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I'm in the way

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Posted 6/5/2011 12:40 PM (GMT 0)
I'm 31 yrs old. I'm the youngest child out of 2. I'm closest to my parents since I'm the baby of the family. My Mom has Lupus and so do I. I feel terrible that they have me for a daughter, b/c I'm sick with this disease. I wish they could have a healthy daughter like my sister. I want to have a husband and children, but my disease is progressive and my doctor's do not recommend it children. My parents have to care for my nephew and when I get sick like right now I have shingles, so they can't be around me. It's difficult for them to see me in the ER room or hear me call and say I'm not feeling well. I want to give them only good news and ask about how their day is going. Their lives seem more interesting then mine. They are retired, in love, happy, have their grandson, and I'm in the way.
Posted 6/5/2011 12:46 PM (GMT 0)
Hi there,

You are not in the way. You can't help you have lupus. And I know your family loves you very much. When you call them, be pleasant and try not to talk about yourself. Unless they ask. I am sure that they care and love you very much. So please don't feel guilty for being ill. Like I say, you can't help it. Maybe you mother feels guilty that she gave it to you in some way. All I know is that you are a special person and shouldn't be beating yourself up. You are loveable and are loved. Keep posting. I hope htat you feel better soon.

Many gentle hugs, Karen
Posted 6/5/2011 1:19 PM (GMT 0)
I never thought that my Mom felt that way. That she's guilty. It's just generic's. I don't want her to feel sorry for want happened to us. I wish there was something I could say to her to ease her pain she feels.
Posted 6/5/2011 2:54 PM (GMT 0)
Just let her know that you love her and that will be enough. I don't know she feels that way, but she might. Sweetie, there are many children needing a good home. And if you can't have one of your own. You can always adopt. I know you would be a good mother. Good luck with your mom and your family. Never think that you are in the way. You are loved.

Hugs, Karen

PS  They are coming up with more and more information on lupus all the time.  Maybe they can put it into remission.  Never give up hope...  Here for you...

Posted 6/8/2011 6:57 AM (GMT 0)
I'm having an IUD put in tomorrow. The pregnancy pills clash with my medication, so an IUD was recommended. One day I'll be healthy and find a husband that wants kids then I can have the IUD taken out. That's my pos. thinking.
Posted 6/8/2011 11:40 AM (GMT 0)
I am not sure, but I think they need to come out after five years and be replaced, I could be wrong.

Hugs, Karen
Posted 6/19/2011 2:31 AM (GMT 0)
I'm afraid to get the IUD since it's a foreign object being implanted and with Lupus inflammation could happen internally sometimes. I get swollen from the inflammation already all over my body.
Posted 6/19/2011 8:06 AM (GMT 0)
definately check with your dr. with healing compassion, jamie
Posted 6/21/2011 4:15 AM (GMT 0)
I'm going to meet with my Mom and her therapist on Wed. to work things out. We talk daily, but she's having a hard time dealing with my illness, so we have to talk about it.
Posted 6/21/2011 4:35 AM (GMT 0)
that is a good plan. all the best with the appt. with compassion, jamie
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