Had some tragic news

Thanks folks. I'm calmer now, but must admit my thinking went down a path earlier which scared me sh!tless :/ I feel so alone. My brother's death isn't my first loss this year. Over the summer I lost a friend as well (not to suicide, he had a heart attack). I say 'friend', but we had a bad falling out a couple of months before his death - as much, if not more, my fault than his. I miss him too, although in the general scheme of things I hadn't known him that long - about a year. I don't know how to get through this, I honestly, truly don't.

I do have one good friend, who I was texting tonight: that helped. But I don't like to lean on her too much, as she has her own problems too.

Anyway thank you everyone. I'm drinking a cup of tea, because that's, well, what I do. Drink tea :-/

NCOT,

I too worry about you. Please do not think you do not serve a purpose. During some of my darkest moments you were there...and you didn't even know it. I would search and read your comments and it helped ground me, it helped me finally dig in and get the courage to accept what was at that time unacceptable. You gave me your strength when I didn't have any of my own. You helped me and many others with your no nonsense approach to problems we were too close to be objective to. There were times when I had lost hope and the road was so very scary....and you brought me through it...safely...and a little wiser... I wish you lived close to me. I just want to give you a bunch of big hugs.

You are our friend. You are special and unique. We care about you more than you know. Please stay strong. When you feel the need for a shoulder to lean on or someone to vent to...we are all here.....

Hang in there my friend!!

Clo

Thanks Clo and scifigal *hugs* ;-;

I'm calmer today. Took some amitriptyline and codeine last night, which fortunately kicked in and I slept fairly well, albeit for some disturbing dreams. I'm just going to have a very easy day and try not to think too much.

NCOT, thanks for enlightening us about the drink. Like Randy, I was thinking what the he$$, lol. You really have no idea how many people you have helped in this forum. Sometimes just posting hi, sorry you are having trouble can go a very long way with a person. When I joined HW back in 04 I think it was, it was this forum that saved my sanity. I was not in a good place mentally or physically.

Take care.

I am so sorry to hear this. I hope that things are slowly getting easier for you, but I suspect it will be a long while of roller coaster emotions. Be kind to yourself and take care.

NCOT my thoughts continue to be with you. Really sucks when your family is not! Okay, you supply the tea, what would you like us to bring? Sweets, sandwiches, carrot fries, whatever you like? Even though we can't be together in person to comfort you, we sure can be there in heart with you, to share a tear or two, a word or two or more, you can even share your anger, and a virtual big hug from all of us.

LoL, what do ducks like to eat, or is there a sign that says "Do not Feed the Ducks"!


((((((( HUGS ))))))))))

"I'll take a photo of the ducks to show you guys."

yes please !

Hey folks, I'm back >_>. I'm sorry, the ducks didn't come out as well as I'd like. It was better last year, when the whole canal was nearly frozen over but for one small patch of water - the ducks were treating the edge of the ice like the beach; some were sunning themselves on the 'beach', while others kept on jumping in and out of the water.

Ducks:
VIEW IMAGE

A pair of swan parents and their nearly grown-up youngster:
VIEW IMAGE

Canal bridge:
VIEW IMAGE

Another canal pic 'cos I couldn't decide between this and the previous one:
VIEW IMAGE

I also had a text and an email from my dad a short while ago. Bit scared to check the email in case somebody else had died, but it wasn't that. Apparently my mum had asked my dad to give him the details of the phone me and my mum had decided upon for her friend's Xmas present. My dad also added cryptically "She might just be weakening a bit on the "I'll never, never, never..." front." Never, ever what? Just come out with it straight, you pair of raging drama queens.

I had forgotten all about the wretched phone. To be honest, I'm not entirely convinced my mum doesn't remember it, since it's basically a more recent version of her own phone, a Moto E4. It would also still be in her tablet's browing history, I'm sure. On the other hand, my mum is technologically clueless, so it might be a genuine request. Either way I'm annoyed as hell and in two minds about whether to tell my dad what phone it is or not.

@Dorri - Oops sorry. I had seen your post, honestly! I had to google pinwheel sandwiches: they look like sliced wraps. I like wraps and sandwiches about equally, but the pinwheel ones look a bit small to me: I like something you can properly bite into.

As for dates, I'm pretty much free any time, so I'll leave it to other people to decide :-/

Post Edited (NiceCupOfTea) : 12/10/2017 11:32:33 AM (GMT-7)

Thanks straydog! This is the first real snow we've had in years. The north of England gets snow a bit more reliably, but in the south you can go years without seeing any snow on the ground.

As for my mum, why can't she just phone me up like a normal person? It's not a dislike of speaking on the phone, because she's always phoning various people up. So weird.

Thanks dorri. Nah, this will be gone soon - snow never lasts more than a few days here. But the canal does look very pretty in the summertime; it's incredibly green.

14th December is okay with me. I'm not sure what to say, except thank you so much for the thought.

I think the 14th is great - I'm planning it in my phone now.

The pictures are lovely! I live in Houston, and we even had snow this week! Like an inch! I was so excited. Winter is my favorite season. I love the snow and the cold, brisk days, bundled up inside cozy with a fire and hot chocolate.

Sadly the snow has already mostly gone ;_; Glad I got out yesterday and didn't wait until today.

@scifigal - Agreed about winter being my favourite season! It's nice to find a fellow winter lover. Normally all I hear are people moaning about the winter; and then, when summer does finally arrive, the weather and how it's never hot enough. (Or, on the three genuinely hot days a year, how it's too hot.) I must be weird because I love the cold, brisk days and the dark evenings. The only thing I'm missing is a real log fire - or, heck, even a fake log fire.

@dorri - Depends on how much sugar you add, but no, it probably isn't as sweet. I'm fond of hot chocolate as well, but don't drink it very often for some reason. I tend to drink tea at home and coffee in cafes. Time to buy a jar of cocoa from the supermarket and have a quality cup of hot chocolate: I've even got some vanilla extract I can add to it :p