That's it. I'm through.

Hey guys, sorry about posting another thread so soon after my last one. 

I went to my pdoc today, and since the medicine I'm currently on isn't helping my depression at all, she suggested a lot of things that she thinks are going to help me.  When I say A LOT, I mean a heck of A LOT.  I don't want to go too far into it, but my treatment in the near future is going to consist of everything- a lifestyle change, diet change, excercise change, supplements, lab testing, sleep, and not to mention 2 different medications for mood stabilzation and concentration!  I know that I'm only in the beginning stages of treatment, but this is wayyy to much!  I have to work hard for everything- I don't want to have to work hard for my stupid life on top of everything else!  Plus, one of the medications has serious side effects if it's not used properly; which means I can't eat any new foods, or really do anything new to my body until it gets used to the meds, if it ever does. 

I know I'm the one who wanted treatment in the first place, but it feels like all of this is just being thrown at me at once! Plus I hate putting unnatural things into my body, even if they do help my moods.  I don't know.. But I'm pretty sure that I'm going to quit treatment.  Maybe I can just conquer this on my own, and if not... Well, it'll not be anything I haven't lived through before.  It's tiring to be searching through your thoughts and your head all the time, and it's not helping at all!  I've lived with this all my life; it might get worse, granted, but I'm beyond caring if I can handle it or not.

Thanks for reading.. Hope everything is going well with you all.

Thanks for answering Karen.  I think I got a bit overwhelmed from everything that's going on.  I've been taking it one step at a time, like you said, and I'm having faith it's going to get better.  Plus I jumped to my natural reaction to new things- to run away.  After some convincing from my family and myself, though, I realize that I'm not going to quit before I try anything. I'm back on my meds, lol.

Thanks again!

I'm happy to hear that you hung in there and gave it a try as well. You never know if it could have changes your life around if you never gave it a shot. Congrats on your courage.

The Giver

Hello,

I totally understand what you're talking about. I was in a similar situation. My first counselor didn't really pressure me to do much...she suggested exercise and writing and just worked on techniques with me so that I could stand up for myself.

My second counselor I went to was really laid back. he was basically just there to listen, which was nice.

Now my third and last counselor..well...I thought she was nice but my last few sessions were hell. I suffered from bulimia and she told me she thought I was lying about it and told me I needed to lose weight. At that point, I was pretty much done. Keep in mind while with this third counselor I tried 2 different anti-anxiety medicatins that did nothing for me.

All that I wrote above is relevant! let me explain....
I can understand how a counselor will say "hey, start exercising, change your diet, be healthier and youll feel happier." I've heard it before. What you need to remember is when it comes to something like depression, you can't give up. It's not something that will just go away. I thnk once a person has symptoms of depression, they'll always be depressed. But what you can do is fight it and make it better.
Please do not give up yet. Just go at your own pace. Next time you go to sessions just explain to the therapist that you felt overwhelmed with all the info, and you feel you need to work slower at this. Sometimes i had to just step back and breathe before moving forward.

Also, it took me a long time to try medications. I was very discouraged after the first one I tried left me feel lousy. But I gave it another shot and tried a second. It didnt do anything for me. So I just continued with therapy. Meds aren't for everyone-so don't feel you NEED to be on some.

Best of luck to you-remember..don't give up. You can fight this.