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Posted 4/19/2009 2:22 PM (GMT 0)
Hello My depression is still upon me and I have real problems in the morning's.

I awake feeling dread and mild anxiety. This does go away but feels horrible. I sleep ok now and take nefazadone 200mg at night and 100mg daytime.

I did use Ambien for years and stopped in November except I took a total of three over 5 days and got sick so I stopped two weeks ago. I felt this all the time while on the Ambien and also felt it without. I know I may still have Withdrawal symptoms from the few Ambien I took but wonder if others feel this morning anxiety/dread?

Glen

Posted 4/19/2009 3:20 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Glen,

I feel pretty rough in the mornings until my meds kick in. But no anxiety. I wonder if you need some extra medication to combat that. I take xanax for anxiety and it works well. I hope that you find something to help you. Maybe it is the way you wake up. Do you use an alarm clock, or do you just wake up on your own. I know that alarm clocks often make me jump in the morning and that will make me anxious. So no alarms for me.

I hope that this passes soon. Keep us posted and let us know how you are doing.

Hugs, Karen
Posted 4/19/2009 4:35 PM (GMT 0)
My wife has depression and she says that her worst time is in the morning. She dreads the start of the day. It generally takes all day before she starts to feel better; which tends to be when I'm getting tired and ready to go to sleep.
Posted 4/19/2009 4:40 PM (GMT 0)

Glen,

It is very normal for people with Depression to feel at their lowest point in the morning. I used to wake up and while still in bed burst in to tears wondering how I would get through another day and why did I not wake up happy and excited as I used to before the  depression took me by the neck and swung me around.

I was in the middle of a  major depressive  episode or as it used to be known, a nervous breakdown. I fought long and hard and went through a lot of therapy and many meds but I can now say that I am doing better.

Never give up and know that one day you will see the light at the end of the tunnel and one morning you will wake up and feel OK. 

Stick with us and know we care.

I wish you peace,
Kitt

Posted 4/19/2009 6:16 PM (GMT 0)
Thanks

That was a comfort. I read that cortical levels are high in the morning and this may add to the issue.

I can no longer take benzodiazpines as I misused tham during a crisis and became addicted. I wish I could take them but my nature is to misuse.

I even got in trouble with Ambien after several years without issue. My life went haywaire the past year and a half with too many details to get into now.

I pray this depression lifts soon I am also afraid to begin any new AD drugs as I am afraid of WD as we read so much about besides, I've tried them all.

Maybe I'll give Welbutrin another try but it has caused increased anxiety in the past

Glen
Posted 4/19/2009 7:53 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Swan,

If you take the wellbutrin, can you take anything with it to curb the anxiety? Just a thought. I hope that you find what works for you. Keep us posted.

Hugs, Karen
Posted 4/19/2009 8:37 PM (GMT 0)

Glen,

Hey this is Kitt.  My P-doc started me on Buspar first and then the  Wellbutrin as she claims the Wellbutrin does not have the anxiolytic properties that you have in the SSRIs/SSNIs.  I liked the Buspar and still take it but could not tolerate the Wellbutrin as it made me feel wired and dizzy.

I know all about the tendency to want to take more of a drug then prescribed and I have gotten caught up in that issue myself.  I had to give up using Vicodin as I felt I was liking it to much so I weaned off that a couple of years ago.............your right coming off is as hard as going on many of these medications.

Take care my new friend.

Kitt

Posted 4/20/2009 3:48 AM (GMT 0)
yeah glen, sometimes i do, especially when it is stuff that i have to do of an offical nature. stay strong, and keep fightin'. jamie.

Posted 4/20/2009 1:30 PM (GMT 0)
I too feel that way in the morning. it is like an overwhelming dread that engulfs me for most of the day. Then I feel better as the day progresses. You are not alone. God bless you in this hard time.
Posted 4/20/2009 2:01 PM (GMT 0)
I often feel better as the day progresses too. So I understand how you all feel. We will just keep on keeping on. That is the best that we can do.

Hugs, Karen
Posted 4/20/2009 4:15 PM (GMT 0)
Thanks to all

As far as my Faith in God, that has not gone away. I do however have times where I question my Faith. I feel as though God wants me to go through things. As it reads in James, bad things are not of God.

That makes me believe we are indeed tested by evil. I have an understanding of suffering as a path to His glory but as a mere human, it still hurts!

My understanding usually comes after the "storm" as it is so hard to see His plan while in a whirlwind.

I got up early and ate quickly and this helped a bit however I got in an argument with my faincee over money I"borowed" from her and this was stressful.

I was robbed and she told me not to worry about the money so I took it from abox where she has me hold the money I give her for 'rent". Well she spoke the words but really wanted me to "ask" for the money which I kinda though but it hurst to "beg". I'm a little annoyed but take responsibility for naot asking. I was victimized by thses young thugs and did not have the energy to have to beg for money just to eat.

Sorry that was kinda off topic and she has apologized so no harm no foul!

