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Posted 11/12/2009 4:33 AM (GMT 0)
Beverley,

Your situation just isn't going to work in the long term. No one can be that consistently ignored and abused and put up with it forever. With those kinds of expenses, you could just about find a place with a roommate who didn't treat you nearly as bad as your parents do. Also, I really think you should talk to a counselor. A lifetime of living with that kind of verbal abuse and dismissal has left you with almost no self-esteem. You deserve better. Really think about what it's going to take to get out of there.

serafena
Posted 11/12/2009 5:38 AM (GMT 0)
Hi to all,

I think I need a break from coming here everyday to let out my anger,thought's ect!!! I dont want to depress people who have enough on there mind's to deal with. Take care everyone and I hope all goes well for all of you. Thankyou again for the support but I have to stop doing this, as I know it does distress certain people.

Hopefully back again soon,

damagedgoods............. :((((((((((((
Posted 11/12/2009 4:15 PM (GMT 0)
Beverly,

I am so sorry that they don't care. It sounds like they aren't very emotional people.

I hope that you are able to move soon. I think you will be much happier that way. You don't deserve this.

And I agree about the money. Some people are just money oriented. Which is sad. Because it does not bring happiness whatsoever.

My compute is messing up, so this will be short. I hope that your day gets better. Know that I am thinking about you.

Hugs, Karen
Posted 11/13/2009 1:43 AM (GMT 0)
    hi Karen,

Hope all is well for you???? Ive realized that i need to come to this forum as it's the only place i can go and get real help from those who understand depression,anxiety ect!! What im trying to say is i need to be here. Thankyou again for your reply. And yes Mum and Dad are very money driven,infact money is there life!! Very sad to be like that.

Also letting you know that im still working and yes my Dad just hates that i have proved him very wrong and he is very jealous of me for doing so but that;s his problem not mine anymore. I also wrote my Mum a letter thismorning trying to explaine to her how im feeling,what i would like from her,as in a good talk about everything and i also told her that i TRULY LOVE HER NO MATTER WHAT. Now i actually feel a little better for doing so. I have left it on her bed so when she comes home it will be there for her and i will be at work so she can read it in peace and hopefully take it all in before i come home. Im not sure if it was a good idea or a bad idea to write a letter??? Confused.

Take care to all & Karen,

damaged....... idea idea     xx

Posted 11/13/2009 9:12 AM (GMT 0)
yeah  Hi Karen,

How are you?? Doing well I hope. Just replying to ur post to me about my work. I had a job today with a new client but last night I sent her a message to ask if it was still ok for doing your house Fri morning and also asked her if she could put the airconditioner on for me just for the 4hrs as it's so hot at the moment!! I really need it so I dont dehydrate with my ileostomy which she doesn't know I have as "its my business".

Then 5 minutes after I sent her the message she sent another back and said dont come tommorrow as I dont want the airconditioner on at all??

Anyway I sent a msg back to say dont worrie about the air I will still do the house for you. Then she sent me another and said "oh Beverley dont come 2morrow as I cant afford it this week and said I will see you in 2 weeks. Well did that get me so angry as I had already declared the amount of money I would have earned to centrelink and It comes out of my disability money which I really need. So Im not going back to her for that reason and other thing's to. But thisafternoon I went to see a new client who had heard about my cleaning business, well I got there and the house was absolutely magnificent. It's 90 squares of living space,7 bathroom's,6 bedroom's an indoor full length swimming pool with spa,toilet bathroom shower ect!~!  Wow it totally blew my mind. I got the contract after an hour and I start this coming tuesday. They are a lovely couple with 2 children and would like me to do there home 1-2 times a week. I'm so happy and had a "happy cry" when I got home. I'm really proud of myself with what i have done in a matter of a couple of weeks. And now I can afford to move out on my own!!!! Yippeeeeeeeee................... Sorry Im just very happy for a change. Thankyou so much Karen because the only reason I did anything today was because of what you said to me in your post.

Thankyou,Thankyou. Your just so kind and understanding.......

