I feel like everything goes wrong for me

I am very new to this website. I feel as if this will help me.

Im just going to get to the point. I feel depressed. Im never happy anymore. Itll be on and off where Ill feel happy one day then the next day I'll be back right where i started. I always ask the question, "why me?" I feel as if everything goes wrong for me. I am a freshman at college and I am already not doing too well. My decision to come to college may not have been the best one concidering I didnt do too well in High School. I have a family that loves me. I have no problems with my family. If i were to tell someone i feel depressed they probably wouldnt believe me. Theres no other way to put it. Im just not happy and its killing me...litterally. If one little thing goes wrong I lose it and get so angry and sad and I get suicidle. I even have this wonderful girlfriend that loves me to death. She has been there for me this whole time no matter how mad I get. She is the only one who knows about my thoughs and feelings. I dont believe i have anger problems. I get angry because of frustration. I get very frustrated with everything because i feel as if I'm doing everything wrong or everything bad happens to me. I know i have something wrong with me and all I've been doing is ignoring it for about 8 months. I dont want to tell my parents because i dont feel comfortable. I even try "acting" happy. I dont know what to do. I know it might not seem like im depressed but I know I am. I know im sad everyday. I know how I feel. I hope someone out there can help me. All i want is to be happy.

Ditto what Karen said above. You aren't weird because you feel this way, all of us are wired up differently. You don't have to have some horrible tragedy going on around you to have depression--in fact, it is very often the case to have these symptoms. You need to go to a professional and tell them about how you're feeling and all the different symptoms and moods. This is not something to be ashamed of at all!

So yeah, reach out to a doctor, a counselor, or a psychologist of some sort. This is something that you can work with and manage, you don't have to sink into it and lose yourself. It's good you went and posted on here, so I hope you post again and let us know how you're doing or if you need to let off some steam. :)