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Posted 10/26/2013 4:33 PM (GMT 0)
Hello people,

I have the need to talk to someone.I'm trying to control my thoughts,trying to be positive,find positive aspects in every circumstance but i often,at a time,maybe daily, i find myself wanting to change my life,doubting myself,isolating myself and generally feeling lonely,hopeless and helpless.I know that depression needs a lot of time and patience but do we ever become as we were before depression? (not on antidepressants,not on any therapy)

My best regards to all of you.
Posted 10/26/2013 5:01 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Jeoch-

To answer your question, for me, I have to take anti depressants. I have a chemical imbalance. Somedays I really don't want to take my meds- I get mad at myself that I have to take pills in order to feel normal. But I know I have to take them.

Honestly I can't remember a time in my life that I wasn't depressed. Since I sought treatment, I'm finally able to live. The glass is half full and I can enjoy the small things daily.

Oh Jeoch, I hope you find peace on this journey called depression. Please know you aren't alone. We are here to help you.

Keep your head up and a smile in your heart!
Michele
Posted 10/26/2013 11:53 PM (GMT 0)
Jeoch,

We can grow beyond what we were before depression if we choose to.

You are in the inevitable slump.

Try a daily gratitude journal it will help you think positively within a couple of day. You can be thankful for anything! Even the tissue you cry into.

Peace
Trina
Posted 10/27/2013 3:17 PM (GMT 0)
Honestly,i don't want to be like this for the rest of my life. I cannot live like this. This is not fair.
Posted 10/27/2013 3:36 PM (GMT 0)
I agree. It's not fair. But just like with other illnesses, we have treatment options. I highly recommend counseling. When I went, I didn't feel so alone and I didn't keep things pinned up inside. That was one of my issues. I would let things fester and I would keep them inside then I would explode. Counseling helps me keep things in perspective.

Have you had any luck with medications before?
Michele
Posted 10/27/2013 3:46 PM (GMT 0)
Jeoch,

Michele is correct that therapy is a great outlet. If money is any issue consider clinics in your area or ask for sliding scale payment plans when you call for information.

You can do this.

Peace
Trina
Posted 10/27/2013 3:53 PM (GMT 0)
Im thinking to go on therapy again,it's just that i believe that it won't help me. I'll call tomorrow for an appointment,i have nothing to lose,right?
Posted 10/27/2013 3:58 PM (GMT 0)
You have nothing at all to lose. I'm going to call tomorrow too. I haven't been since August- I got too busy when work started again. We can do this together! I'll let you know when my appt is- you do the same.

We are here to support you and listen anytime.

Hang in there!
Michele
Posted 10/27/2013 4:10 PM (GMT 0)
Deal :) I feel less lonely now.

Hugs
Posted 10/27/2013 4:20 PM (GMT 0)
You aren't alone. My husband works a lot of hours and my teenagers aren't home much so I'm alone a lot. At times loneliness does creep in. But then I come to HW and I realize that I'm not alone. We are a family and can understand each other when no one else can. None of my family or friends understand my depression. But everyone here does.

Hang in there! We are here for you!
Michele
Posted 10/27/2013 4:25 PM (GMT 0)
Same for me.I don't even talk about how i am. Im faking to all that im fine.That makes me feel suffocated but at least here i can speak the truth. Im glad for heallingwell family.
Posted 10/28/2013 3:04 PM (GMT 0)
Jeoch,

when you go to therapy, you must speak the truth about how you feel, otherwise it will not be effective. The therapist is not a mind reader, they only know what you tell them.

So be honest with them, so you can get the help you deserve.

Peace
Trina
Posted 10/28/2013 9:13 PM (GMT 0)
Hi,im going tomorrow to a new therapist and im feeling a bit anxious about that,is it normal?
Posted 10/28/2013 9:17 PM (GMT 0)
Michele,when is your appointment?
Posted 10/28/2013 10:32 PM (GMT 0)
Hi there-

I have a call into my counselor. Sometimes he will return calls in the evenings. I'm hoping.

