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pointless depressing crush

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Posted 2/7/2013 4:34 AM (GMT 0)
well, this is a really stupid thing especially when i am already going through much bigger problems. but, see there was this guy that liked me and never told me until he was over me. when he told me, i started thinking about it and stupidly fell for him even though i know there is no chance whatsoever. its depressing because there was a chance at some point and i never really saw it when it was there. i thought that maybe he would get me. he seemed to be really my type and honestly, im tired of feeling this way. i ve tried so hard to move on but at the end i end up going back to square one, which makes me feel really upset and pathetic.
Posted 2/7/2013 12:02 PM (GMT 0)
You said something really important in your post. "never told me until he was over me."

That is just it, he is over you now. So your feelings are for not. Compose yourself and work on you for awhile. See what happens. If you two are meant to be you will. But you have more important issues in your life right now and I think you should work on that.

You aren't useless or pathetic. You are a valuable human being. Remember that.

Hugs, Karen
Posted 2/7/2013 1:51 PM (GMT 0)
Laurel welcome to the forum!

It sounds like you are looking for an anchor to hold onto; and this guy threw you one to late.

Whatever your issues are, Karen is correct in that you are a useful person and are NOT pathetic.

I would like to suggest the following books for you to read, they should be helpful for you to center your value and emotions for yourself. You can find them in the local library in most places or purchase at half.com.

Loving Kindness; by Sharon Salzberg

Letting go of the Person I used to Be: By Lama Surya Das

Keep posting here, we support and listen, helping each other through the tough times the we can. remember you are an important person. Do not base your value on someone's opinion that basically says I don't need you.

Stay strong,
Peace
Trina
Posted 2/7/2013 5:12 PM (GMT 0)
People, no matter the age, always have a crush and they don't call it a crush for no reason. This emotion, these feelings are crushing indeed. Even if there was a chance at some point, if there is no longer a chance then maybe it wasn't meant to be after all.

My middle school and high school years were full of crushes and the embarrassing downfalls and pain of each one of them. Our lives are full of ups and downs. Some "downs" just take longer than others. Imagine lives sorta' like a heart monitor. ^_^__^_^_^_^__^_, (sorry, that's the best impression I can post here.) if it didn't have its' ups and downs, we might as well lose our lives as they are.

You're not pathetic by any means. This is just...life. Accept it as it is. Not to minimize your problem but I do not see this as depression, just a part of teenage life, and life as us human beings know it.

- Rainy/DD
Posted 2/7/2013 10:18 PM (GMT 0)
I had a crush on the same guy for...oh....something like 7 years. Even though he was obviously really into one of my friends. He was nice to me sure, but it was obviously never going to happen. Even so, I had a thing for him. And I'm pretty sure all I did was give him quite a few good laughs. (And the rest of MY friends too, come to think of it.)

We can't really control who we're attracted to or have a crush on, but we can choose how we react. I learned my lesson...it just took a while.

If the guy is over you, then really the only thing you can do is move on too. A lot of times we shoot ourselves in the foot by refusing to open ourselves up to the possibilities. Who knows, once you start working on yourself and you leave yourself open to finding someone...you might find someone who is absolutely head over heels crazy for you.

All I did for those 7 years was make it impossible for myself to find someone who really cared about me.

You're not pathetic, you're human. Welcome to the club. We're here for you when you need us.
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