Take care Karen,

damaged....... yeah turn tongue yeah

Posted 11/13/2009 1:37 PM (GMT 0)
Glad you're feeling better today,Beverley! You deserve something positive for a change. Positive things in our lives certainly does wonders for our attitudes doesn't it? Nice to hear about your business and to know your work is picking up. Until next time, take care and keep up the good attitude. More and more good days are beginning to come your way.

Your friend,
gentleman k
Posted 11/13/2009 5:49 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Beverly,

You really make me feel so good.  I am glad that it helped you to read what I wrote. 

It sounds like this new client was meant to be.  Losing the other one gives you more time with the new one.  So that was probably meant to be also.

I am so happy for you right now.  And wow, this sounds like a wonderful house to clean, kind of big, but hey, that is more money.  I really am truly happy for you.  This makes my day!  Always love to hear when things work out good for people. 

I think that it is good that you left that letter for your mom.  She might not react so well, but that is to be expected.  So hopefully she will understand, but if not, don't take it out on yourself, it is her, not you.  Remember that.  It sounds like she has emotional problems, and that is not your problem.  Just keep working on yourself.  Soon you will be out on your own.  And you will be happy. 

Take care my dear friend.  I hope that you have a wonderful day.  Or night, being you are in Australia.  I really wish you the best.

Hugs, Karen

Posted 11/14/2009 2:24 AM (GMT 0)
smilewinkgrin  Dear Karen & GentlemanK,

Hello and thankyou so much to both of you for your kind word's and support for me. I cant thankyou enough. Also when I got home last night from my new clients I had a look in Mum;s room to see if she had opened the letter anyway it was still sitting on her pillow, so I said to her Mum what's this?? She picked it up and said I dont know what is it. I said Mum open it and read it please and walked off. Then about 15 minutes later she came outside to me and said "Beverly thankyou for the letter and thankyou for explaining all to me and ur father. Then she came over and put her arm's around me and gave me a big kiss and said "I LOVE YOU TO BEVERLEY AND ALWAY'S WILL" well I just fell apart with so many different emotions as my Mum or Dad have never told me they LOVE ME but it worked and for the first time in 41yrs Mum finally said the word's that i needed to hear,it was truly wonderful!!!!!

My Dad hasn't had a read as yet as I dont think he want's to,but that's his problem not mine anymore. Anyway gotta go and do some work and will catch up very soon.

You are both gem's,

damaged............ yeah smilewinkgrin

Posted 11/14/2009 5:03 AM (GMT 0)
Oh well I thought is was to good to be true regarding my parent's.
I was wrong again!!! I'm just an idiot to think they really cared for me. But something has happened again with my Father and back to square one again. Now Im so angry I could scream...................... ENOUGH IS ENOUGH A PERSON WITH FEELINGS CAN ONLY TAKE SO MUCH!!!!!!

I HATE LIFE AND LIVING.
Posted 11/14/2009 5:29 AM (GMT 0)
Beverly,

What has happened? Is your mom still being understanding? Let us know. I am so sorry for whatever happened.

I am beat, so I have to go. Got to work again tomorrow, but am thinking about you. Let us know what is going on.

Hugs to you,

Karen
Posted 11/14/2009 7:57 PM (GMT 0)
Yes Beverley, sorry to hear that things aren't going too well again for you. Like Karen said please let us know what is going on. We're thinking about you and we really care.

gentleman k
Posted 11/15/2009 3:01 AM (GMT 0)
confused  Dear Karen & GentlemanK,

Thanks for the reply's. Yes something has happened again but cant talk about it at the moment as im not coping well at all. im going to see my g.p. tomorrow as i cant go on like this anymore. when ive seen my doctor i will tell you both more about what's happening. Please look after yourself's and again thankyou both so much "FOR CARING" it means so much to me.  sob sob sob........  xxxxx

Damaged..................... cry   cry   

Posted 11/15/2009 3:09 AM (GMT 0)
Beverly,

Know that we are here to support you.

Hugs, Karen
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