My depression has increased today....

Do not fret, do not Dispare. I am with you.
My son in jail now for months due to a toxic relationship with my daughter in law mother of my grandchildren and still wants to try with him. He has been clean because he is in jail. For spousal abuse.
The short story yesterday they said they wanted to send him to prison for 13 years. For a black eye. It isn't right. He should never ever put his hands on his wife. Ever. But how many years do the 6 police officers get who arrested him 3 months later. Breaking 6 ribs. And his nose? Two wrongs never make a right.
Shorter story. We can't fix the messes our grown up babies make. "I can't clean this one up for you dude." As mothers we are ready with the wet nap the broom hell even the shovel but there comes a time we can't. I know the weight you carry. I have it too. ( I have raised 7 kids 3 step 4 mine) I know how you are feeling. I can't talk to my husband because he is " cold" we moms say but men just don't have the instinct they can say well it's their fault not mine and sleep like a baby after. We are different. Just remember you are not alone. I found that there are literally Millions of moms out there suffering what we go through we just don't go around saying the somewhat embarrassing things our grown kids have gotten into. It never is a reflection of parenting. But we still take it personal because it's just how a mom operates. I am here for you. Keep posting. Chin up. This too shall pass.
Ps I know a carpenter who is awesome at fixing the unfixable.

Post Edited (Pain$herlock) : 6/19/2015 6:25:39 PM (GMT-6)

Thanks to you both.

Yeah...I know that carpenter too. From what He told me; he had to go through some pretty severe pain because of 'love' too. I so appreciate you candidness. I am sorry for the struggles you too have lived. It takes courage to say how it really is for us and our grown kids struggles. My younger brother said once time to me "you were always in denial about -----." I am sure you know yourself what it took for me to respond without tearing his head off. : ) I responded with, "No, I was never in denial. I knew very well what my son was dealing with. But heck..what did you expect me to say when people asked what he was doing these days. Oh...shooting up; stealing, lying, and more to survive his addiction." Mom's are never in denial.
We that love our kids are connected to our grown kids now and forever, and know them even better than they know themselves at times. I know they need to grow up and leave the nest and move on in life while learning from their sometimes drastic mistakes or not mistakes; but stupid choices. I truly do understand that they need to grow up and get with the program of caring for themselves and their own; as well as we have/had to. Truly time does heal I know that too; and thank you for the reminder that 'this too shall pass'; as all things do.
I get it, you get it, all that have stood and walked where we have;get it don't we. But that never ever makes the pain in our broken hearts stop. We move on after a bad day. We may laugh and smile again; but be assured the sorrow will rear its head again; and we will weep again. The cycle of life.
In closing, as my strength gradually returned some today; I do believe it was a little bit of all three. The food choice I am highly sensitive to, the sorrow I felt, and my chemical depression is worsening. It is time to get back into my doctor and get serious about finding an AD that I am not afraid to try due to changing, and adjusting so much in past with so many emotional side effects.
I thank God for your response. I needed to hear back from someone who has walked a few streets in my shoes.
Bless you and yours.....