Glen
Posted 4/21/2009 3:02 PM (GMT 0)

yeah  pdate

Sleeping very well but arise early and hate this as I use sleep during th day to escape. maybe this will force me into action. Ihad a little lesss morning anxiety and know that it will pass as the day wears on.

I still feel out of place living with my fiancee. I do love her but find it very hard to express it. I feel so blunted and hope this gets better, An example of the blunting is this:

My beloved neice who I love like a child of my own had a baby a few months ago ( a beautiful girl Sadie) and while pleased she had the child, i felt nothing of joy! This is so hard to accept. I pray that life takes on new meaning. more to the point-Just meaning! I feel so pointless and useless right now.

I carry on life in the hopes it will get better. I know it will as God is good and I need to be of value again.

Glen

Posted 4/21/2009 9:53 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Glen,

Like many of us, I also find the mornings to be the toughest with depression. However, I do find that getting up early does help.....I don't know if it's the additional daylight that I get, or the fact that it gives me a chance to get some things done before the demands of the world start pulling me in different directions.....maybe it's both. I'm having a low period right now, too, and I know what you mean about not feeling joy when you think you should (i.e. the birth of your niece's daughter). I rely on faith, as you do, and things do come around eventually. It gets tiresome, I know, when you feel like you have to keep working on it, but you probably know as I do that giving up and escaping only feels better in the short term, and seems to make things worse in the long term. So....please, don't give up! I'm struggling at the moment, too, but I'm finding that recognizing even the smallest of accomplishments in my day, and reminding myself of what I'm grateful for, does help to keep me going. Good luck, and please hold onto that faith!
Posted 4/22/2009 1:34 AM (GMT 0)

Thank you my friend it is nice to find so many kindred spirits

I'm happy to say that all and all it was a pretty good day. I am lucky ( I think) that I do not have a lot of demands on me as I am disabled and out of work. When I get better I will get back to being a volunteer as it gives me worth and something to feel good about. I must wait for aperiod of time as I felt ok before only to relaspe soon after.

I hope the worm has turned!

Glen

Posted 4/22/2009 3:27 AM (GMT 0)
Hi Glen,

I'm glad you had a good day today. :-)

I enjoy volunteering, too, when I am able, because like you, I find that it gives me a feeling of worth and purpose. It's true that it requires a certain amount of energy (physically and spiritually), but you'll get there - I can feel it!

I feel some hope radiating from your post, so hang onto that. I wish you a very good day tomorrow, too.
Posted 4/22/2009 5:16 AM (GMT 0)
Duplicate post, 3rd one found in this forum..........deleted.

Kitt

Post Edited By Moderator (stkitt) : 4/22/2009 8:29:41 AM (GMT-6)

Posted 4/22/2009 10:08 PM (GMT 0)
Thanks I feel like maybe I'm on my way to recovery

Thank you all

Glen
Posted 4/23/2009 1:19 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Glen,

 

It's wonderful to hear you talking that way.  Knowing that you're starting to feel more positive and hopeful is lifting my spirits, too.  :-)

Posted 4/23/2009 2:39 PM (GMT 0)
Thanks

Another day of feeling ok. I went to the gym yesterday and will go again today. Sadly it kicks up my pain until the body adjusts to the workout.

Glen
Posted 5/3/2009 4:37 PM (GMT 0)
Update

Still feeling bad in the AM but it pass's quickly as the day wears on. I wish it would just vanish as it is a horrible feeling.

I slept upstate as I had to leave my car overnight to get fixed. Gee, I felt so much better that morning. I am going to wait a year but may have to move back upstate. I love the slow pace and small town feel. I love my fiancee but may have to live on a commuter basis. We did this for nearly three years and it can work. She will not move upstate and i do not blame her at all.

Oh well it sure ain't easy lol

Glen
Posted 5/4/2009 3:05 PM (GMT 0)
Glen,

I hope you're feeling better today.

Mornings are a bad time for my wife also. It takes a long time for her to start to feel OK.
Posted 5/4/2009 11:57 PM (GMT 0)
H Glen,

I can relate to what you're saying. I am from a small, rural community, and when I married, I moved to a large city to be closer to my husband's job. I found it to be quite an overwhelming change for me. It's good that you're thinking of a compromise (meaning the commuting situation), and it sounds like you really understand your needs and hers. Good for you. :-)
Posted 5/6/2009 5:02 PM (GMT 0)
Thanks

I have to move
Posted 5/6/2009 5:39 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Glen,

Well, I can understand! I moved back to my hometown not that long ago, and I must say I am much more comfortable here. I hope things work out for you.....you have my best wishes and support.
Posted 5/7/2009 3:10 AM (GMT 0)
Hi All

Your experience with depression has provided me enough inputs.

Infact, I too suffer from severe clinical depression. Mornings are the worst. I feel like crying. There is too much of palpatation. I had a bad marriage, betrayed in professional parternship, lots of complications after surgery, wife dumped me just after surgery.

The pain which I have gone through because of sudden changes has really put me into nervous breakdown. I try to keep myself busy and to get on with life. However, finding it too difficult to move on. Shattered.

Anyway life has to move on.
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