really down today

i don't really have any close friends. i do have some friends but not anyone i feel i could call on a daily basis. in particular i lack friends of my age, except for some friends from my chat room.

today is a funky day, i was up during the night drinking coffee and hanging out in chat rooms, by the time i got in bed and really slept it was 6 am, and so i slept til 11 and i hate that. i feel like i have been gypped out of half of the day.

i do have some errands and it will be nice to be out of this house!

i really seem to lack the incentive and skills to make friends. and i isolate too much.

i have a sponsor in one of my 12 step programs who always responds to my emails, but it is not the same as having a friend here where i live.

thanks for listening
love, rich

Hi guys,

I understand how you both feel. Brenda so sorry about your sister, I spent my whole life trying to get approval from mine and never made it. Do to other circumstances I desided to removed her out of my life do to toxitity.

This is never easy.

Three years later from recalling abuse memories I have lost 4 friends and made new ones through support groups. However they are not as close. But I am working on the relationships.

I joined a book club to meet people not related to my stuff. I like reading. I walk my dog in the park and have to take rests. So while I sit on the bench people tend to stop and talk, mostly to the dogs.

I believe it is a falicey that people have a lot of friends. If you have one or two friends in your life at any given time a person is lucky. True friends. they don't have to be next door, they can be across the world and still be a very good friend.

Let the perimeters go and look inside the people you know, I am sure you see a friend or two.

Peace and Hugs
Trina

Hi Rich:

I'm sorry that you're really down today and don't really have any close friends. I know exactly how you feel and you are not alone.

I don't really have any friends and I also tend to isolate, especially when my depression is really bad. I don't want to bring anyone else down and at the same time sometimes I feel a little ashamed for even being depressed so I don't want anyone to know.

I've been in a space recently where I wished I had some true friends in my life and in the process of wishing I had friends because I don't have any family I've made the mistake of letting the wrong people in my life. I've been trying to figure out what hurts worse having no one at all or having negative people in my life, my therapist asked me that.

I can also relate to what you are saying about it not being the same having a friend close by. I do feel like I have friends in other states and it's nice to have someone to text, talk & e-mail with but it's also nice to have someone to spend time with or just hang out with.

I hope that you are able to make a new positive friend in your area because I know that lonely feeling all too well and it may take some time but hopefully there is a true friend out there for all of us.


Brendaboo & Trina: I can relate to both of you as well and I'm sending hugs your way!

Thank you le sweet, I found a lot in your post that I could relate to. I too have friends and family that I can really relate to, but that live too far away. I have been a member of a chat room for 10+ years and have made some great friendships there, but of course the most that can go to is a phone call or perhaps a visit.

Lack of friends is a problem that has come up for me over the years. I have also gone through periods where I had plenty of friends.

I have also been trying some different things to meet new people. Some of these tries have been flops - 2 of them I went to, no one else showed up. I learned to do a bit more research before going to a new event, to make sure it is really going to happen.

By the way, you asked about a website to make friends. There is a website called "MeetUp.com" that provides information on activities that anyone can join. Lots going on there.

Thanks again for your posting. I really felt the similarity between our two situations.