of the profession if that is how he is treating patients. Has he ever even seen you before? He has no right to judge you let that!
While my mother was at inpatient physical therapy I walked in to the pt and ot telling her she wasn't trying hard enough and told me to tell my mother she wasn't trying hard enough dispite the fact that she was in excruciating pain in her leg that she she had never had before and was requesting pain meds despite being someone who rarely even asks for tylenol. They told her to push through the pain everyone has a pain and they just deal with it unlike you! I snapped back at them. Two days later her blood work showed her blood count dropped to 5! She had to be rushed back to the ER and get 6 blood transfusions all because of a giant hematoma that ended up engulfing her leg and made worse by "pushing through the pain"!

Long story short if you think you have a problem then it's better to be safe about it. Is there anyone else you can go to? You shouldn't have to put up with that given everything you've gone through
Posted 6/28/2016 11:39 AM (GMT 0)
Erin's dictionary
pessimism (n.) - dreading a bad outcome with no prior experiences of bad outcomes or reason to suspect a bad outcome
realism (n.) - being self aware of your past history and conscious of your own personal needs and history

That guy needs a dose of realism. Start by making him watch the movie The Doctor.
I had a GI doc once tell me "You don't have Crohns, you're just upset you're not married yet". Although him being struck by lightening would have been completely acceptable to me...I continue to hope he has small constant pain that no one ever diagnoses.
Posted 6/28/2016 11:30 PM (GMT 0)
It is absolutely not his prerogative to judge you or tell YOU how YOU feel. His job is to administer treatment and get you feeling better, he has no business telling you how tough or not tough he thinks you are. You have a right to seek medical treatment for LITERALLY ANYTHING that is bothering you.
Posted 6/29/2016 2:53 AM (GMT 0)
Ugh, why do people like that go into the medical field!?! What happened to caring and compassion?! I'm so sorry you had to interact with that jerk and it made you question your actions.

Hugs!
Posted 6/29/2016 3:24 AM (GMT 0)
:) You guys are the best. Thanks for cheering me up!

And @habs, I love those definitions!
Posted 6/29/2016 2:31 PM (GMT 0)
Boy, that really ticks me off! The jerk sounds like a doctor I once had who cursed me out when I was in the ER having a second miscarriage. Unfortunately, I've come across more than a few of these types of medical "professionals" over my many years of chronic illness. I've never understood why these types go into the medical field when they seem to lack any smidge of empathy or manners.

Golly, you could have had a blood clot causing the pain, which is potentially life-threatening. What a jerk.
Posted 6/30/2016 3:50 PM (GMT 0)
That is infuriating! I was just teaching my 9 year old about Karma-- hope this jerk gets his soon. So sorry that you had to go through this. It is very upsetting when you have to deal with this type of "person" and have a disease on top of it. Hope you are feeling better!
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