feeling helpless

I'm writing on this forum because I feel like I have nowhere else to go. I don’t know whats wrong with me.Nothing has seemed to really help and it's ruining my relationship with my husband ive been married for 9 yrs and things have gotten rocky..mostly because of me. And after I have the baby

When I fall into a pit of depression, I don't want to be around him. I don't really want to be around anyone. I don't find him funny when I'm depressed even though he tries so hard to make me laugh and I analyze our relationship to the extreme and often create issues where there normally isn't one. I say horrible things to him and I just get so irritated with him. When I'm depressed, even though he tells me how much he loves and cares for me, I don't feel anything. I feel numb.I even feel scared and nervous that he will get close to me and have sex with me..My sex drive has gone! He's incredibly loving and supportive. He's always there for me and tries so hard to make me feel better but he can't and he's naturally getting frustrated.

I don't know what to do. When I get depressed, I focus on my relationship and start to think of many weird things and how he would be better off without me.I need to know if other people have felt this way towards their relationships.I love my husband..my son and my family and wants to save our relationship soon! I need to know I'm not alone and that maybe there is hope for me and my relationship. What should I do?

I just cry everytime Im alone and thinking of what could be happening?

Aww, sweetie. I'm so sorry ~ I've been in your shoes and know what it's like to feel so alone and like everything is wrong.

I do agree that the best place to start is with your doctor. If it is postpartum depression, your doc would likely be able to help. It may help to talk with a counselor, as well. Maybe your husband could go with you or at least sit with you while you make the call (?) It sounds like he really loves you and would do anything to help. <3

Also, try to make sure you're eating right and getting enough sleep (not so easy with a baby, I know!). If you can, try to connect with some other moms or even older women who can support and encourage you.

God bless you, dear one. I'll be praying. Take good care, OK?

grammiann
Grammie to 2 precious girls

Pb4,

Just out of curiosity, what does Pb4 stand for? When I see PB, I think of peanut butter. Ha!!!

Hugs, Karen...

Hi Ilovegym,

I would like to let you know that you are NOT ALONE. January I fell into a depression and anxiety phase, which I am still overcoming... During those months, I felt no love for my bf, only guilt. Guilt that I am with him because I do not want to be alone.. I was constantly analyzing the relationship, how he acts and how I act with him. It really is draining and difficult. I talked to my bf and told him how I was feeling, fortunately he was very understanding.. and I suggest you communicate with your man as well. It will help a lot.
Know that this is the depression talking not what you truly are feeling!! Depression sometimes makes us no longer feel any love towards our bf/spouse, bcos they are the closest to us.

I still am struggling with this daily, but I can tell you that with medication I have become better.. and our relationship is still as strong.

Do not make any decisions when you are in this phase... please consult your doctor and a psychologist/therapist to talk would help so much too! I was seeing a psychologist who helped me realize that I truly did love my boy friend but the anxiety and the depression wouldn't let me.
Sometimes I still wake up feeling like this... do i love him or do i not?
But stay strong, this too shall pass

XXX