And yes, it's completely normal to feel nervous going to someone new. You are asked to share your deepest inner thoughts with a stranger and that can be scary. Just remember, the therapist can't help you until you share. Share as much or as little as you want. It's sometimes tough opening up to new people. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers!

Good luck! Check in tomorrow and tell me how it went. And I will let you know when my appointment is.

Sending love-
Michele
Posted 10/29/2013 1:35 AM (GMT 0)
Jeoch,

you have taken the hardest step and made the appointment with a new person.

Now you just have to get through the first appointment.

remember this person is just like you, with different information, you are just sharing information, nothing to be afraid of. Michele gave you some good points of interest.

Please do let us know how it goes for you. we do care and will support you during this time of change.

Peace and courage
Trina
Posted 10/29/2013 11:50 AM (GMT 0)
Hello,Thank you both for the support. I just came from the session.It went very well,i felt comfortable with her. Im feeling light now. She suggested to go on antidepressants again. I don't wanna tell my family. I going to do that alone.
Posted 10/29/2013 2:02 PM (GMT 0)
Jeoch,

just remember, if you do go back on meds, it is nothing to be ashamed of.
I am on meds for life. It is the way it is. We grow for here, the now.

Peace
Trina
Posted 10/29/2013 7:51 PM (GMT 0)
Jeoch-

I am so proud of you! I am glad you had a good session and that you feel lighter. There is nothing like taking a bit of weight off our shoulders.

I can't get in to see my counselor until December. Oh well, at least I am on his books now.

I take 4 different medicines a day for my depression. Like Trina said, it is nothing to be ashamed of. I have to take them because of chemical imbalance- nothing I can do about that. Take them proudly knowing that you are helping yourself feel better!

I'm glad you feel better!
Michele
Posted 10/31/2013 11:38 AM (GMT 0)
Hey Jeoch-

Just checking in to see how you are doing. Remember, you are never alone!

Michele
Posted 11/3/2013 3:21 PM (GMT 0)
Hi there.

Thank you so much for caring. I've been unhappy as i was .My family never understood and accepted my depression and that makes it even harder because they aren't supportive at all. Im in a constant fight with myself. I don't want to go back on antidepressants. And if i do it,im going to do it alone. I won't let my family know. I'm tired of my life. I WANT TO CHANGE IT. How is you? How have you been?

Love,
Jeoch
Posted 11/3/2013 3:34 PM (GMT 0)
Hey Jeoch!

So good to hear from you. I'm sorry you are still down. I'm right there with you. It's seems this last week, my depression has won. I just don't feel good.

I'm sorry that your family doesn't support you. They probably don't know how. If you had a broken leg, hey could see it and they would try to help you. With depression they can't necessarily see your pain nor do they know how to help you. My family supports me but they don't truly understand. I know it's hard on them and it frustrates them because they don't always know how to help me. Many times , they just give me my space which is exactly what I need.

Today is one of those days. My depression rating is at an 8. I just want to go curl up in bed. My house is a wreck, there is no food in the house and I truly don't care. I need someone to take care of me today instead of taking care of everyone else.

Remember you may feel alone, but you aren't! We are always here for you.

Be strong-
Michele
Posted 11/3/2013 3:47 PM (GMT 0)
Im sorry that you are having a bad too.I hope your family will take care of you today and hopefully tomorrow will be a better day for both of us.
Posted 11/4/2013 11:15 PM (GMT 0)
Trina and Michelle,
How you both doing?
I wanna thank you both for all the times you've replied to me. It meant a lot to me.
Posted 11/9/2013 11:43 PM (GMT 0)
HUGS !!! Hugs always help me and I want to share them !

You have to do what's best for you Jeach, no matter what the family thinks. Counselling is an awesome step !
Maybe, instead of antidepressants, you try diet and exercise, let the family think you've suddenly gone on a health kick......because you will have ! There is diet info here http://www.webmd.com/depression/guide/diet-recovery and any regular exercise raises the good-feeling endorphins in your brain :)

I've recently stopped taking my antidepressants (under doc supervision) and switched over to the dietary and exercise therapy. so far so good!

Hugs and prayers for good days !
MF
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